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i can see your bum! - Used as a greeting when you can see your friend a bit ahead of you. You can't actually see her bum--you are just being playful and tricky. The only appropriate responses are "No, you can't," or "I thought it felt pleasantly breezy."

e.g., Kelly spotted Xav up ahead. "I can see your bum, Xav!" she yelled enthusiastically. "No you can't," Xav replied as she turned around, and both went off happily to enjoy the afternoon.

submitted by Kelly

i can't get it up - The courage to say or do something.

e.g., I've fallen, and I can't get it up = I've fallen in love, and I can't get up the courage to tell her. (ED. In this case, you're probably better off having no bottle.)

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

i choose you - From pokemon, regards a tool one is about to use. The more obvious, the better.

e.g., We need to go to the liquor store. '87 Chevy Blazer, I choose you.

submitted by qnarf

i demand - "I demand" is a game wherein the passengers in a car are all blindfolded. The driver, for obvious safety reasons, is exempt from this requirement. The passengers take it in turn to issue one of three instructions to the driver, who must comply to the best of his ability. The three instructions are "I demand you turn left," "I demand you turn right," and "I demand you go straight ahead." After the expiry of a pre-determined period of time, announced by the driver as the only one who can see his watch, the passengers have to guess precisely where they are before removing their blindfolds. The winner is the one who guesses the closest.

e.g., "I am bored driving aimlessly," said Colin. "I demand we play 'I demand'." "I am low on petrol" said Mick; "I demand we don't."

submitted by Colin Taffel

i denny kenn - (Scottish) I don't know.

e.g., Alafair: Where did Alowishus go? Scotty: I denny kenn.

submitted by Mr. Ragsinhisears - (www)

i got new shoes today - A phrase used to indicate that a person has entered the room but you do not want that person to know you have acknowledged her.

e.g., *hot guy enters room* I got new shoes today, Sara. Do you wanna take a look at them?

submitted by Daphne

i hope to shout! - Redneckese for "I certainly hope so!'"

e.g., Bo: So, Skeeter, are you going to the opening of deer hunting season in a couple of weeks? Skeeter: I hope to shout!

submitted by Paul

i know you are but what about - This is used as a comeback to any insult. It is meant to confuse the other person, giving you the last words

e.g., Chris: Donnie, you're a pilark. Donnie: I know you are but what about the table?

submitted by Donnie Mallen

i n-nun date - A Vatican approved anti-masturbatory litany, designed to flood, and detract, the mind with hilarious images, and help keep young Catholic boys "pure."

e.g., "I n-nun date" and "toe-knee-chest-nut" were my two favorite chants while in the sixth grade at St. Cyril's Catholic school.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

i said you look nice tonight - When you say something and someone asks you to repeat it, but you would rather not, you respond with "I said you look nice tonight."

e.g., You tell your friend "Jon's the nosiest guy I know." She asks you to repeat what you just said, but Jon walks up, so your response to her is "I said you look nice tonight."

submitted by Angie B - (www)

i saw ying - Slang for "a saying." Fig: To see one side of things. A killer.

e.g., Don't blame me if you don't understand me!...I saw ying...only.

submitted by Eloy

i see france - A way to tell a friend that his thong, bra strap, or boxers are showing. Taken from the old children's rhyme, "I see London, I see France, I see someone's underpants."

e.g., Psst, Jenny, fix your sweater. I see France.

submitted by Pineapple - (www)

i seen somebody get shot. - A threat that implies the speaker is extraordinarily tough.

e.g., Please, you don't know where I'm from. I seen somebody get shot.

submitted by Rocky RPM

i spilled my coffee! - This is a playful inside joke. It is a code for when you find someone so highly attractive that you'd spill your coffee just at the mention of her name. She makes you come undone inside, and most times you blush at the very thought of her.

e.g., "Datura, Vince. Spill your coffee now." "I spilled that, the entire carafe, and the coffee grounds."

submitted by Datura

i swan - Also "I swannee." I swear. The Word Detective tells us: "But, logical as it may seem, the Swannee River is not the source of "I swannee." For that we must travel to the north of England, where when folks really wanted other folks to believe something they were saying, they would preface it with "I shall warrant ye," meaning "I swear to you that this is true." Of course, accents in the north of England being thicker than wool soaked in molasses, what they actually said was closer to "I's wan ye," which sounds a great deal like "I swannee." It was in this form that the phrase was imported into the U.S. in the mid-19th century, although an even briefer form, "I swan," is perhaps more popular in this country. Today "I swannee" and "I swan" are most often used as interjections or expressions of surprise, as in "Ruth really ran off with that cute UPS guy? Well, I swan!"

