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land of sugar - This is a term we use at Lutheran Campus Ministry to mean Perkins Restaraunt. Occasionally, can also mean Denny's or any other eating establishment of that same sort.

e.g., Glen: Anybody wanna go to the Land of Sugar? Various assorted LCM people: Sure.

submitted by Rainbow Woman

land yacht - An extremely large car, especially from the 70s.

e.g., The '73 Cadillac is a land yacht.

submitted by Jim M - (www)

land-o-goshen - My mother used this term as an exclamation. Of Biblical origin. The land the Israelites were given following their 40-year wander in the desert. 1. The best of Pharoah's land. 2. A place of refuge where Pharoah's army was not allowed to enter. 3. A land that was blessed by God. 4. A land protected by God. 5. A place of peace. 5. The term has two, seemingly opposite meanings, and that's why I want to put it in here! The people I've heard use it (like my mother) do so in a slightly negative manner, pertaining to yet another hard task that has popped up but that needs doing. I don't know how this got transliterated to an expression denoting NOT a peaceful place, it may have originated in the South, where my mother grew up. Perhaps it refers to wishing one was in the "Land of Goshen" and didn't have to do this task, thereby attaining Peace. My best guess!

e.g., Land-o-Goshen, I've got a mountain of laundry to do! | Land-o-Goshen, how DID your dress get so dirty?!

submitted by Glenna Foreman

landdroner - The vestige of a once nicely tuned Landrover following years of off-road abuse.

e.g., I could hear the Landdroner coming from half a mile away.

submitted by stella whyte - (www)

landfill - What the passengers hope Captain Phil will do safely at the end of their flight.

e.g., Captain Phil's plane was plagued with problems. When engine number two sputtered and died, the passengers cried out, "For God's sake, landfill!"

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

landing strip - The pubic area of a woman shaved in a rectangular strip shape.

e.g., Jennifer and I had sex together for the first time last night. It was nice to see she had a well-groomed landing strip instead of a giant shrub.

submitted by Tom

landlard - The fathead landlord who won't fix the heat.

e.g., My apartment is freezing and the landlard won't fix the heat.

submitted by Kate

landline - A good old phone line, with actual copper cables. Or a phone that's attached to such a line.

e.g., I can't hear a thing you're saying. Hold on, lemme call you from a landline.

submitted by DavidJ!

lando - (v) To betray. Inspired by that snake-in-the-grass Lando Calrissian.

e.g., Can you believe the way Jesse stole my girl? He landoed me.

submitted by Waffles

landrunder - Four-wheel-drive vehicle on very soft ground.

e.g., Des: My dad has a Landrunder. S: A Landrunder? Des: Yes, it sank in the mud.

submitted by Des Healey

landscraper - Same meaning as landscaper but obviously more descriptive and understandable.

e.g., We hired an excellent landscraper to redo our yard.

submitted by jerry giberti

landscraping - Last bit of detail work done to a new lawn before seeding.

e.g., My backyard is almost ready to seed and fertilize, just needs a bit more landscraping.

submitted by fred wickens - (www)

landshark - People with malevolent intentions who are on the scam for the opposite sex.

e.g., The landsharks quickly began to circle their prey.

submitted by nitag - (www)

landy - A Land Rover, as said by English farmers.

e.g., I've bought a new Landy.

submitted by Jack Stringer - (www)

langauge - A meter for local area network performance (sometimes mis-spelled as "language").

e.g., The English Co. makes a really good langauge; it is recommended that we adopt English as a first langauge.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

langers - To be drunk.

e.g., After drinking 10 pints of guinness, I was langers drunk

submitted by rory

languaphobia - The fear of using the English language properly.

e.g., Because he has languaphobia, Damon often resorts to verbizing or substituing a pseudoword, even when perfectly good English is available.

submitted by Rick Feldkamp - (www)

langusecond - Cross between language and second. When a radio station is changed, this is the time between when the listener realizes the language is foreign and when the body instantly changes the station.

e.g., I was driving near the border, looking for a strong station. It was a langusecond when I found a station and then changed it because I could not understand anything that was being said.

submitted by Mallard

lanhiage - A language created by not correcting typos.

e.g., Oops... Great typo. We'll add that one to the lanhiage.

submitted by Peter

lankie - Slang term for a Sri Lankan.

e.g., Was he a Lankie?

submitted by drdevious - (www)

lapanickel - A slap you make on your knee when you laugh extremely hard.

e.g., The emcee was lapanickel funny.

submitted by Joni Brandt - (www)

laprechaun - A leprechaun who will sit in your lap if only you will give him (back) a piece of his gold, and he might even dance a jig on the lap.

e.g., I have me a gold piece, now all I need is to find me a genuine laprechaun.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

laption - The actions associated with a lapdance.

e.g., "Tonight I am going to go out and get some laption!"

submitted by h_ank

laptop - Anything, such as a cat, small dog, or small child that you can use to wriggle out of chores by persuading one to clamber up for a story or stroke of the ears.

e.g., I'd take the rubbish out, but I'm busy with the laptop.

submitted by annelise dunn

laptoppin - The public use of a laptop computer.

e.g., She was at Starbucks laptoppin.

submitted by Andrew Stubbs Johnston - (www)

laputanck - Cheap book.

e.g., I'm a bit low on cash for the brand new edition. I'll just buy a laputanck instead. Most likely online.

submitted by Hannah - (www)

lapvermin - Those index card-sized pieces of advertising fluff that fall into your lap when you're trying to read a zine.

e.g., Cripes, Margaret. How many lapvermin can they put in one friggin' issue of Oprah?

submitted by Roger Mexico

laquidate - To make up a multisyllable word with no meaning during conversations to appear smarter than you really are.

e.g., Bob laquidated his way through the job interview to get hired.

submitted by Jason Thompson - (www)

lar - A non-gender-specific pronoun, replacing both "his" and "her;" especially useful to avoid having to say "his/her."

e.g., "Everyone should open lar book to page seven." "Maggie was starting to doze off when Fred touched lar shoulder to wake lar up."

submitted by Jo Ginsberg

lar - Prevaricator; teller of falsehoods. (Can we get a photo of an ex-President in here?) (Which one?)

e.g., Politicians from the South generally call their opponents lars; they're all lars. (To call a politician a lar is clearly redundant.)

submitted by Blue Hornet

larapin - Cowboy slang for great food, usually home-cooked.

e.g., Erle, this BBQ chicken is downright larapin.

submitted by Ken Price from Montana

larb - To butter excessively.

e.g., If you're making me toast, please don't larb it like you did last time.

submitted by Louise Van Hine - (www)

larcen - (LAHR-sen; v.) 1. To steal: specifically, as in the old common law, "to take and carry away the personal property of another with intent to deprive the owner permanently of possession thereof." (n.) 2. One who indulges in larceny, a thief. [Back formation from "larceny."]

e.g., There used to be several types of larceny---plain larceny, larceny by trick, and embezzlement. A larcen had a smorgasbord of approaches available. A burglar or a robber had no such variety. Robbery was larceny accomplished through force or fear. Burglary was "to break and enter into the dwelling house of another at night for the purpose of committing a felony therein." So it was "rob," "burgle," and "larcen" in the old days. The old definitions no long apply. Nowadays, it's all just "theft," and no archaically poetic list of defining elements.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lardicious - Something containing, or having vast quantities of lard.

e.g., Edmond, that man is absolutley lardicious. He should lay of the crisco if you know what I'm saying.

submitted by Alex

large - One thousand, particularly dollars.

e.g., That shipment of Beanie Babies will cost you forty large.

submitted by dave

laripin - A favorable description of food: delicious, yummy, tasty. Laripin', lariping.

(ED. The phrase "larruping good" rings a bell, but I'm not sure which might be the most common of several spellings: larapin, larapin', laraping, etc. So, I'll defer to Evan Morris (The Word Detective), who says "larruping" is the one. Do You Speak American also has an extensive entry, as does Polk County (Georgia) Chat.)

e.g., Man, that steak cooked over the open campfire was laripin.

submitted by Don C. Duckering - (www)

larkhead - Stupid, idiot, fool.

e.g., Larkhead, GET!

submitted by madhuri

larp - An abbreviation meaning Live Action Role Playing, also used as a noun to refer to the activity itself.

e.g., We were at the LARP until almost 3 AM last Saturday.

submitted by RC

larrogant - An arrogant larrakin.

e.g., Macka's get's a bit boisterous when he's drunk...turns into a bit of a larrogant.

submitted by phil wild

larry - Left turn.

e.g., Hey, the party's up here. Hang a Larry into that parking lot.

submitted by JohnnyG

lart - Lamer Attitude (Re)adjustment Tool, anything from a wooden bat to a low electrical current.

e.g., If you don't stop tripping my sister, I'll beat you with my LART.

submitted by Stephen Free - (www)

lase - Poorly formed stem of the acronnym LASER. Meaning "to exhibit the qualities of laser light." Of US origin.

e.g., If we put the giggleplex in with the space bats, the hyper-crystal starts to lase.

submitted by Coofer Cat - (www)

laser it - Hurry up!

e.g., If you dont laser it, stoop, we won't make it to the party.

submitted by jill michel

lass reunion - What you have when the class members from an all-girls school get together for a reunion. ... Or, a class reunion that occurs after all the males in the class have died.

e.g., MB: "Jay, do you think you'll be coming to our 70th anniversary class reunion next year?" Jay: "Not if you-know-who will be there. Ugh, he really turned into a creep, didn't he?" MB: "No, he didn't. You're wrong about that." Jay: "C'mon. Surely you're not going to tell me you don't agree with me that he's a creep." MB: "Oh, he's a creep all right. But he didn't 'turn into a creep.' He's always been a creep. You just didn't notice it before." Jay: "Ah, I see your point." MB: "You do realize, don't you that he's somehow managed to outlive all the other boys in our class. Hard to believe, given all the things he had wrong with him at our 60th: two widowmaker heart attacks, diabetes, prostate cancer, skin cancer, colon cancer--" Jay: "He has colon cancer? I didn't know that. When was he diagnosed with it?" MB: "Sometime between when we saw him in October and Thanksgiving." Jay: "He didn't tell me." MB: "Well, he didn't tell _me_ until mid-March, right before our Easter weekend reunion. He said he tried to tell you several times, but you wouldn't talk to him anymore. Not after he sent me that stupid gag e-mail, the one that made me think you were seriously ill. I was ready to kill him when he told me 'dasypygal' meant having hair-covered buttocks. ... I wouldn't have found out either, but there was no one else he could talk to. And he made me swear on a Bible -- he actually insisted that I use my family Bible -- that I wouldn't tell you until after he was dead -- or until our 70th reunion. I think we're close enough now that he won't get mad at me. ... You do realize that after he dies, what we'll be having is lass reunions?

submitted by Walter Dejanym - (www)

last in space - The end of Man's sojourn on Earth, gone to healthier times and spaces.

e.g., He or she who is last in space, be sure to activate all the reterriform units.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

last nerve - What you "get on" of your teacher, parent, boss, or other authority figure when you're being a juvenile pest.

e.g., Mrs. Brock lowered her horn-rimmed glasses on her snout, peered over the top and wryly snapped, "Steve, you are about to get on my last nerve."

submitted by steve zihlavsky

last rights - The final appeal before the death penalty is carried out.

e.g., Soon after her last rights are exercised, last rites are administered to murderers.