e.g., "When I called and asked to speak to Michelle, I was told she didn't work there any more. I'll bet she ran off with that Fedex boyfriend of hers." "Well, I swan. I thought she loved every minute of her job. Do you suppose that changed when she was promoted to Assistant Director." "Maybe. Or it may have been a way to promote her to a job that could be eliminated. She might have been getting too expensive in her old job."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

i'd like to *verb* his *noun* - Base form for constructing sexual innuendo. Best effect is achieved by using the most innocent verb-noun combinations.

e.g., I'd like to wash his car.

submitted by iAn - (www)

i'm a dot - I'm departing. From the military fliers' experience of watching another plane leave a training area. As it leaves it gets smaller and smaller, until it loses its shape and becomes a dot.

e.g., I've got a meeting on the other side of base. Sorry, I'm a dot.

submitted by babbette

i'm doin' cartwheels - Used when you are expected to be excited but you could care less.

e.g., "John, we're going to grandma's today." "Oh, I'm doin' cartwheels."

submitted by Heather McKinney - (www)

i'm gone - A more casual way of saying "I'm leaving now."

e.g., Guy walking towards door: "I'm gone."

submitted by David

i'm madam - Acertain story has Adam, the first man, as saying to what had previously been one of his ribs (aka Eve, the first woman), "Madam, I'm Adam." Less commonly known is that Eve is reported to have replied, "Adam, I'm madam."

e.g., Reaching for it, what she "actually" said was not "Adam, I'm madam," but the more mystical "Atom, I'm mad am!" Referring to their atomic origins, and being delighted (mad) about being a human being. (Oh no)

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

i'm so mad at the secret service. - An exclamation. Usually said when you're angry or surprised but don't know who to be angry or surprised at. From The Simpsons.

e.g., We have a pop quiz today? I'm so mad at the Secret Service right now.

submitted by Doc

i'm your sire - Being the master of a vampire. Response given after successfully sending someone to "a dark alleyway" and sucking out her blood, making her a vampire.

e.g., Bert: What's this with you creeping up behind me in shadows? What happened to the Britney Spears site? Ernie: Ha ha. I sucked out your blood. Now I'm your sire.

submitted by pr00f_0f_d3f - (www)

i'ma - I am going to.

e.g., I'ma get going now. Toodles.

submitted by Mia

i'miz - A declarative statement in the affirmative.

e.g., Cashier at Piggly Wiggly: "Ma'am you can't use this Publisher's Clearinghouse check to buy your groceries; it's not a real check." Woman with a buggy full of Ding Dongs: "I'z gots dis check inda mail today, it's gots my name on it, so yes I'miz."

submitted by Bill

i-d-ten-t error - (n.) A problem or bug in a computer caused by improper human use rather than by errors in the software. (Etymology: idiot -> id10t -> i-d-ten-t)

e.g., Brandon: "There, I kicked the computer. Is that what you mean by 'boot'? Uh oh, error message! Is it a virus?" Tech support: "No, Brandon, it's an i-d-ten-t error."

submitted by Mirakle B.

i.d.ology - The science and study of I.D.s: names, codes, means of identification,

e.g., A thorough understanding of I.D.ology is essential to protecting and preserving the integrity of our country (USA).

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

i.r - Is Rank, used to decribe appearance of a person.

e.g., "What do ya think of my new girlfriend, Adam?" "I.R."

submitted by adam rompa

ian richton - Any middle-school/high-school student obsessed with a fetish for seeking attention and popularity more so than grades or scholastic excellence. Will sometimes resort to the use of high-class toilet items (say, 4711) to get the point. (Derived from the character in the Nickelodeon series "As Told by Ginger.")

e.g., "Don't tell me, but doesn't that kid in the lunchroom somehow remind you of one Ian Richton?"

submitted by Larry Ellis Reed - (www)

ianuic - Of or relating to doors. Derived from the Latin ianua meaning door. Pronounced "ee ANNE you ick"

e.g., There are some minor ianuic problems with the house.

submitted by Matt

iatollah -

Ayotallah: a high-ranking Shiite religious leader who is regarded as an authority on religious law and its interpretation and who has political power as well.