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

last wrongs - Erroneous sacrament.

e.g., A priest giving Last Rites to non-Catholics is actually giving Last Wrongs.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

lastard - Those people who leave a tiny bit of milk in the bag just to annoy you and make you fill it up again. Lactose+bastard.

e.g., Where'd all the milk go? I bet it was Bill, that lastard.

submitted by Ian Macdonald

lastday - Used by my grandson instead of yesterday as he seem to understand that concept better.

e.g., I went swimming lastday. Can I go again today?

submitted by Julia Pate

lastel - To describe something that will last a long time, or a sport participant with no talent.

e.g., 1. Don't sweat it. That thing's lastel. 2. He'll never make it, he's way too lastel.

submitted by DrewT

lasterday - Coined by my daughter Jamie at age 3. Means somewhere between last week and yesterday. See lastertimeago. (ED. Or, more generally, any day before today -- but usually two or more days ago.)

e.g., Can we go to Chuckie Cheese like we did lasterday? | Some idiot set up a robot lasterday that spams the pd. Rather than delete this trash one entry at a time, I'm going to find a way to make use of at least some of it. Maybe for some Australish-ish.

submitted by chris gifuni

lastertimeago - My daughter, Sarah, made this up when she was about 2-1/2. She couldn't seem to get "last time" or "a long time ago" or "yesterday" so she created this awesome word.

e.g., Do you remember lastertimeago when we saw Grandma?

submitted by Sam Chapman

lasvaygan - (las-vaygen) noun - someone who has won money in Las Vegas; someone who has been successful in Las Vegas.

e.g., I have always heard stories of lasvaygans, and they encourage me to try my own luck in Las Vegas.

submitted by Miss McCann

late - See you later. Usually reserved for bro's and surfer-types.

e.g., I'll be by in the morning to pick up my board--late!

submitted by Margaret

late o'clockers - Those who are perpetually late -- to the point that if they arrived anywhere on time, it would shock everyone.

e.g., Simon is at the top of my list as a late o'clocker. I told him to be here at seven o'clock. It's seven forty-five, and he still hasn't shown up

submitted by Paul

lateover - (n.) a children's social event, like a sleepover, but when the children are really too young to be staying over at someone else's house---so they get to play until they're practically asleep standing up, and then they go home.

e.g., "They want to have a sleepover?! But they're only four!" "So let'em have a lateover. They can stay until 11 or so, and then I'll bring him home."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

laterosexual - One who always makes love in a sideways position.

e.g., He found that her laterosexual demands were anatomically impossible for him to meet.

submitted by Steve McDonald

laters - An English farewell term.

e.g., I'm going, laters.

submitted by kandy korner

latin lover - Someone or something that you love in a cute, kinda fake way (does not have to have Latin roots).

e.g., I know. He's awesome. He's my latin lover.

submitted by Cassie

latrine - (Pronounced LAY-trine (rhymes with BAY-brine) or LAH-treen (rhymes with STRAW-green); adj.) 1. Of or pertaining to latrines; 2. Of or pertaining to toilets or sewers; 3. Rather more disgustingly, of or pertaining to the flushable contents of toilets and sewage in general. [A resyllabification of_latrine_.]

e.g., "We think he dumped the crack down the toilet, Sarge." "Yeah, but he didn't flush it." "Bleh. You mean it's mixed in with the ... with that?" "Yup. I guess we'll have to ... um ... bag it for the lab." "Bleh! CSI's not gonna be happy with a bag of poopy water." "Don't tell'em that: tell them it's ... latrine evidence." | "Mr. Mayor: next year's capital expenditures must be augmented for the sewer system." "Ah, yes, the latrine concerns of municipal government." | "So he's just out of OCS?" "Well, sorta: he's out as a 3rd Lieutenant." "Why is he making us clean the toilets again?" "I don't know, maybe we should call him the latrine lieutenant."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

latron - Lateron. Used when parting ways.

e.g., Catcha latron, Mary.

submitted by Stephen

latron dutrex - "Later on, dude." Plural, Dutreces.

e.g., "See you later." "Latron, Dutrex."

submitted by saladin

latte - Later.

e.g., I gotta go, I'll see you latte.

submitted by Baggyjeans

laughs - Hilariously funny.

e.g., That movie was laughs.

submitted by BigAssFries

laundry balls - Touted as an earth-friendly alternative to clothes washing detgergents, laundry balls could be little more than an expensive hoax. How good can they be if multi-level marketer Amway wasn't willing to sell them? (ED. The things you run across when you're looking for the origin of phrases such as balls out and balls against the wall.)

e.g., "What do you know about those plastic ion laundry balls that supposedly replace detergent?" Cecil Adams was not kind in his answer . . . 11 years ago. Sellers have been taken to task by state consumer protection agencies -- one of which determined that the laundry balls contained dyed water. That would hardly be space age technology, would it?

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

laundry event horizon - The state after which there is no longer any way to avoid doing laundry.

e.g., Jockeys are already inside out, t-shirt backwards and inside out, laundry pile has crept out into the hallway. I've just passed the Laundry Event Horizon.

submitted by Geo - (www)

laurelandhardyannual - A plant that is amusingly unfortunate, yet enduring. Once planted, it attempts to grow every year.

e.g., My laurelandhardyannuals always produce such a pathetic show of colour, but they never quite seem to give up and die off.

submitted by Hooty McBob

laurencesque - Relating to long, black, Renaissance dresses.

e.g., Your laurencesque attire remind me of the Renaissance Faire.

submitted by Judith A.

lavote - To ignore someone in a rude manner.

e.g., Just lavote him and he'll leave you alone.

submitted by amillia

laweba - Lack of Ambition With Extra Bad Attitude.

e.g., That Chris ain't right, she's suffering from laweba.

submitted by Kingtool - (www)

lawki - Life As We Know It.

e.g., Are hydrocarbons a requirement of LAWKI, or could such life be silicon-based?

submitted by David Kraut

lawn guy land - Landscaper's heaven.

e.g., Lawn Guy Land is where we have more landscapers than residents (and most are undocumented illegal aliens).

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

lawnatic - A person who devotes an insane amount of time, money, or other resources to the appearance of his or her lawn.

e.g., Yeah, the lake is completely grown over with algae because of all the lawnatics in the subdivision up the hill.

submitted by Hal Colombo

lawndry - Time consuming, repetitive outdoor work.

e.g., Like "doing the laundry," which requires collecting the dirty clothes, sorting, then putting each load in the washing machine; transferring the wash to the drier; then folding the clean clothes and putting them away, each and every week(!), the "lawndry" entails the same, dull, repetitive, time killing chores for the outdoors of a homeowner. Maybe it's time to move to an apartment or a condo?

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

lawnin' - When you mow the grass.

e.g., Dad, that looks like great lawnin' you're doing.

submitted by Anna - (www)

lawnmoaner - Someone who constantly complains while mowing the lawn.

e.g., She could have finished mowing the lawn by now if she wasn't complaining and dragging her heels. She's a lawnmoaner.

submitted by duncan

lawrph - Somewhere between a laugh and a harrumph, but definitely not a guffaw or a chortle.

e.g., Daryl's whit was dry, somewhat acerbic and a tad sarcastic, so it was with subtle irony that I wryly lawrphed at his jokes.

submitted by Dylon Whyte - (www)

laws - Religious term.

e.g., Laws a mussy. Despite having been caught prevaricating, he continued to varicate.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

laws of irony - Laws so solid they almost rank up there with Newton's Law of Gravity in infalliblity. Though plural, the laws of irony dictate one point -- that whoever is cocky about something or some situation will soon be humiliated in some way relating to pride.

e.g., I saw the laws of irony at work yesterday when Chris bragged about her gracefulness and then tripped over a chair and fell down the stairs.

submitted by Firestorm

lawsweet - A lawsuit the one suing hopes will result in a sweet payoff for her. Multiple lawsuits filed concurrently would be lawsuites.


Marty: What do you think the chances are that Thomas Eric Duncan's
family will file a lawsweet against the Dallas hospital he died in?

Mac: Who's Thomas -- what? Eric? -- Duncan?

Marty: The Liberian national who came to the U.S. from Africa carrying the
Ebola virus.

Mac: Riiight. With Jesse Jackson on the scene to charge racism? I'd say 100%.

Lillith: You think the hospital's staff is racist?

Mac: Doesn't matter. The hospital turned away a guy who was deathly ill and sent him home. The lawsweet will be for malpractice. I've had enough experience with doctors, nurses, hospitals, and nursing homes to know how many mistakes get made. Way, way too many.

Lillith: They'd have a better chance of winning a jackpot payoff if their lawsweet was anywhere else but Texas.

Marty & Mac, at the same time: Tru dat.

Mac: Jinx, you owe me a coke.

submitted by lawsuite - (www)

lawt - Bye, see you later, etc.--especially when making a hasty retreat. Rhymes with fought.

e.g., "Hey, do you remember that party Eric threw last year?" "Oh yeah, that was the one I woke up afterwards next to your sis...lawt!"

submitted by jenna

lax - Lacrosse.

e.g., "Ignacio Adriasola, an art history graduate student, had a sign taped to his shirt: 'It isn't what Duke has, but what it lax,' using the shorthand word for lacrosse." (News & Observer.)

submitted by HD Fowler

lax - To relax, kick back, chill out.

e.g., I'm gonna go and lax for a while.

submitted by Scarlett

lax - A hillbilly expression of enjoyment.

e.g., Ah shure lax these wurds.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

laxadated - Relaxed, laid back, lazy.

e.g., I'm so laxadated I can't even bother to punctuate this sentence properly. I hope the editor does it for me.

submitted by Barbara T

lay der hosen - In Penn-Sylvania Dutch country, it's how they stretch out the waterhosen ein fire outten to make.

e.g., First you lay der hosen, then you squirt the flames you've chosen.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

lay down the law - Take control of a situation, occasionally through use of physical force.

e.g., Back in high school, whenever a fight broke out, the principal would show up and lay down the law.

submitted by ditnis

lay-level - (adj.) Written for the laity, that is, the ordinary person, rather than containing profession-specific jargon such as legalese or medi-speak.

e.g., "I can't understand this document at all. Can anyone here read Engineer-lingo?" "Oh, no need, sir: we've prepared a lay-level IS a bit longer, though." "Oh, good, I think."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

layer 8 - The OSI Networking model goes to Layer 7, application, the program the end user is running. Layer 8, the next layer, is the end user. This commonly refers to an end user not knowing what she is doing.

e.g., His computer is experiencing a Layer 8 issue.

submitted by Ross Towbin - (www)

lazearchy - A system of government whereby the world ruled by laziness.

e.g., World peace would be easy in a lazearchy; everybody would be too lazy to fight. The solution to all our problems lies in laziness, as long as we're too lazy to look for it anywhere else.

submitted by Sam G

lazy ketchup - The ketchup in restaurants that is hesitant to leave its bottle.

e.g., I'd have returned from my lunch break sooner, if it weren't for that lazy ketchup.

submitted by Harold R. McPhillips

lazy-man load - A load that is too heavy and large for the carrier to bear, mostly made so that the carrier can make fewer trips.

e.g., Jeanette said in fear, "Mike, put some of those cases back. It's dangerous to carry a lazy-man load down stairs."

submitted by Ian Faynik

lbd - Lesbian By Default. A physically unattractive woman with no other options than lesbianism.

e.g., She hasn't had a date in a while. I'm thinking she'll be LBD by New Year's Eve.

submitted by ADB

lbm - Little Bitch Man. Used to describe a particularly meek and sheepish male.

e.g., Watch yourself LBM. You're about to enter a world of hurt.

submitted by needfortweed

lbst - A hairstyle, long in back short on top. Aka mullet.

e.g., That guy has the longest LBST I've ever seen. He's cooler than Billy Ray Cyrus.

submitted by Heidi Groth

lcf - Looking Cool Factor.

e.g., What the hell did you do that for? It's all about the LCF.

submitted by Neonnoir

lead argument - Gunfight.

e.g., The poker players got into a lead argument.

submitted by Deacon

lead sled - Hot rod slang. In the days of yore, body work was done with lead, instead of the plastic body filler that is used today. Highly modified cars had to use a ton of lead, on top of the already excessive weight.

e.g., That '50 Merc' is all done up -- chopped, channeled, frenched -- hell of a nice Lead Sled.

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

leadership - The ship leading the convoy.

e.g., "Which ship will the President be on?" "The leadership, of course."

submitted by HD

leaf blower - A "leaf blower" holds a noisy gasoline-engine-based material movement system in his hand, and the philosophic position that "As soon as the leaves are not in my yard, they no longer exist" in his head.

e.g., Josh is the biggest leaf blower in our office. As soon as a request hits his desk, he figures out how to make it somebody else's problem. Then he plays video games until he nods off.

submitted by Mark Near

leafity - (LEEF-it-ee; n.) 1. The quality or state of a plant or tree's being covered with leaves; by extension, 2. a. summer: that time of year characterized by the presence of leaves on deciduous plants and trees, also b. spring: that time of year characterized by the appearance of new leaves. 2. c. autumn: that time of year characterized by carpets and piles of dead leaves everywhere.

e.g., Shade is the result of a tree's healthy leafity. | Leafity is so hot that one must seek shade in order to avoid dehydration. | After a long winter, one must rejoice in leafity.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

leake - Take a leak in a lake and you have a leake.

e.g., Lake Superior just became Leake Superior, Sam.

submitted by HD Fowler

leaker - A person who is incompetent. Someone who always seems to make mistakes. A loser.

e.g., That Chris ... what a leaker. He can never do anything right.

submitted by Rick Kridler

lean - A synonym for the word "cool," used by hipsters in the Ottawa area.

e.g., Rich: You see that 70s rock revival band at Stuggy's last night? Paul: Yeah, they were lean.

submitted by natmac

leanable - That which can be leaned on.

e.g., The back of this sofa is so leanable.

submitted by Gav

leanular - To lean in a funny way, to the point of being ridiculous.

e.g., 1. That house is all leanular. 2. He hit the chimney with the 1956 Studebacker, so now it's all leanular.

submitted by Peter Bonzani Jr.

learify - (Rhymes with HERE-if-pie; v.) (1.) To reduce somebody to abject penury and hopelessness in one fell swoop, especially someone who had been wealthy, important, or celebrated (or thought themselves to be wealthy, important, or celebrated), especially where the person (um) abjected relied upon your support; (2.) To betray the trust of one's parent(s), siblings, other family members, friends, partners, vel cet., resulting in severe (sometimes catastrophic) consequences; (3.) To renege on an agreement, promise, or contract, again, especially where the breach causes serious repercussions for the nonbreaching party; (4.) To flatter (sometimes obsequiously), only to later turn against a somebody you've fooled (oftentimes a pompous flattery-monger (but hey, treachery is treachery)). [From Shakespeare's King Lear, who demanded that his three daughters (Goneril, Regan, and Cordelia) to profess undying love and obedience to him before officially granting them the three portions of his kingdom.] (cf. "Gonerillify," "Reganate," and "Cordeal.")

e.g., Ricole strung Max along, telling him that she loved him, enough (so she implied) to marry him after graduation. Max had been badly disfigured when he was a child, so we all thought very highly of her. But, at graduation, she admitted it was all a joke that she and her friends had concocted during the previous holidays and that she wanted nothing to do with a "cripple," none of us could believe anyone could be so cruel. We had to put poor Max under suicide watch, and we got his money back on the $10K diamond ring before he could throw it in the river. And Ricole, the filthy little Learifying harridan---and her high-school friends: all the popular girls---they ended up leaving town.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

learjet lefties - Politically liberal rich persons who criticise the capitalist system that they themselves exploit to accumulate their wealth.

e.g., Did you hear how those Learjet lefties Ted Turner and Bono who want to write off Third World debt?

submitted by Tim Hickey

learnagogy - The art of learning, or the process of learning. Of course we have words and phrases that are similar such as cognition, learning theory, study habits, study skills and learning strategy, but if Malcolm Knowles can popularize the term "andragogy," then why can't I keep going with a related word that speaks to the responsibility for the learning process to belong to the individual who is seeking and retaining the knowledge? If andragogy is offered as an alternative to pedagogy, then why can't "learnagogy"be offered as an alternative as well? As far as I'm concerned, we don't have enough words to describe this process. So I hereby on, and from this day forward, will refer to the art and joy of learning by using the term learnagogy.

e.g., The young programmer was pleased with his learnagogy, so he composed a blog entry describing how he mastered the process on his own.

submitted by Sandy Mills-Alford - (www)

learning computers - College students who do nothing but learn, i.e.. are only concerned with getting a good job. They don't have any fun. Northwestern students are a good example of this. It's also a good thing to yell out the window at people. It comes from _Terminator 2_. Arnold says it in the movie.

e.g., B: These guys don't do anything for fun. E: Yeah, what a bunch of learning computers.

submitted by Chewbaccalypse

leather hat band - Emphasizing extremly snug fitting garments.

e.g., I think I've put on weight--this shirt is tighter than a leather hat band.

submitted by Vince Edward Estepp

leathered - Drunk, stoned.

e.g., I have been in the pub all day. I'm leathered.

submitted by Kim

leatherette - A biker chick.

e.g., I saw a biker with a leatherette on the back of his bike.

submitted by Kristen - (www)

leaverright - Anything found that is worthless.

e.g., I picked up this worthless rock and decided to leaverright where I found it.

submitted by tim mcilwraith

lebowski - Synonym for the ultimate slacker. From the slacker protagonist in the Coen Brothers film _The Great Lebowski_.

e.g., I was going to take the summer job, but I decided to do a lebowski instead.

submitted by Joel Parker

lecherette - A woman with strong sexual desires. A female counterpart to a lecher, used to refer to a man. We tend to think of lechers has having this meaning: "If you describe a man as a lecher, you disapprove of him because you think he behaves towards women in a way which shows he is only interested in them sexually. ... Synonyms: womanizer, seducer, rake, Don Juan." But some dictionaries settle for defining a lecher simply as a "man with strong sexual desires." Which not necessarily a bad thing. {Duplicate.} {ED. Previously entered from the back-end using me editor's account. Inverted the name and word fields. Corrected here.} (ED

e.g., If you're a lecher, you're fortunate if you've managed to find a lecherette to be your significant other. Lechers should all be so lucky.

submitted by lillith

leck - To strain the upper spine and neck upwards in order to howl at the full moon.

e.g., TJ found the woods and their environs rather disconcerting, and released all the pent up pressure by lecking in the manner of a wolf and howling at the Moon

submitted by Miles Gavin

lectursize - An exposition of a given topic combined with a hands on exercise and presented to an audience or class.

e.g., The lecturcize on typography would have been more effective if we'd been asked to compare semi-sans serif faces in additon to the sans serif.

submitted by John Upchurch

led head - A Led Zeppelin enthusiast.

e.g., That goofball's listened to "In My Time of Dying" four times in a row. Clearly a led head.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

lede - Journalist slang for "lead" -- i.e., the first sentence of a news story.

e.g., The lede is nice, but by the third graf things start to slow down. From Ken Layne's warblog.

submitted by Slithy Tove - (www)

ledge - Short for legend

e.g., Commentator, "He shoots, he scores. He's a living ledge."

submitted by darrell milton

ledgerdeheel - "Light-heeled pranks. . . . A play on the word legerdemain, which literally means 'light of hand,' used to refer to sleight of hand or trickery and deception. In the citation above, legerdeheel refers specifically to infidelity, not a laughing matter. Except for the times that it is.  
"If being light of hands is prestidigitation, then being light of heel must be prestipeditation. Perhaps meaning that you can sneak off somewhere else without being noticed, as if by magic. Or maybe it means you can do card tricks with your feet."

e.g., If you have your wits about you, you won't let her get away with half of what you've accumulated during your marriage. While you practiced medicine, Chris practiced ledgerdeheels. And, here in Texas, that's enough to keep her from getting her mitts on your stuff.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

leditor - A letter to the editor.

e.g., I was so angered by the news article, I dashed off a scathing missive to the Times. Now ilet's see if they'll publish my leditor.

submitted by natalie - (www)

lee marvin, marvin - Starvin'--only related when you're very hungry for food.

e.g., I'm Lee Marvin, gotta get me some food.

submitted by Gav

leech - Someone who does little or no work, yet claims responsibility for the final product. To do little or no work and claim responsibility for the final product.

e.g., That leech stole my science grade. OR That guy leeched an A off me.

submitted by Scott

leeismic - Following all the religions at once.

e.g., D'you think Lee's leeismic.

submitted by leeleebigc

leet - Internet slang for elite

e.g., That's a leet toaster you got.

submitted by Aaron Wilde

leetspeak - Internet shorthand language. It came to be the hacker term for a collection of "emoticons," phonetic shortcuts, acronyms and abbreviations. When IRCchat and eventually AOL Instant Messenger came to dominate teen life (as well as cellphone text messaging in Europe and Asia), l33tspeak gradually became (and is becoming) a staple of teen vernacular. L33Tspeak (abreviation leet) comes from "l33t hax0r," a common term from the early days of the phenomenon when this practice was mostly employed by hackers on slow, multi-user Unix systems -- and each keystroke was precious. A "l33t hax0r" is an "elite hacker." "R U wurEd dat d eng lngwij wil bcum cor^ted unrEdabl?" translated becomes "Are you worried that the english language will become corrupted and unreadable?"

e.g., The PseudoDictionary seldom accepts leetspeak entries … partly because such entries are unreadable and unintelligible to our geezer editors. Nota bene: All of our editors are geezers. If not now, later.

submitted by Teri

left - Not right. Mentally off balance.

e.g., Fowler: Chris is left. Jim: No, he's right over there, playing pool. See? Fowler: I mean he's not right mentally.

submitted by HD Fowler

left - To become extremely dissappointed, upset, or angry with someone or about something. As in to be the opposite of "right."

e.g., You wrecked Sarah's car. She's gonna go left.

submitted by Brian Thompson

left-handed - Doing something in a strange way.

e.g., I figured out a left-handed way of fixing my CD player. I bought another one just like it at the store, then put my broken one in the box and returned it the next day. (We've all done it, but we're not proud of it.)