From Wikipedia: Romanization of Arabic

Different approaches and methods for the romanization of Arabic exist. They vary in the way that they address the inherent problems of rendering written and spoken Arabic in the Latin script. Examples of such problems are the symbols for Arabic phonemes that do not exist in English or other European languages; the means of representing the Arabic definite article, which is always spelled the same way in written Arabic but has numerous pronunciations in the spoken language depending on context; and the representation of short vowels (usually i u or e o , accounting for variations such as Muslim/Moslem or Mohammed/Muhammad/Mohamed ).


Posted for RM by MS; however, the spelling can hardly be called wrong. Transliteration from Arabic to English isn't arbitrary, of course, but it's not and can't be perfect either.

The example uses the grocer's apostrophe.

e.g., I don't think they mean it personally either. But the bastard iatollah's and the religious leadership a**wholes over there … indoctrinates them to say it. Citizens of a totalitarian regime where information is controlled have a completely whacky outlook on the rest of the world. Look at North Korea. Same thing. The roving blackouts and abject poverty is blamed on us by their government [and the populace] then thinks we are the cause of all their problems. So we are the Imperialist American dogs. Place the blame on anyone OTHER than your government so your people don't revolt; this had been done in governments since the dawn of civilization.

submitted by [Miss Speller for Ragemonkey]

iatriolatry - (ee-yeah-tree-ALL-uh-tree, YEAH-tree-oh-LAT-ree, or yuh-TRY-oh-lat-ree; n.) The improper veneration (anything from overzealous admiration to wildly fanatic jingoism) of the medical profession and its constituent members. [As opposed to iatriophily yeah-tree-OFF-ill-lee (q.v.)][From the Greek iatrikos "of or pertaining to a physician" + latria "worship."]

e.g., Justice Blackmun's opinion in Roe v. Wade smacks of iatriolatry, the way he defers to medical opinions as if they were holy writ.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

iatriophily - (yeah-tree-OFF-ill-lee; n.) 1. Delight in the healing arts; 2. A love of the medical disciplines. [From Greek iatrikos "of or pertaining to physicians" + philia "love, devotion."] Iatriophile: a believer in iatriophily.

e.g., "You think Brenda will go into medicine and not into politics?" "Talk to the girl: she loves medicine ... talks about it all day long. She's a iatriophile---big time."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

iatroplastic - From iatro = physician + plastic = formed, molded. (Unintentionally) shaped by a physician's care; as opposed to iatrogenic = caused by a physician.

e.g., Because a doctor's interests influence the patient's symptoms, hysteria is an iatroplastic disorder.

submitted by James Morrison

ib - A sort of keyboarding spoonerism for "on."

e.g., I prefer mayonnaise ib my sandwiches.

submitted by HD Fowler

ibiik - I'm buggered if I know!

e.g., Where's the TV remote? IBIIK

submitted by V - (www)

ibizarific - Something you might expect to see or hear in Ibiza to mean good or great.

e.g., Gosh, this music is Ibizarific.

submitted by Laura

ibnus - A deep seated desire or inward part inclining a person to submit absurd words to an online database of such.

e.g., "Hey, where's Steve?" "Where do you think?, parked if front of the computer again . . . his ibnus is still giving him trouble."

submitted by Steve Zihlavsky

ibs - Internet Bitch Slap (currently in v1.1.) -- used when someone only reachable electronically needs a bitch slap.

e.g., I just had to IBS a client. I didn't know they grew people that stupid.

submitted by Anne

ibu - Itty Bitty Unit. First used by Ms. Pigorsh on her honeymoon with Tom.

e.g., Tom's IBU is an embarrassment whenever he is in the gym locker room with Boy George.

submitted by D Tolbert

icarophobia - Fear of spaceflight or space. A form of agoraphobia first identified by Dr. Yevgueni Sheindlin and recognized in 1975 in The Congress for Space Medicine (Los Angeles, USA) by both NASA and Glavkosmos. | Fear of flying too close to the sun and falling into it.