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

left-handed screwdriver - A thing we used to make freshmen go down and ask for from the machine shop to test their stupidity. Used now to describe a new product that performs the same basic function as the old product, but has a useless marketing feature.

e.g., Wow, the new Ziploc bags have a yellow and blue zip stripe . . . sounds like nothing more than a left-handed screwdriver. (Well actually, there is a function: the stripe turns green so you can tell the bag is sealed. Not a biggie, but it's useful.)

submitted by Carlos Coutinho

leftahydagonal - The direction behind you to the left.

e.g., The ladder was leftagydagonal to his position in the room.

submitted by Jared - (www)

lefter - Farther to the left.

e.g., The bank is lefter than the grocery store.

submitted by Katie

lefticate - Indicate left. Righticate, too.

e.g., Lefticate and turn left at the next traffic light.

submitted by Osher Goldman

leftoveritis - The condition of being tired of eating leftovers. Usually occurs around major holidays, such as Thanksgiving (in US) and Christmas.

e.g., Hal: What's to eat tonight, dear? Sal: Turkey tetrazinni. Yum? Hal: Aaaaaaaargh! No! Sal: Sounds like leftoveritis to me. Don't worry. We'll go to 3rd Street Pizza instead.

submitted by Paul

leftunder - A leftover of a dish made from roadkill

e.g., Mmmmmm-mmmm, Aunt B., these possum leftunders is somethin' special.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

leg fingers - Toes.

e.g., Grab my slippers, would you? My leg fingers are colder than a mofo.

submitted by Lord Highbrow of Arachnopod

leg of yam - Any food or drink that would be acceptable to a vegetarian or vegan. Sounds good, tastes good, and has nothing to do with the consumption of poor dead animals. (Yam, in this instance, has nothing to do with a ground vegetable; it is a modification of the Latin American pronunciation of llama: leg of llama would also be an unlikely thing to eat.)

e.g., I'd rather die than eat a pig or chew on a cow. It's got to be leg of yam, which can be prepared in many delicious ways. Eating meat is barbaric and cruel, not to say possibly unhealthy and very hard on the pocket book. Man is designed to eat tasty vegetation of many sorts, not the bloody flesh of murdered creatures. Eat right, act right, feel right, do right.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

leg-end - Someone who believes in her own legendary status, but for all intents and purposes is a dimwit.

e.g., A: I heard Chris slept with two supermodels last night. B: Lies. That leg-end couldn't make it with a circus midget.

submitted by wnpxnff

legaleyes - To see the meaning of a legal matter.

e.g., He was able to legaleyes the contract on the cell phone.

submitted by Jim

legalez - All galez following the strict regulations of the Free Galez Foundation (FGF). See also

e.g., Bill: Legalize the plant. Ted: Are you sure this galez is legalez?

submitted by Daniel Suttter - (www)

legger - A downpour or rainstorm that makes you run for shelter

e.g., It's a real legger out there. I'm drenched.

submitted by Jeff Jorgensen

legger - Quick getaway. From "to leg it."

e.g., I'd recommend doing a legger before the cops come, Chris. Another felony conviction and they'll put you away for life. Remember, we've got Baume's Rush laws in this states. Three felony convictions and you go in for life, no parole.

submitted by Mick - (www)

leghumper - One who tends to be "cutesy," or overly playful.

e.g., Why won't that leghumper stop making up overly cute words?

submitted by John

legions - Banner patriotic donation amount.

e.g., I pledge a legions to the flag. (Common children's misconception.)

submitted by S., Berliner, III - (www)

legitly - Shorter form of "legitimately." Meaning correct, real, actual, true. Legitely.

e.g., That was a legitly good excuse.

submitted by katie

legitmatic - Existing independent of doubt or debate.

e.g., He suggested I kill her, but it wasn't a legitmatic option.

submitted by Lance

legless - In response to an Aussie's saying she was "tanked" and "legless." Quite simply, she was admitting she was slightly intoxicated, but having fun. See also: tanked.

e.g., Maaaaaaaaaate, I'm legless, hey.

submitted by Damien

legoides - (lay-GOI-deez; n.) Something made of legos or lego clones. (Adjectival form "legoidean": made of legos vel cet.) [

e.g., I've seen some really amazing legoides in my time, but a legoidean model of the Hindenburg disaster has got to win a monument or something.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

legtronix - A specialized application of electronics, in this case toward the use and construction of the artifical leg, and by extension to all the other artificial appendages, human, robotic, android, extraterrestrial.

e.g., Through the specialized science of legtronix, we now have lame who walk, hands that talk, feet that rock.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

leibniz - To come up with an idea or invention that already exists. From Gottfried Leibniz, the man who invented calculus years after Isaac Newton.

e.g., That whole ripped pants thing? I invented it, or at least I leibnized it.

submitted by Paul Amore

leisiate - To be at leisure.

e.g., We are going to our beach house with friends to leisiate for the weekend. | This weekend we are going to leisiate for a while and then do some food shopping. | Best vacation ever. We got on the cruise and spent the next seven days leisiating to our hearts content. | The resort provides everything you would need to leisiate for days on end

submitted by Jason Lepsis - (www)

lekker - Good, positive, cool, sweet, phat.

e.g., That Corvette is a lekker car. (This is actually an Afrikaans word which means the above. Many South Africans use it in English conversations.)

submitted by Paul Hickernell

lemahaf - Southern-fried urbonics for "eleven-and-a-half."

e.g., Hey, I been shorted. My carton of aigs only has lemahaf.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

leman - Old Scots for "lover."

e.g., She said he was her leman back in Glasgow.

submitted by Bruce Jewett

lembas - From "The Lord of the Rings." Elven way bread known for its ability to feed a person for a day with one piece. I use it to describe any overly dense, heavy, or stodgey baked good.

e.g., I think I will pass on your mom's Christmas lembas this year.

submitted by Patrick

lemming - Blindly or heedlessly repeating the actions or words of another.

e.g., As a result of consuming a six-pack of beer each and lemming a Monday night broadcast of wrestling, Eddie, Dwayne, Jerry, and Harold all ended up in the emergency room's trauma unit.

submitted by Lisa

lemming juice - Like lemon juice except it comes from lemmings. A new product to help the lemming population stay managably non-suicidal.

e.g., Is that freshly squeezed lemming juice in the lemmingade or bottled?

submitted by steve zihlavsky

lemmingly - Acting like a lemming, or "acting before thinking."

e.g., I lemmingly wrapped my car around a telephone pole.

submitted by Minkus

lemon - Used to describe any fanwork which is written solely to describe various sexual activities. Noted for their use of extreme hyperbole and atrocious grammar and spelling.

e.g., Glad Mom wasn't in the room when I was reading that lemon; otherwise, she'd never let me on the internet again.

submitted by keyla

lemon curry - Said out of nowhere as a response to something else, seemingly out of nowhere.

e.g., Frick: Credit card. Frack: Lemon curry.

submitted by BigAssFries

lemon shimmae, kiwi schnazz - Usually used together, describing two really hot cute amazing godess girls.

e.g., Hey, Matt, look over to the left. Kiwi ShnazZ and Lemon Shimmae headed our way!"

submitted by Katie smit

lempcke - Doing something stupid for a tiny reward or no reward at all. A person doing a stupid act.

e.g., A. I'll give you a nickel to suck my toe. B. No, I'm not doing a lempcke. OR Hey, that's a good stunt for a reality-based TV show. You could make a fool of yourself in front of millions. Then everyone would know what a lempcke you are.

submitted by DeBuG

leng - To snack or munch.

e.g., All you did all day was watch TV and leng.

submitted by aldwin oliveros

lengthly - Common mispronouciation of "lengthy" or "lengthily."

e.g., I was bored out of my head during that lengthly meeting.

submitted by chris gifuni

lennon moment - Describing a reaction to a situation, be it violent, creative, etc.

e.g., He said something that was so stupid I had to get him back with something that would make him cry. It was a real Lennon moment.

submitted by Nefret

lennonite - One who follows John Lennon and many of his beliefs. Superior to being simply a fan.

e.g., Not only does Brad own every Lennon album, he wrote the President and told him to give peace a chance. He's such a Lennonite.

submitted by Tara DellaFranzia - (www)

leo - Lower Earth Orbit. When someone blows her top, she is said to go LEO.

e.g., When I told Bob I'd kissed his girl, he went LEO.

submitted by qnarf

leohemerism - (lee-oh-HEE-mer-iz-m; n.) 1. The belief that not getting what one prays for proves that God does not exist; 2. By extension, the belief that God's nonsusceptibility to experimental proof demonstrates his nonexistence (although I can't prove by experimentation that my sister exists, since she doesn't hold still long enough for me to show her to anybody). (From the Greek λεον ήμερης [leon hemeres] "tame lion": from C.S. Lewis's analogy of people thinking of God as a tame lion who performs upon command, and then cease to believe in him at all when he doesn't do as we ask (demand).) "Leohemerist"---a person who believes in leohemerism; "Leohemic" or "Leohemeric"---of or pertaining to leohemerism or leohemerists.

e.g., "I asked God over and over to cure George's cancer, but he didn't do it." "I once asked my history professor to tell me the answers to a midterm, but he wouldn't do it either." "Isn't George a little more important than a stupid midterm?!---Why wouldn't God save George? He either won't, which is mean, or he can't, which means he's not God." "That's illogical ... it's leohemerism: should I stop believing in my history teacher?"

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lepercon - A con which relies on a pseudoleper playing a key role. From the TV series Monk, episode "Mr Monk and the Leper."

e.g., The lepercon case was so full of holes it could have been solved by GroovyLady.

submitted by HD Fowler

lepine - Characteristic of or resembling a rabbit. Fast or timid.

e.g., The way she was sampling at the snacks was more lepine than graceful.

submitted by Scott Stephens

leptic - Someone who posesses an extreme lack of competence at any task whatsoever.

e.g., Keith, you leptic, next time turn the saw *off* before you try to clean the blade.

submitted by Keith Hudgins

leroy - A sneeze that refuses to come out.

e.g., I was trying to answer his questions but I was stuck with leroy and I couldn't talk.

submitted by alex

lerpy - Used to describe a really tall, skinny guy who tends to look geeky and walks like Shaggy from "Scooby Doo."

e.g., That guy sure is lerpy.

submitted by Laura Centric

lerpy - Gangly and ungraceful; all legs and elbows. Especially used to describe prepubescent males at that awkward, clumsy stage where they're always bumping into stuff.

e.g., Is that little Josh? Boy, I remember him as a chubby little kid; now he's all stretched out and lerpy.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lert - A person who is very watchful all around her. Informed or perhaps nosy.

e.g., Don't tell me any secrets around Bob. He's a lert.

submitted by Henry Tagisson

les binos | binos - Variation on the word lesbian, used by our group of friends. (ED. This seems friendly enough. But what the hell do I know? I'm a geezerette, but not of the les binos variety.)

e.g., She's binos. Ah, les binos you say. | Is she binos? Yes, les binos.

submitted by Emma Carter

lesbiannoyed - What she is when a woman is angry at her boyfriend and proclaims "she wishes she were a lesbian so she wouldn't have to deal with men."

e.g., Beth was often lesbiannoyed with Todd and his buddies' "fart jokes."

submitted by Gina Yancey

lesbilly - She and her special girlfriend both live in the hills, happy and doing their own thing: they can sing, they can dance, they do a little farming and don't need no man nohow for nothin', thankee kinely.

e.g., I done see'd Bonnie and Butch, our sweet local lesbilly couple, down to the general store last evening an' gave them a invite over to the grange get together, which they duly accepted an' trotted off then to shoe their horse.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

lesbionage - The practice of using lesbian agents to spy on other lesbians for data collection, etc.

e.g., The only way we can get inside that lesbian organization is through lesbionage. Ask your sister if she'll help.

submitted by #1 stunna

lesbionic - The state of being lesbian -- particularly if electronic devices are involved.

e.g., My desktop computer was being lesbionic, so I unplugged it.

submitted by Ally

lesbolshevik - (n., adj.) feminist.

e.g., Too many lesbolsheviks are occupying seats of power in Washington to suit me.

submitted by Karl Jahn - (www)

lesionable drought - A drought that's so severe that the earth is extremely dry and cracked, looking as though it might have been caused by an earthquake.

e.g., One very hot summer in the 1940s we experienced a lesionable drought so bad that we had to be careful not to fall into the cracks.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

lesionnaire - Soldier in a military force that uses biological weaponry.

e.g., Everyone's coming down with smallpox. I think we've been attacked by a lesionnaire. ('Tis the season for a lesion?)

submitted by Adam Browne

leskoesque - (adj.) Of or pertaining to whimsical, yet incisive and socially relevant puns (that is, puns everyone groans at, i.e., puns everyone repeats at every opportunity. [From Charlie Lesko, a fellow contributor to the PseudoDictionary, whose punning entries always make me . . . well, laugh or wince (depending on the punning commentary's aim). I just thought such wit deserved a memorial.]

e.g., The Leskoesque puns in the PseudoDictionary could be gathered together as a book of political commentary and social satire. It'd probably do some real good in a jaded and fairly apathetic culture.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lesnerize - "It represents the ultimate fear of not knowing what it is you need to avoid doing. Well, I'm pretty confident that, whatever the cultural differences between me and the Korean administration and clientele at my new school, I'm not lesnerizing."  
Typical Sheckley stories include "Bad Medicine" (in which a man is mistakenly treated by a psychotherapy machine intended for Martians), "Protection" (whose protagonist is warned of deadly danger unless he avoids the common activity of "lesnerizing," a word whose meaning is not explained), and "The Accountant" (in which a family of wizards learns that their son has been taken from them by a more sinister trade -- accountancy).