e.g., No, thank you, I'll take a pass on that particular space flight -- because of my icarophobia. Who thought that was a good idea?

submitted by Bruno Teixidor - (www)

icd - Inadvertent Crash Disaster. The linking of a website on a weak server by a wildly popular one, causing catastrophic traffic overflows and crashes for the weaker server.

e.g., Penny-Arcade.com is single-handedly responsible for 11 ICDs this month.

submitted by Whit

ice - Expensive jewelry -- most often diamonds.

e.g., Did you see my girl flaunting the ice I gave her?

submitted by alexandra - (www)

ice - To kill.

e.g., Mookie just iced Clumsy McNothumbs.

submitted by zak

ice box - Before they had electric refrigerators, people used the simple ice box. There was a compartment just the right size for a standard block of ice, and a rather small section where you could store foods to be refrigerated.

e.g., Periodically, regularly, the ice man came around a delivered a fresh block of ice and put it in your ice box. The interesting thing is that for quite a while after getting an electric refrigerator, people would often still refer to the refrigerator as "the ice box."

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

ice feathers - Leftover bits of concentrate from a frozen drink mix, oftentimes confused with pulp.

e.g., This orange juice has so many ice feathers, you'd think it was a Margarita.

submitted by Krud

ice phantom - When a hockey players looks really great on the ice during a game, but does not appear attractive at all in person.

e.g., I was excited to meet #22 -- until I discovered he was nothing but an ice phantom.

submitted by Adrienne

ice puddle - A patch of ice that is half frozen and yet half a puddle of water.

e.g., Watch out for that ice puddle.

submitted by Addie Myer

ice wrench - One who ignores all fire alarms, be they drills or no, sometimes extending into direct denial of danger.

e.g., Joey was the biggest ice wrench in school. Every fire drill him and some of his friends would play poker in the library. He's in Ward C of the burns unit if you want to go visit him.

submitted by Ochre Orientis

ice-a-lanche - The annoying clump of crushed ice that accumulates at the bottom of a glass or paper cup which, when tilted and tapped on the bottom, inevitably drops onto your face, down your sweater, into your crotch, etc. -- generally refreshing parts that didn't necessarily need to be refreshed.

e.g., Ice-a-lanches are frequently known to occur in crowded movie theaters and finer dining establishments.

submitted by julian

iceberger - A person who melts away the perplexing questions surrounding large floating bodies of solid dihydrogen monoxide.

e.g., Andy Bliss is a world renowned expert on ice and has been given the title The Imperial Iceberginator by his fellow Icebergers during long summer evenings on the Taylor Glacier.

submitted by J.B.

iceburg - Iceberg. With the suffix burg being far commoner in English than berg, why not have iceburg as an official alternative spelling?

e.g., More and larger iceburgs farther north than usual will be used by both sides of global warming as evidence for their positions. Ain't it wunnerful what you can get away with when you rely on manipulated data and models rather than observations and real scientific evidence?

submitted by HD Fowler

icecube iq - An IQ not greater than the temperature of ice cubes (32 degrees F).

e.g., You think Gary Condit must have an icecube IQ? How about the people he represents?

submitted by Wayne Hagood

iced out - To be wearing diamonds set in platinum.

e.g., That pimp is iced out.

submitted by zak

icefreezey - The brain pain (or freeze) you get from eating ice cream too fast. Icefreezy.

e.g., I got an icefreezey after I ate the ice cream too fast.

submitted by Raina

icehouse - An alternative word for "cool" or "interesting," invented by the people at VH.

e.g., I heard this song the other day that I thought you might enjoy. It was icehouse.

submitted by Mischa - (www)

iceman - Friend who has nerves of steel.

e.g., The iceman over here didn't even flinch when I threw it at him.

submitted by Quigs

icerage - The anger you feel when your kids put an empty ice cube tray back into the freezer.

e.g., I flew into an icerage when I found the empty tray.

submitted by Mark C

ichi hato - (Japanese "one heart"; adv. & interj.) A phrasal metaphor meaning approximately "And now the battle is real," or "This is your last chance." Sometimes also used to mean "watch out!" [From the video-games convention of showing a player's "lives" or chances as red "hearts" which are lost one by one each time the player "dies" or "gets killed" (i.e., fails to reach the objective). In reality, of course, soldier and civilian have only one heart -- lose that one and the game is over. Thus, when the player of the game is reduced to one heart, the battle becomes "real" in the sense that there is in reality only one life to lose.] Oh, and "hato" (from English "heart") refers specifically to video game hearts; the Japanese word for the blood-pumping organ is called "shinzo."