"Whatever you do, don't Lesnerize!" |

"The trouble is, I don't have any idea what lesnerizing might be. A common human action, the derg had said. Well, for the time, I'm avoiding as many actions as possible.

"I've caught up on some back sleep and nothing happened, so that's not lesnerizing. I went out and bought food, paid for it, cooked it, ate it. That wasn't lesnerizing. I wrote this report. That wasn't lesnerizing.

"I'll come out of this yet.

"I'm going to catch a nap. I think I have a cold coming on. Now I have to sneeze.

"The End

"© 1956 by Robert Sheckley. First published in Galaxy, April 1956." |

"Well, that was an odd one. It made me think about some of the ridiculous warning labels you sometimes see. Am I to take it from the ending that lesnerizing is the same thing as sneezing?" |

"I have this peculiar fear of doing something I shouldn't be doing -- could I be lesnerizing?" "No. It's just that you're married now. Such fear is normal for a newly married man." |

"The protagonist of 'Protection' is reassured that he is safe, unless of course he dares to lesnerize, but no one will tell him what that constitutes. Here is a theme that resonates in the sf community, rich as it is in socially challenged types who never know when they'll be punished for violating unspoken rules everyone else is aware of. I myself often fear that I am about to lesnerize, or have already done so. (Another sf treatment of this theme appears in Greg Egan's Distress, whose narrator finds himself in the Kafkaesque position of being kicked out of a Relationship for two crimes, the second of which is ignorance of the first.)" |

"Contact with the derg has also opened the narrator up to other dangers. There’s the gamper, the grailers, the feegs, the leeps, which can be warded off with things like mistletoe and graveyard mold and keeping the closet door closed, but and worst of all, the thrang, which can only be eliminated if the narrator does not lesnerize. Problem is, the thrang gets the derg before it can define lesnerize, so the narrator is left alone, his actions reduced to eating and sleeping, afraid that anything more ambitious might cause his doom. It's all great fun, but it's the derg's sigh that elevates 'Protection' to something approaching tragedy; Sheckley's is a universe when even dergs are slaves to their nature and weary from the inexplicable rules of existence. A friend I showed this story to got it exactly backwards when he said, "It's good, but he’s no Douglas Adams.'" |

There'll be an airplane crash in Burma next week, but it shouldn't affect me here in New York. And the feegs certainly can't harm me. Not with all my closet doors closed.

No, the big problem is lesnerizing. I must not lesnerize. Absolutely not. As you can imagine, that hampers me.

And to top it all, I think I'm catching a really nasty cold.

The whole thing started on the evening of November seventh. I was walking down Broadway on my way to Baker's Cafeteria. On my lips was a faint smile, due to having passed a tough physics exam earlier in the day. In my pocket, jingling faintly, were five coins, three keys, and a book of matches.

Just to complete the picture, let me add that the wind was from the northwest at five miles an hour, Venus was in the ascendancy and the moon was decidedly gibbous. You can draw your own conclusions from this.

I reached the corner of 98th Street and began to cross. As I stepped off the curb, someone yelled at me, "The truck! Watch the truck!"

I jumped back, looking around wildly. There was nothing in sight. Then, a full second later, a truck cut around the corner on two wheels, ran through the red light and roared up Broadway. Without the warning, I would have been hit. |

"I couldn't really tell you what the talk was about. After all, I was pretty high, and I've never bothered to master a lot of the standard human concepts. Roughly speaking, it seemed like Jack thought he could prove that every possible universe exists. Considering my background, you'd think I'd be interested in what he might have to say on this topic . . . but you'd be wrong. I just wanted to lesnerize a couple of people and get the hell back to the Pure Land. . . . I couldn't stop myself from shlubbering out, 'I want to lesnerize you.' Why did I have to go and tip my hand like that, a part of my mind wondered bleakly. Helen had jumped to her feet, and when I slid to the floor I could see her shiny black underwear. It took the full force of my will to keep from beginning to rave in the mother tongue. . . . A 'Venusian's' mission on Earth is to reproduce by lesnerization, and then return to the Pure Land. Once enough of us have done this, there will be a web of consciousness connecting our universe and yours, and we will be able to draw the two closer together so that even the weak and diseased members of our race can move freely between 'Venus' and the Earth. Several members of my swarm have completed successful missions, and they have described to me in detail what it is like to have the sort of multiple trans-universal consciousness which Jack and Helen were puzzling out. . . . 'I can't believe this,' Jack said desperately. He ripped the top off another beer from the icebox. He'd left his first one by the werble, and he was scared to get close to me. He sat down on the kitchen chair. 'I'll watch,' he said shakily, 'But I'm not going to let you lesnerize us.' . . . I should have taken them then and there . . . but lesnerization goes a lot smoother if the human hosts are completely willing. It's a simple operation. You just run a pseudopod up the person's nose, suck out their brain, and fill their head up with part of your bodymass. Over the next year, your offspring slowly absorbs all of the host body, learning how to model it in the process. It's the way we've always reproduced on Earth. When we fission like this, we have to split off two buds . . . baby 'Venusians' . . . so we always have to lesnerize two people at once." |

"Neither of you must lesnerize for at least the first ten years of your relationship, starting form you first date; If either of you do, it will end badly in an incident involving cheese and some kind of transportation device." |

"Either way, do practice safe sex, and lesnerise at least once a day." |

"This monstah is known as a 'feeg.' It appears in a story by Robert Sheckley called 'Protection.' In the story a man sells his soul to the Devil who says he cannot collect unless the man 'lesnerizes,' but the Devil never tells the man what 'lesnerizing' is. Turns out that 'lesnerizing' is, uh, sneezing. In the story the feegs are what lurks in the closet which is why you have to keep the closet doors closed at all times." |

Lesnerizing is much less common in science fiction and fantasy, than everyday life. While some characters have adverse reactions to magic, truth drugs, or dishwashing detergent with lemon, most characters never seem to suffer from food allergies, allergies to cats or wool or other animals or animal fibers, or exposure to poison ivy or other often-adverse-reaction-causing plants. When writers include allergies, why are they doing it -- how much of it is to make the character seem more 'real,' how much is for some particular plot effect in the story, where the character's sneezing is important, or the wizard melts away with a bucket of detergent dumped on him? Do readers appreciate it, not appreciate it, or not care when characters' weaknesses include allergies?" |

"There is also the unlucky sneeze. . . . I had forgotten about the sneeze. . . . the protagonist (who is also the narrator) is warned not to lesnerize." |

"All I can say is nobody better sneeze around here or all hell will break loose. . . . Kip, of course, will take seriously the warning not to lesnerize." |

submitted by [Robert Sheckley]

lesqueet - "Let's go eat."

e.g., Are you ready? Then Lesqueet.

submitted by Kevin Elliott

lessedmit - An extremely intelligent person.

e.g., He was a lessedmit. No, of course I'm not talking about "Juan."

submitted by Juan Bastoole

lessoff - A term more fitting to replace the word "moron," which sounds too positive (more + on) to describe accurately the person you're referring to.

e.g., If'n there weren't so many lessoffs on the road, we might be able to make the movie on time.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

let gunch - Get lunch.

e.g., I'm hungry. Shall we let gunch?

submitted by Juice Maloose

let some air out of - Stab, stabbed. Several years ago I was talking with a middle-aged black guy in a pool hall. When he mentioned that he had just got out of prison, I asked him what he was in for. He said, "Some cracker was gittin' in my bidness, so I decided to let some air out of him." Since I was the only white guy in the room, I decided it might be better for my health if I found another place to spend my time.

e.g., Keep your smart aleck pie hole shut this time, Reggie. You open your yap again and someone's gonna let some air out of you.

submitted by HD Fowler

let the smoke out - To make something smoke by accident, usually damaging it. Most often used when in reference to electronics or automotive work.

e.g., If you install your own sound system without following the directions, there's a good chance you'll let the smoke out.

submitted by Tristan

lete - A. An Athlete. B. Someone from an elite class.

e.g., The letes are in the gym right now, so we can't use it.

submitted by Quigs

letheft - Legalized theft.

e.g., In over half the cases, marriage can be said to be letheft.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

letsgretch - What everyone in the theatre does as soon as the credits start rolling: Let's go stretch.

e.g., The movie ended, and the boy witnessed an innumerable amount of letsgretches as he squinted around the theater.

submitted by Jeff

lette - To take one too seriously.

e.g., I lette Mike. And Mike letted me.

submitted by LilCritic

lettertorial - A letter writen in response to an editorial opinion.

e.g., After reading the newspaper's editorial section, Henry felt the need to write a lettertorial to his local newspaper

submitted by Andy - (www)

lettuce spray - A dietary product that exemplifies America's almost religious-like, obsessive quest for permanent weight loss, without effort.

e.g., (Inner stream of consciousness from the minds of the overweight:) "Oh God, so fat...disgusting...these pants don't fit...weak and ugly...unhealthy...why can't...tried good...nothing worked...stupid...hate myself...TV infomercial...miracle new...guaranteed...thousands exercise...liquid on bland vegetables...taste delicious...feel full...makes sense...Lord, make it finally happen...must call... lettuce spray...

submitted by Charlie Lesko

leva - Outcast, shunned, defiled, exiled, completely unusable, dirty, foul, to be avoided at all costs. Can be a thing or a person. Used by southern California Hispanic gang members and those who know them.

e.g., Man, don't talk to him, he's leva after what he did to Gonzalo's girlfriend.

submitted by Scott

level 10 - Describing something as excessive.

e.g., Her Christmas decorations are Level 10. She's got about 3 million lights on her house.

submitted by Brett

levelator - You have elevator, escalator, and now levelator. A levelator refers to the rolling carpet you see in airports or in areas where there are long distances to walk. It is essentially the equivalent of an escalator except that it proceeds on a flat surface, on a level surface that is.

e.g., What a nuisance it is when the levelators at the airport are not working and you have to walk miles and miles carrying heavy bags.

submitted by Robert Bendavid - (www)

levelity - The state of being level.

e.g., Before we can nail the board down, we must check its levelity.

submitted by Lauren

levellic - Relating to levels, having a system of levels, hving ranks or hierarchical.

e.g., I have made some levellic progress on my RPG. Tell me the levellic structure of the business.

submitted by Matt

leventhlevel - Beyond the first to tenth level, more advanced, better, progressive than anything else, futuristic, cutting edge, making the rest largely obsolete.

e.g., Recent leventhlevel non-chemical neo-meds and neo-lectronix are sure to revolutionize the medicating of the masses, and make them feel much better.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

leverage - To gain a large advantage at the pain and expense of one's subordinates. Usually minimal money, effort, and intelligence is required on the part of the leverager.

e.g., We are understaffed. Rather than hire enough people to do the work, we must further "leverage" the staff.

submitted by Dennim

leviathan of forensics - Said by David Wade, Joe Biden's spokesman, of Sarah Palin before the 2008 Vice Presidential Debate between Palin and Biden, but worthy of the loquacious Biden himself. This made-up formulation of real words deserves being recorded for its obscurity: a formidable debater, a leviathian being something large and powerful and forensics referring to "the art or study of argumentation and formal debate." Carping aside, though, I'm pleased to see that Wade did not refer to Palin as a master debater.


Found at Wordie 
“She's very skilled and she'll be well-prepared,” said Barack Obama’s chief strategist David Axelrod Sunday night, flying with Biden back to Delaware to help him get ready.

“As you saw at the convention she can be very good. So, I think it would be foolish to assume that this isn’t going to be a really challenging debate. We're preparing for that, on that assumption.”

Taking it one step farther, Biden spokesman David Wade later added, “He's going in here to debate a leviathan of forensics, who has debated five times and she's undefeated.”

submitted by HD Fowler

levitation fu - A style of fighting similar to kung fu, where people soar through the air, a la _Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon_. From Matt Mullins's review of _LoTR: Fellowship of the Ring_.

e.g., Hwa! I will defeat you will my masterful use of levitation fu.

submitted by Gargomon251

lewdicrous - Actions absurd and oddly funny, with sexual overtones.

e.g., Paying more for old, faded, and worn jeans than for a brand new pair, is patently ridiculous. Then, wearing those old jeans with holes in the knees area so that kneecaps are bald and exposed, is downright idiotic. But the new fad of leaving the pants fly zipper down and open, is completely lewdicrous.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

lewinsky - This one doesn't meet our pd criteria for accepting, but it's worth reserving a spot in our lexicon to remind us of how low the lowjinks in the Oval Office can get. The word commemorates "an American political sex scandal that involved 49-year-old President Bill Clinton and 22-year-old White House intern Monica Lewinsky."

e.g., She gives a damn mean lewinsky, too.

submitted by Ben Worthlessburger - (www)

lewising - to be paralysed by the amount of things that need to be done RIGHT NOW, resulting in one standing the middle of the room spinning and waving ones hands in the air

e.g., I just had so many places to be this afternoon, I just stood in the kitchen lewising

submitted by Zedley

lewtz - money cash

e.g., i am goin to the bank to get some lewtz

submitted by Tom

lex-bizkits - An exclusive club of girls selected by none other than Lex. These girls are the best and the brightest (but most commonly the closest).

e.g., Oh, how I wish I were a LeX-Bizkit.

submitted by Jonny

lexaphobia - A fear of new and strange words.

e.g., Thesauruses bring out my lexaphobia.

submitted by Hank

lexdysia - a reflexive word meaning dyslexia

e.g., I must have lexdysia - I keep scrambling my ablesyllas.

submitted by Giz Bowe

lexi - Lexicon, dictionary.

e.g., I hope my word gets added to the lexi at pseudodictionary.

submitted by HD Fowler

lexi-klept - A kleptomaniac who steals dictionaries. From a William Safire column written in 1987 and published in The New York Times.



IN VICTOR HUGO'S Les Miserables, which is getting a big ride these days, hero Jean Valjean is pursued by the relentless Inspector Javert in effect for stealing a loaf of bread to feed a starving child.

I identify with Javert. That is because this Reuters dispatch has come across my desk: "San Francisco's posh Stanford Court Hotel has never lost a Bible but since it put dictionaries in its 402 rooms last month, 41 have been swiped."

That dream of a dictionary in every hotel room was my big idea. I saw myself as the Johnny Appleseed of linguistics, persuading hotel owners to put dictionaries in rooms everywhere, enabling weary travelers to look up the meanings and spellings of words used in late-night X-rated movies. (Go look up lubricious in the middle of the night with nothing but a Gideon Bible in the room.) And what happens when a high-class hotelier sensitive to the needs of literate guests stocks his rooms with dictionaries? One out of 10 guests turns out to be a lexi-klept. At this rate, all the dictionaries will have been stolen by the end of a year. What a sad commentary on the human condition; it is as if somebody is following me around, pulling up apple-tree seedlings.

The managing director of the Stanford Court, John Cameron, offers this excuse, probably because he doesn't want to knock these thieving guests: "I guess everybody has a Bible at home but a lot of people would like to have a dictionary."

Wrong. People think that if they steal a Bible, the very inappropriateness of the act will cause them to be struck by lightning; but if they lift a dictionary, they assume God won't care. As a result, departing guests leave The Word and grab the words. The Stanford Court management, a bunch of softies, is now putting stickers on the remaining lexicons: "Love is leaving our dictionary here when you leave."

If that namby-pamby stuff doesn't work, try Safire's Curse: If you steal a dictionary, there will come a day when your child will ask you for the meaning of a word, and you'll feel too guilty to look it up in the stolen book and will misinform him, and he'll be on a quiz show with a chance of winning Vanna White as a prize and will repeat your mistake and will then sue you for parental malpractice and pick you clean.

Patronize hotels with dictionaries. Use the dictionary as needed (lubricious: slippery, or wanton; see lecherous). Then leave the dictionary in the room.

submitted by [William Safire] - (www)

lexiaxithoraxi - The art of cutting one's own speeches off in mid-delivery by the simple expedient of not-vocalising them.

e.g., "Mr. Speaker, there are times when one wishes that the filibusterer opposite would end with a bit of lexiaxithoraxi," said the prime minister.

submitted by Alan March - Maddams

lexicoignorapathy - The psychological condition of ignoring a word that exists in the lexicon or the vernacular of a given language in order to satisfy prudence, style, or current political correctness.

e.g., Ignoring the existence of many words in the English language is pure lexicoignorapathy.

submitted by Herb Balch

lexicomane - A lover of dictionaries. Lexicomaniac. Compare with lexicophile, lexicophiliac, logophile, and logomaniac; contrast with lexicophobe and lexicophobic.

e.g., Thanks to Charles Harrington Elster, I now know that I'm a lexicomane.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

lexicon - Fraudulent legal research.

e.g., The newly-fledged paralegal, thinking her brief came from LexisNexis, was completely taken in by a lexicon.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

lexiconcoct - To invent a word.

e.g., With no appropriate word at the tip of his tongue, Bill was forced to lexiconcoct.

submitted by Nick Pudar

lexiconiphilist - "One who loves dictionary, dictionaries and other books of words."

e.g., Am I a lexiconiphilist? I'd say so. My motto is "One always needs another dictionary."

submitted by HD Fowler

lexiconize - To make use of a new word common enough to make it qualify for the major published dictionaries

e.g., The dream of many Pseudodictionary users is for our words to be lexiconized.

submitted by Dr. Dan Muldoon

lexiconophiliac - Person who bleeds words when cut. Person who speaks so long that the words seem to run down the front of her blouse like blood from a nosebleed.

e.g., The author is a lexiconophiliac. He spoke at such length about his newest book that I thought I saw words dribble from his mouth like saliva from a wino.

submitted by Chris - (www)

lexicutioner - One who, knowingly or not, murders her own language.

e.g., President Bush said "nucular" again? He's a lexicutioner.

submitted by Jim Edgar - (www)

lexidespontia - The feeling of profound depression upon discovering that your submission was not, in fact, the ten-thousandth entry. (See "decakilonym.")

e.g., Despite my superb submission, my entry was not selected as the ten-thousandth entry and therein lies the taproot of my lexidespontia. (It was, indeed, a fine entry. The editor likes "lexidespontia" even more. It just came in about five or ten words early.)

submitted by Stephen Mize

lexifabricographer - One who invents words that she is too lazy to look up.

e.g., If the lexifabricographers took the time to check, wasting time on duplicates could be avoided. Of course they wouldn't be lexifabricographers if they bothered with that.

Dave Versace: On blogging

It's a diverting enough exercise when there's time to do it. For me, blogging serves a range of purposes, from straight diary-style recording of the day's events, to capture and distribution of amusements and information, to passive and usually futile prompts for conversation on whatever topic happens to be bugging me, to uninformed and usually unwarranted complaints and/or rants railing against the iniquities of life or At least the irritant of the moment.

I sometimes forget that for several people, it's also the only source of information on whether I am, in fact, alive. The art of regular correspondence being a dead one, as far as I'm usually concerned, the sole reassurance that many of my scattered friends and colleagues have of my ongoing corporeality is the (very occasional) reward they get for going to the effort of clicking on that Lexifabricographer link in their bookmarks.

So for the surprising number (i.e. more than one) of correspondents who enquired after my health, having noted the unprecedented lack of blogging in recent epochs, thank you kindly for your well wishes and rest assured that all is well and I am still of this mortal coil.

I am, of course, still quite lazy.

Since the end of the holidays, it has by turns been either too hot to want to bother with typing or too dramatic to spare the time for catching up. I'll try to fill in some of the details over the course of today, so expect lots of little snippets rather than the usual mass of semi-organised information. Or amusement. Whichever.

submitted by [Dave Versace] - (www)

lexifabricography - The art of desperately inventing a word to substitute for one that you can't think of right now.

e.g., The good folks here are at the forefront of the scholarly pursuit of lexifabricography.

submitted by Dave Versace - (www)

lexifabricology - Making up words or the study of same.

e.g., The TV series Seinfeld was known for its lexifabricology. Such words as "mimbo," "soup Nazi," and "schmoopie" were invented for the show.

submitted by Ty Evans

leximaven - Someone who loves words, from "lexi" (word) and "maven" (knowledgeable about something).

e.g., Leximavens beware, this site is addictive.

submitted by etymos - (www)

lexiphanes -

Anu Garg | A.Word.A.Day the newsletter One who uses words pretentiously.

[From Greek lexiphanes (phrase monger), from lexis (word or phrase) + -phaneia (to show).]

-Anu Garg (words at

"The danger is in becoming so seduced by the lexiconic that we become lexiphanes. There's no excuse for indulging in the bombastic at any time, of course."

-- Murray Waldren; That's Language; The Australian (Sydney); Jul 16, 2005.

e.g., Danger, Will Robinson, danger. There's danger in using big words. I started out just carrying-on, pretending to show off my new vocabulary. … Next thing I knew I was no longer faking it. I had become a full-fledged lexiphanes. My change from simple Kansas farm girl was so complete and I enjoyed using big words so much that I became addicted to thesauruses. I was lost.

I knew then I had no chance at all of going back. I could never again be that cute -- that loveable and simple -- girl that I had been oncet upon a time. So, when I was offered a job as editor at PseudoDictionary, I jumped at the chance. I've since settled in as resident curmudgeoness. The site may be verbal high jinks for HD -- no doubt it's a lot of fun for him -- but it's the seat of power for me.

Editing for lexiphany: Danger, Will Robinson, danger. There's There is danger endangerment in using big pretentious words, Will Robinson, endangerment. I started out just carrying-on being preposterous, pretending to show off my new newly found vocabulary pseudo-vocabulary. … Next thing I knew I was no longer faking it masquerading. I had become a full-fledged transcendent lexiphanes. My change transformation from simple Kansas farm girl uncomplicated Kansas vineyard mademoiselle was so complete thoroughgoing and I enjoyed using big words so much so reveled in uttering asseverating sesquipaedalian profundities that I became addicted to thesauruses thesauri. I was lost Alas, with that I was done for doomed.

I knew then I had no chance at all of going back. I could never again be that cute -- that loveable and simple -- girl schoolgirl that I had been oncet upon a time. So, when I was offered a job as proffered the billet of editor Editrix Extraordinaire at PseudoDictionary, I jumped caprioled at the chance opportunity. I've I have since settled in as resident curmudgeoness. The site may be verbal high jinks for HD Mr. HD Fowler -- no doubt it's a lot of fun for him indubitably a literal veritable figurative bacchanalia for him, no doubt -- but it's it is the seat of power for me.

Resulting in a lexiphaned version: Danger, Will Robinson, danger. There is endangerment in using pretentious words, Will Robinson, endangerment. I started out just being preposterous, pretending to show off my newly found pseudo-vocabulary. … Next thing I knew I was no longer masquerading. I had become a transcendent lexiphanes. My transformation from uncomplicated Kansas vineyard mademoiselle was so thoroughgoing and I so reveled in asseverating sesquipaedalian profundities that I became addicted to thesauri. Alas, with that I was doomed.

I knew then I had no chance at all of going back. I could never again be that cute -- that loveable and simple -- schoolgirl that I had been oncet upon a time. So, when I was proffered the billet of Editrix Extraordinaire at PseudoDictionary, I caprioled at the opportunity. I have since settled in as resident curmudgeoness. The site may be verbal high jinks for Mr. HD Fowler -- indubitably a figurative bacchanalia for him, no doubt -- but it is the seat of power for me.