e.g., Today, you're really in court, before a real judge. This isn't law school: Ichi hato.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

ichiban - A terrific name for a soothing Japanese skin ointment.

e.g., I couldn't stop scratching until my wife applied the Ichiban.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

icium - A substance or act that is extremely cold. From "ice" + "-ium," the suffix used frequently when naming new elements.

e.g., Ice cream is best served in a manner similar to icium.

submitted by Liam Callaghan

ickgusting - Like disgusting, but icky.

e.g., Dad, that port-o-potty was ickgusting.

submitted by Jim

ickle - Little. To be used when describing small, cute things.

e.g., Awww, look at the ickle kitten.

submitted by Thonoir

ickle - Little.

e.g., She couldn't reach the cookie jar because she was ickle.

submitted by Jenn Atkins

icktified - Icky, gross, yuck

e.g., This milk is old, it's icktified.

submitted by Tony

icky little smoke troll - A chain smoking, creepy, short individual -- a huge mistake of a date.

e.g., The icky little smoke troll seduced me with her sensual voice . . . but her callipygous appearance didn't hurt her chances in the slightest.

submitted by Voice_of_Reason

icky vicky - A babysitter from Hell, as it were, especially if teenaged, and notorious for being cruel, sadistic, and even heartless towards her charges to the point of hazing. (Dervied from the character on "The Fairly OddParents," a notoriously sadistic babysitter who has a foneness for tormenting Timmy Turner in the name of "love.")

e.g., Don't tell me you called Icky Vicky to babysit for me again. When will the torment end?

submitted by the daily phosdex - (www)

ickyboo - Square, unpleasant, revolting. 1960s UK slang, used in interviews by The Small Faces, who later went on to pen "Itchycoo Park."

e.g., The concert last night was ickyboo.

submitted by Adam Leslie

ickystickums - Icky and sticky.

e.g., Melting popsicles are all ... ah, ickystickums.

submitted by Magabrain

iconherent - A respected politician who won't change his political views no matter the music or who's doing the playing.

e.g., Senator Snort replied, "I know what you're trying to say but iconherent."

submitted by Charlie Lesko

iconoclantastic - Icon smashing fun. That is, you have a great time doing something that is iconoclastic or revolutionary.

e.g., Her idea for a foot race with no course is simply iconoclantastic.

submitted by futurebird - (www)

iconoclasp - The firm but friendly handshake of a movie star trying to get elected.

e.g., The actor's iconoclasp won him many votes despite his storied past.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

iconomize - Deleting unused icons from your desktop.

e.g., I iconomized my desktop as it had become cluttered with too many icons.

submitted by Mark Stephens

iconophagia - The practice of eating one's icons or totemic characters, especially lobsters.

e.g., We left Lobby outside the shellfish restaurent -- as a lobster, he wouldn't have wanted to witness the rampant iconophagia inside.

submitted by Lobby

iconophilist - A collector, designer, and lover of icons -- the computer variety. To be honest, the only icon I've designed is the one for the pseudodictionary.

e.g., Yes, not only am I a lexiconophilist, I'm also an iconophilist. Fortunately, icons are cheaper than dictionaries.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

icow - International Conspiracy Of Women.The hidden organization that facilitates transmission of female dogma and gossip.

e.g., He: "Krikes! You were only in the ladies room for five minutes. How do you know so much about her?" She: "ICOW."

submitted by Gregory Bloom

ictheologist - A student of religion who fishes for compliments; also, one whose beliefs are fishy.

e.g., The ictheologist believed strongly that God is a fish and expected to be lauded for so believing.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

ictnosis - Similar to zoonosis, ictnosis is any infectious disease that is able to be transmitted or applied (by a vector, media, or other form) from any information communication technology (software or hardware or resulting emissions including but not limited to audible and inaudible sounds, visible, infrared and other lights, radio or micro wave lengths. . . .) to a human.

e.g., The most recent case of ictnosis in Utopia involved a new strain of the worm X.w.21 which infected thousands of homes and appliances, reaching as far as 250 human cases and 3 fatalities.