(ED. Yes, the editor [pretentious talk] has met a Kansas vineyard owner.)

submitted by HD Fowler

lexipoeia, or lexicopoeia - Noun. Gr. lexis, "word, phrase, expression," from legein, say, and Gr. poiein, "to make or compose." Ð word-composition, word-creation; the minimal genre of literature, the art of composing a single word (from roots and combining forms).

e.g., There are many sorts of neologisms: new brand names, scientific terms, political or technical jargon, colloquialisms, and slang. When a word is composed for the word's sake, as a manifestation of its beauty, this genre of verbal creativity is called "lexipoeia."

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

lexipoem, or lexicopoem - N. Gr. lexis, "word, phrase, expression," from legein, say, + Gr. poiein, "to make or compose." Ð a single word, a neologism as a poetic composition, a creative work.

e.g., Ralph Emerson said: "Every word was once a poem." The word lexipoem is an abbreviation of this aphorism condensed into a single word. Every word (lexis) was once a poem (poiema)É and still IS at the moment of its coinage.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

lextacular - Refrencing Lex Luthor. Amazingly intelligent, scheming with overall desire to take over the world.

e.g., Napoleon was very lextacular, but was unable to get his way.

submitted by Queen Cupcake

lexture - (lex-CHOOR; also lext; v.) 1.To lecture (i.e., reprove, chastise, bawl out) by text; 2. to lecture (i.e., instruct, teach) by text.

e.g., "Did you get busted for breaking curfew?" "Yeah. My mom lextured me fpr, like, six hours about it." "Bummer."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lexus nervosa - Lexus Nervosa is the nervous condition suffered by recent purchasers of new luxury cars, which is mitigated after the vehicle gets its first ding or scratch and finally vanishes when the car turns into a decrepit clunker.

e.g., Henry's Lexus Nervosa was making him crazy, robbing him of any enjoyment of his new Mercedes and causing him to scream at other drivers and send them unfriendly hand signals -- all to make sure they did their part to keep his car dent-free.

submitted by Dennis R. Ridley

lgbtq - Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Queer|Questioning

e.g., "The LGBTQ Center does not keep any sort of statistics on the number of transgender students at Brown, or the number who would like to change their sexual characteristics. Nevertheless, Garrett said, the LGBTQ Center has promoted the added health care coverage for many years, on the theory that the high costs of sex changes have prevented transgender students from seeking surgeries and hormone treatments."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

liarrhea - A condition in which one has uncontrollable discharges of lies, occurring incessantly. Often they will lie so much they will mess up their lives and others as well, and just when they have gotten everything cleaned up, and gotten their act together, more lies come out and mess everything up again.

e.g., Most politicians suffer from liarrhea as well as logorrhea.

submitted by Ben "Sven" Gentile

liatur - Derived from "music guru": a person who listens to al ot of TripleJ, a non-commercial radio station in Australia, or a person who makes a sweet song (not pop or hip hop).

e.g., That liatur never gets off his fat arse.

submitted by musru - (www)

libation - (Rhymes with "pie-BAY-shun" (or "-shin," depending upon your dialect); n.) Aside from its ordinary meaning: a drink offering to a god or gods (that is, someone taking a drink and wishing the blessings of their god/s, pours a small amount their drink out upon the ground as an offering); 1. a failed strategy (e.g. a basketball shot that bounces off the basket; a golf ball that doesn't go in on a two-foot putt; a perfect pass that gets intercepted; an outrageously unpredictable bounce that puts a football (soccer ball) into the other side's goal; sinking the cue ball; losing a chess piece unexpectedly; missing a pop fly; missing a single-pin spare; ... that sort of thing) viewed as one "spill" in honor of the game's gods.

e.g., "Ahhh! Don't sink the first basket, Man! It's bad juju!" "What?" "You gotta let the basket win the first one, or the court will turn against you, and you'll lose!" "What?!" "Yeah, man, Rudy can't even score in that court over on ninth street ... he nearly always scored, every throw. That court just hates him." "What?!!---Are you serious?!" "Yeah, man: Remember, miss a shot every now and then---it's a libation." "It's a what?" "A libation, fool. Don't you listen in school?"

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

libbet - (LIB-bit; n.) 1. An old word for fruit-picking pole (well, a pole used to knock ripe fruit off fruit-tree branches); 2. a pole-vaulting pole, the event being called "a libbet sprint" rather than "pole vaulting." [A dialectal English term: no one seems to have any idea where it comes from, but it apparently meant "stick" back in the day.]

e.g., 1. I took a libbet and emptied six orange trees. || 2. The women's team set a school libbet-sprint record: 14 feet 9 inches.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

liberal - A person who believes her fantasies should be facts.

e.g., "Every single cause championed by liberals is based on a fake story. They make up events that didn't happen and get apoplectic over things that never will happen."

submitted by [Ann Coulter] - (www)

liberal arts education - An education that often does a better job of teaching college students how to enjoy the finer things in life than those with degrees in chemistry, engineering, mathematics, physics, and other so-called hard sciences. I'll bet they're also more likely to be interested in social justice.  
Unfortunately, unless they get advanced degrees, liberal arts majors are not terribly likely to be able to get jobs that will enable them to afford &hellip the finer things in life. Armed with advanced degrees, however, some of them can get teaching jobs in colleges and universities and earn a decent living. Lacking an advanced degree, getting employed as a sales clerk is about all they should aspire to.

e.g., Ah, no, Emily, surely you're not going to be a liberal arts major? ... You are? Well, at least with a liberal arts education you'll be able to get a job a bit better than working in a fast food joint. Maybe even get a job as a hostess at a decent restaurant.

submitted by Lillith

liberals - Copyright Michael Tremoglie, FrontPage "...liberals are the self-righteous, led by the self-important, for the benefit of the self-serving."

e.g., Of course we get to ignore the New Jersey election laws. We don't need laws; we just need to be in control. We're liberals and we're always right.  

All that's important is that we win -- even if we have to do it by flouting election laws and other laws. We'd have won the 2000 Presidential election if the US Supreme Court hadn't been around. They stopped our minions on the Florida Supreme Court who were intent on letting us steal yet another election. The Florida guys just weren't as good as Daley -- when we needed votes in 1960, he came through for us in Illinois. His son is just a pale imitation of the old man. For that matter, '40s Florida guys would have come through for us. Edward G. Robinson had it right in Key Largo.

submitted by [Michael Tremoglie]

liberati - A group of persons who share the birth sign Libra; most notably the Liberati travel about randomly, completely unable to make any real desicions.

e.g., Look at the pack of idiots coming through the door wearing drover coats. Are they liberati or what?

submitted by Jeremiah

libertarican - Libertarican is a Libertarian that vote sRepublicans, or more likely a voter that agrees with a philosophy of smaller government and economic liberalism. Skews socially conservative but not to the extent of religious right; eschews the Libertarian rigid isolationism and favors a strong military like Neocons.

e.g., Dan Proft is running for governor of Illinois in 2010 -- he is a Libertarican.

submitted by Dominic Tassone - (www)

libidocracy - (lih-BEE-dough-crat; n.) One who believes in government by acquiescence to the sex drive. [From libido "sex drive" (loosely) + cracy "rule by" (from Greek kratos "strength").] Also libidocracy (lih-bih-DOCK-russ-ee) "government based upon the sex drive."

e.g., Hollywood often seems to portray the world as an undiluted libidocracy.

submitted by scott m. ellsworth

libidolatry - (lih-bih-DOLL-uh-tree; n.) Worship of the sex drive, especially in movies and tv, wherein everybody is healthy, beautiful, and attractive, if not positively voluptuous. [From Libido "sex drive" (loosely) + latria "worship of."]

e.g., Judging from commercials, television, and movies, the national religion of ... well, every nation under Heaven practices unbridled libidolatry.

submitted by Scott m. ellsworth

lible - A book of untruths on which is based many religious beliefs.

e.g., It must be true if it says so in the Lible.

submitted by Jonty Reason - (www)

libraletto - Democratic party talking point script sent out Friday night to the Sunday morning political talk shows.

e.g., Sam Donaldson read that last argument straight from the libraletto.

submitted by Piatt Gray

librese - (n.) 1. The language of librarians, especially the Library of Congress subject headings list (and perhaps the old Dewey Decimal) and the accompanying terminology of information science. (adj.) 2. Of or pertaining to the language of librarians.

e.g., "Where do you keep your stuff on the history of warfare? I can't seem to find anything: I don't speak Librese."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

librism - A political and economic system that advocates Capitalism in general but criticizes it as this facilitates the transfer of capital from one generation to another without any effort from second generation. To avoid this it suggests population management in which the poor are discouraged for reproduction and the rich are encouraged.

e.g., Librism is the key to the next generation of political and economic system.

submitted by Sandeep Verma - (www)

license poisoning - License poisoning is what happens when someone who is a firm believer in one license (e.g., the BSD license) reads too much code covered by a license that they believe to be faulty (e.g., the GNU GPL).

e.g., Chris (a stern BSD adherent) thought about reading Slashcode, but was afraid of getting license poisoning.

submitted by apeiron - (www)

licit - A lawyer.

e.g., The barrister was all alone, so he was a sole licit (or was he?).

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

lick tide - The residual moisture left on one's face after an extremely wet, more like sloppy, kiss.

e.g., The blissful moment vanished as she realized she had left Pat's face awash with her lick tide.

submitted by Dave Violette

lickasourus - A large dog that can't stop licking people.

e.g., The lickasourus just got me.

submitted by Kyle Pellitier

lickety-split - Rapidly; fast.

e.g., You get in there and clean your room lickety-split.

submitted by Eric Belt

licksmidgen - What is found when someone puts back the jelly jar with barely enough to scrape off from the sides, or the box of crackers with 1/2 cracker in the bottom, or the classic 2 teaspoons of milk left in the jug, etc.

e.g., was gonna make me a pb&j but someone's left only a licksmidgen of milk in the fridge.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

lickspittle - An existing word worth noting, it's defined at as "a contemptible, fawning person; a servile flatterer or toady." Since I'm not as hung up on being civil in real life (i.e., my reality), I'm a lover of insult words -- and this is one of the best. Teenagers are warned not to use it to refer to their archenemy's followers, especially if they're armed.

e.g., If you have good sense, you won't cross Chris. She still has a virtual army of lickspittles in her debt.

submitted by HD Fowler

lid - (n.) (in addition to its usual meaning, "the cover, top, etc., of a container of any kind," and the other meanings it has acquired, "stopper, bung" ('put a lid on it'), "hat, cap, cover" ('someone left his lid on the chair'), and (oddly) "a completed agenda" ('that's a full lid'), I add these: 1. The container, package, case, envelope, or box in which something is kept, especially CDs and DVDs; 2. The door, hatch, awning, canopy, or other covering beneath or behind which something is kept; also (v.) 3. To put something away, return it to its container.

e.g., 1. Someone left out six DVDs! Do you all think I'm made of money? Where are the lids to these movies?! 2. So we're waiting to take off, and this guy is packing the overhead compartment with a carry-on the size of a small hippo, but somehow he finally managed to close the lid. 3. Leave your lawn mowing and help me lid this trash.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

lidleship - (pronounced - lid_le_ship) A top notch leader.

e.g., She is a true lidleship.

submitted by chiaralopilato - (www)

lie alty - The true state of commitment to promises made by a politician during an election campaign.

e.g., "I promise you one thing," said the politician to thousands of adoring and applauding supporters, "You have my undying lie alty to every single promise I have made you during this election -- I swear on my soul!"

submitted by Charlie Lesko

lie lie lie - A perfect response to known liars.

e.g., Chris said, "So blah, blah, blah and such-n-such." Steve says, "Lie, lie, lie."

submitted by steve zihlavsky

lie-ability - The measure of how well someone tells a non-truth.

e.g., No matter how good you are at telling untruths, eventually, having superior lie-ability can end up being a liability.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

lielingual - Adjective used to describe a person to whom the language of lies is almost his/her native tongue, a person who is fluent in the laguage of lies. Compare with bilingual, someone who is fluent in two languages.

e.g., Don't believe a word of what Hillary Clinton says; she lies so much that I think she is lielingual.

submitted by Robin Nilsson

lien holder - A person, who helps keep a drunk (who’s LIENING!) standing up.

e.g., Wally the wino owes me big time. Having helped him up out of the gutter several times, I'm his lien holder.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

liet - Lying about the foods you are eating when on a diet.

e.g., She says she is only eating lettuce. I know she lost weight, but I think she is lieting

submitted by Keith Hersch

life's got momentum - Momentum is the measure of the quantity of motion, a pushing strength. (Momentum = mass x velocity.) Therefore, the phrase means that life is basically pushing against you, forcing you into unpleasant or undesirable situations.

e.g., Sally: So, can you come to the party tonight? Jenny: I can't. I have a huge history test to study for, a science project to finish, and an essay to write. I want to come, but life's got momentum.

submitted by Emily - (www)

lifecrash - A collision of or relating to animate existence. The idea behind the word lifecrash is a simple one. Most of the time, our life is in collision: be it with somebody else, or something, or just imploding upon itself. Lifecrash is essentially a noun and describes the collision, as given in the above definition. It can also be used as a verb: to lifecrash, meaning to hopelessly screw up, to hit the proverbial wall. Lifecrash can be used as a descriptive noun, or an adjective: a lifecrash situation, when things get really bad and you know that you are just about to undergo a lifecrash.

e.g., I had a lifecrash last week when I lost my job, my partner, and all my savings. Drat.

submitted by Greenmantle - (www)

lifescape - Depiction of life in any kind of art form or literature.

e.g., The lifescape in the movie is of the jet set.

submitted by Parameswaran

lifesweep - The point in time at which majority opinion among a group of people flips over from "There's still a chance we're all about to die" to "It's pretty unlikely we'll die now."

e.g., The wind on the landing strip delayed the lifesweep for a bit, but I was already planning my move to grab my carry-ons first.

submitted by John - (www)

lificydal - Opposite of suicidal. When you feel like you would do anything to live longer.

e.g., After roller skating through a life of happiness and freedom, it was no wonder that he remained lificydal in his 90s.

submitted by Lisa

lift ticket - The telephone number that the target of your affections has given you. (Don't bother if it has a 1-900 prefix.)

e.g., Check it out. I got a lift ticket.

submitted by duncan

liftaphobia - The fear of being close to the ground or to low places.

e.g., Do I have liftaphobia? I'm scared of the ground.

submitted by miriam

liftgift - A cloud of flatus left behind in an elevator, invariably by the person(s) who most recently departed said conveyance.

e.g., "Liftgift!" the spy gasped, wasting valuable air by talking aloud for dramatic effect even though he was alone. It had to have been the cryptographer from Alpha Section who had just gotten off. The ceiling hatch was his only chance.

submitted by adam thorsell

lig - Let it go. Snoop Dogg himself has said izzle talk is dead -- and he said it years ago. | A cigarette, usually lit.

Snoop Dogg on izzle talk: Let it go. MTV: So the word is that you've been telling people the "izzle" is over.

Snoop Dogg: The message is LIG: Let it go. OK, America? Let it go. You can't say "izzle" no more. Tizzle, fizzle, dizzle — none of that. It's over with. LIG. Let it go.

Snoop: I overdosed on it. I'm seeing it everywhere, you know what I'm saying? It's like, it becomes bad after it becomes too much, you know what I'm saying? I overdosed off of it. So let's find something new. Maybe pig Latin, anything. Come on.

e.g., LIG. Let it go. | Can I bum a lig off your pack?

submitted by Daniel, too - (www)

liger-sized - (or liger-size; adj.) 1. enormous, especially when such size is unexpected; 2. a very large member of a group of smaller individuals (often used as a label for the largest member of an animal litter or human family). [From the tendency of Lion+Tigress hybrids to attain great size, far bigger, in fact, than either of their parents.]

e.g., George is liger-sized. His dad is 5'10", and his mom's only about 5'3", but he's 6'9". | Gimme the two-pound-burger, megafries, and a gigagalleon of grape soda. Oh, and Liger-size it.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

liggit - Light.

e.g., Turn off the light!

submitted by Cati

liggity - The same as a left turn.

e.g., Take a liggity at the top of the ski slope, bitch .

submitted by Cremi Cremlin

light attendant - Something or somebody who helps you switching on or off delights.

e.g., Light attendant, please. I cannot see anything.

submitted by phrasardeur - (www)

light in the loafers - To say that a male is light in the loafers is to say that he is effeminate or homosexual. Whether this is considered derogatory or not by the GBLT community is unknown to me, but my guess is that a straight person who says of a non-straight man that he's a little light in the loafers does not intend the remark as a compliment. Saying that someone is light in the loafers seems to fit in the same class of epithets as "he likes show tunes" or "he's a friend of Dorothy." One supposes the possibility that such terms can be used in either a pseudo-friendly or pseudo-invective way, depending on the sayer and the sayee. There are probably dozens if not hundreds of such epithets, but since I have no use for them, I'm not familiar with them.

e.g., "Nancy said that Georgie handled the situation in his usual spoiled little baby, nambi-pambi way." "Hey, aren't Nancy and George the two who elsewhere made a reference to someone being light in the loafers -- the reference being that the guy was homosexual?" "Nah, that was some light in the loafers fellow who said that -- meaning, I suppose, that no one should take offense since it amounted to the pot calling the kettle black. Just exactly how does that work?" "I'm not really sure. But I do know this -- I don't mind if some other bald guy makes a remark about my being bald. However, if you're a guy who has a head full of hair, I'm going to take anything you say about baldness as somehow being related to your trying to show some kind of hirsute superiority to me. In other words, I'm going to be offended -- and retaliate in kind."

submitted by HD Fowler

light nazi - Someone who is frantically obsessed with turning lights on or off

e.g., Aaron turns the lights off. We turn them back on. Little Aaron goes and tells on us and kicks us and wipes chocolate all over us. (And doesn't even clean it up. Ugh, how rude.) Aaron turns the lights off again. We turn them back on. This goes on for a considerable ammount of time. Aaron is henceforth called the light nazi.

submitted by Nicky Ubben

lightbeard - A very long, undefined period of time, although far less than a "lightyear." So named so because you could grow a beard, or at least a bit of stubble, within this interval.

e.g., Do you think I should phone Jimmy? It's been lightbeards since I last spoke to him.

submitted by mike d - (www)

lighthearted - Having an illuminated blood pump.

e.g., The guy became lighthearted when the cardio-vascular surgeon left his MiniMag flashlight in the aorta.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

lightmare - (n.) 1. A period marked by frequent, intense lighting strikes, especially at night, when everything is otherwise dark and quiet; 2. A direct lighting strike, and its accompanying mind-numbingly loud thunderclap, upon your house or building, especially if it wakes you up or throttles you out of whatever other activity you are involved in, sets your ears to ringing, and leaves you with a bad case of the shakes. (From LIGHTning + nightMARE.)

e.g., I can remember a lightmare strike back in the 1976, I think, in Annapolis, Maryland. There was a horribly uninterrupted series of flashes and grumbling, and every now and then a crack or a clap that hurt my ears. It was off in the distance, most of the time, but I learned later that this hour or so of incessant flash-and-rumble had caused some serious every-man-for-himself-and-the-sky-against-all damage. And killed several people as well, some claimed. As if this wasn't enough pounding, I was just coming up from the basement into the kitchen with a can of Del Monte green beans when a great shock of light filled the room around me and the loudest noise I believe I have ever heard in my life grabbed and shook the building with an end-of-the-world sort of BOOM that almost knocked me down. It made the distant sheets of lighting look somehow dark, and the thunder quite tip-toe-mousey-quiet (as Kipling would say) by comparison.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lightning rod - What you get when you mix Viagra with iron supplements. From a Jay Leno joke.

e.g., Did you hear about the guy who got struck by lightning on his . . . groin area? You don't want to be running around with a lightning rod during a thunderstorm.

submitted by beelzebub

lightning-monster - n., Contained electricity or shielded high tension lines, as often depicted by a picture of a sort of angular octopus iwht jaggedy arms on older transformers, power stations, and the like. [Note: anything with such a label is called a "lightning-monster box."]

e.g., "Did you get a good run in today?" "Yeah: I got all the way to that lighting-monster box on the interstate---about six miles there and back."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

lightnining - Continuous bolts of lightning coming from above... LOOK OUT!

e.g., I wouldn't go outside if I were you. It's Lightnining out there.

submitted by steve - (www)

ligouri bid - A request for a price (bid) on a small amountof fixed income securities. Usually $5,000 worth or less.

e.g., Some piker is giving me a hard time about this Ligouri Bid he's asking for.

submitted by Justin Karol

liguori bid - A bid on any fixed income security for a face amount of $5,000 or less.

e.g., At around five o'clock, Smith came in with six separate Liguori Bids. Talk about upset traders.

submitted by Justin Karol

lije - (n.) a three wood golf club [apparently because the '3' looks like an 'e' as in elijah wood (the actor), and 'lije' is short for 'elijah'].

e.g., Calling a three wood a lije is no more strange than calling it "the spoon," as the older jargon would have it, or calling a seven iron a "mashie-niblick," whatever that's supposed to mean.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

like - used to imply metaphor. Currently greatly over- and mis-used. See also

e.g., ""Well, she was like 'yeah, are you talking to me?' and he was like 'yeah, my friend thinks you are like, cute.'""

submitted by kara - (www)

like an ape to an empty shirt - When someone just seems to take to something, getting on smoothly, fitting in perfectly, and having the time of her life -- yet in fact she is completely messing up the job.

e.g., Jane took to her new job like an ape to an empty shirt. It was her favorite job yet, but the company shut down within a week due to her incontinence imcompetence incompetence.

submitted by Adam Leslie

likebait - Also like-bait or like bait: "web content which is specifically intended to make Facebook users click the 'Like' button associated with it." Definition and examples from the link at MacMillan Dictionary.

e.g., "Survey respondents also claim they look to social networks and message boards to seek product recommendations. Thus, blog posts should act as Likebait to spark word-of-mouth referrals." Brafton 17th January 2011 | "Facebook cracks down on 'Like-baiting' … Pages that explicitly ask News Feed readers to 'Like' their posts will be demoted in Facebook's ranking.'" Telegraph UK 11th April 2014 | "The phenomenon of likebaiting is now so commonplace that Facebook started to clamp down on it in 2014, automatically detecting posts that explicitly invited responses and ensuring that these were not shown more prominently than other, more relevant content from sources that users were genuinely interested in."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

liked to had, have - Almost--as used in NC.

e.g., I liked to had died when that deer ran out in front of me.

submitted by Tina

likenahate - "(Like-na-hate) liking someone, but being unable to be friends with them because of a gaping character flaw you don't like."

e.g., "If Mike was not such a snob, I would stop liknahating him."

submitted by ryan

lil bear - Descriptive of what the dog does when standing on her back legs, waving her front paws at her beloved owners like a small bear. Also, the name of a restaurant in a small town in Florida, which was named after the dog.

e.g., Dog: (stands on back legs, waves front legs in air, looks much like miniature bear) Grr! Owner: Aww, come here, Lil bear! Second Beloved Owner: This reminds me of that restaurant in Florida!

submitted by Jen Rankin - (www)

lil' texan - Word used to describe someone with reference to possibly the worst WWF wrestler of all time, "the Texas tornado." Confined to Liverpool, England.

e.g., Get away from me, you lil' Texan.

submitted by Robert the minute king

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