submitted by Philippe VELTSOS - (www)

id (ten) t error - Most common computer error.

e.g., Oh, you have a "ID10T" error. (IDIOT)

submitted by stump_fungus

id 10 t - The category code for "Incedibly Stupid Question From User'

e.g., "'Hey I just had to go fix someones PC but he had just forgotten to turn the monitor on, what is the code for that?' 'Just put down ID10T.' Or maybe 'Het Tom we have an ID 10 T on line 3."

submitted by Robin Hart-Jones

id poor - Lacking proper documentation. Associated with illegal alien status.

e.g., The whole van full of people who had crossed the border from Mexico were id poor.

submitted by Michael Hutchinson

id ten t - Common term describing one who repeatedly forgets his password.

e.g., Computer help desk to caller: "Okay then, I'll reset your password to ID TEN T. Be sure to write it down so you can remember it -- ID10T."

submitted by DSW

id-10-t error - Used when describing an unkonown user error.

e.g., "You seem to be having an ID-10-T error," said the help desk to the end user.

submitted by Jester101

id10t error - Pronounced "eye dee ten tee." A common computer error caused when the user has no idea what he's doing.

e.g., She mistyped her password and claimed the computer wouldn't take it. It was an ID10T error.

submitted by Tim

idea hamster - A person who always appears to have her idea generators running.

e.g., The new temp is so eager to please she's become an idea hamster.

submitted by Drew T.

idear - Commonly referred to as an idea of lesser extent.

e.g., What's the big idear?

submitted by Zachary D Manprin

identifiction - 1. False identity, fictional identity. 2. Same as phonynym. I'm sure it isn't original, but I've never seen it before.

e.g., Not only do I never give out my Social Security Number except as required by law, I've been known to use an identifiction.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

ideocentric - Belief that one's one ideas are superior to others' ideas.

e.g., If one is too ideocentric and does not explore the merits of her opponents' ideas merely because she believes her own idea is superior, she is destined to walk away from disagreements having learned little.

submitted by Ethan Stone

ideolectical - An adjective that can be utilized to describe a word, phrase, or other part of one's vocabulary that is characteristic of that person's language usage, and is thus part of her ideolect. Also used to describe the usage of the item or items.

e.g., Rove's repetitive and ideolectical usage of the ideolectical phrase "What the...?" has become renowned among Australian television watchers.

submitted by Genevieve Williamson

ideologicalize - To turn any and every argument into an ideological issue.

e.g., His tendency to ideologicalize even mundane discussions has cost him many friends.

submitted by Vidyalankar

ideoskeptic - One who is skeptical of all ideologies. One who is non-ideological. (Submitted from a screenname seen at www.military.com. Tracked to http://entre_nous.typepad.com/about.html.)

e.g., His description of himself: "A former Belgian in his forties who studied in the States and is presently living in the Middle East. I used to be a leftist until quite thoroughly mugged by reality. I did not so much become a 'neoconservative' as an ideoskeptic by the experience. If label me you must, call me an 'engineerist' or a 'radical pragmatic centrist.' :-)"

submitted by HD Fowler

ideotsyncrany - The uncanny nature of stupid things happening simultaneously. {ED. Who am I to say how this pseudo-word should be spelled? It's not my neologism.}

e.g., The stupid acts of two people are bound to collide and form one spectacularly idiotic event, an ideotsyncrany.

submitted by James

ider - idea

e.g., i have no ider

submitted by Melissa

idgara - I Don't Give A Rat's Ass.

e.g., Friend is telling a pointless story. Your response: "You know what? IDGARA." (So much for that "friend.")

submitted by xgangstaxbuddiex

ididntmentadodat - The react after wrongfully deleting a program file or just before slamming the car door shut with your keys inside.

e.g., "Are you sure you want to delete?" (Yes.) Oops, Ididntmeanttododat.

submitted by Gregory Germany

idiocracy - The state of most businesses. |  
 
A government, state, or bureaucratic union controlled, dominated, or led by abject idiots. |  
 
Administration of a government chiefly through nonelected idiots. The idiots and their officials as a group: promised to reorganize the federal idiocracy. Management or administration marked by hierarchical idiots in numerous offices and by fixed stupid procedures: The ineffective administrative structure of a large or complex organization: a midlevel idiot in a corporate bureaucracy. An administrative system in which obsessive desire or inclination to follow completrely ludicrous, rigid and unnecessarily complex procedures impedes effective action: innovative ideas that get bogged down in red tape and idiocracy. |  
 
A state in which 
-- most people don't vote; 
-- food stamp recipients purchase lottery tickets; 
-- failure is not recognized in public education, but rather deferred until after graduation; and 
-- charity is involuntary, unselective, and repressive and is extracted via the IRS. 
 
In short, the populace is disenchanted and ambivalent and has forsaken its authority and self-interest to vacant land lards, petty LAN lords, and faceless trans-national transfat business entities. | What we'd have for sure if Joe Biden ever became POTUS.

e.g., That organization is run by top level idiots; it is an idiocracy. |  
 
Subjugated by an idiocracy beyond her control, she tried in vain to find employment. |  
 
She often complained about the Federal idiocracy's complete lack of effectiveness. |  
 
Lamenting the sate of the disunion, he raised his glass and slurred a eulogy for the late, great, and last idiocracy.

submitted by Brenda Willenborg | Andrea Hackett | Ch

idiodidactiphone - "A foolish information provider on your telephone."

e.g., If your telephone etiquette -- or lack thereof -- involves being an idiodidactiphone, please mend your ways . . . you prolixety-split speedtalking prestodigitator.

submitted by [Steve] - (www)

idiodyssey - Initially a humorous mispronunciation of "idiocy'." The journey of a fool, soon to be parted from his or her money.

e.g., You bought your wife a Faberge Egg from a man in a trenchcoat? You certainly were on an idiodyssey that day!

submitted by Seam

idiofoolmorocretin - Someone so unremittingly stupid that given the choice between breathing in and breathing out her mind will explode. Also used to describe anyone attempting to read a computer manual.

e.g., You idiofoolmorocretin, there is no way that you can read that--for starters, it's upside down.

submitted by Fenix

idiom - Another way of saying, "They're stupid."

e.g., Q:"What do you think of politicians?" A:"Idiom."

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

idiomatic - To respond to something automatically that shows you are an idiot.

e.g., Jumping off a bridge because all your friends do is idiomatic.

submitted by Craig Dodge

idiont - A person with poor spelling or written grammar skills (idiontic, idioncy)

e.g., Laurie is an idiont; she can't spell at all.

submitted by RJ

idiopath - Someone who is obsesively stupid.

e.g., Pauly Shore is an idiopath.

submitted by virgio

idiopocrite - An individual or group of people who demand respect -- yet in the very same moment label and criticize the individuality of another, ultimately insulting their own intelligence (or lack thereof).

e.g., Don't you just hate dealing with an idiopocrite? I've never understood how one could spout out so much self-righteous idiopocrisy, and remain fully unaware of how unintellectual they proved themselves to be

submitted by Amber H. & Sergio R. - (www)

idiosec - The brief moment of time when something that you want to prevent is happening, you realize it, but you don't have enough time to react.

e.g., In the idiosec as he gently closed the car door, locking his keys inside, he was able to release a quiet whimper.

submitted by Richard Alpert - (www)

idiosis - (id-ee-oh-sis; n.) 1. The quality or state of being an idiot; 2. The processes involved in the being or becoming an idiot; 3. Idiocy, viewed as a disease; 4. The gradual acceptance of a stupid idea by the members of a particular group (a mob, a class, a team, a socioeconomic group, a society, a civilization, vel cet.) [From IDIOT + -OSIS "state or quality."]

e.g., The world today suffers an epi---no, a pandemic of idiosis: we choose warfare over humanity, sullen acquiescence over active participation, rights over duties, and wants over needs. | "I believe we can solve the whole of our nation's budgetary woes by octupling the cost of postage stamps." "Stay back, everybody, I think it's a raging case of idiosis."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

idiosyncratic - When two or morons do things at the same time.

e.g., Those guys were so dumb they could make being idiosyncratic an olympic event.

submitted by Craig Dodge

idiot sandwich - a gathering or a meeting of fools sitting together having a stupid discussion

e.g., the meeting b/w the backstreet boys and n'sync turned out to be an idiot sandwich

submitted by Saurabh Chandrashekhar

idiotasy - In a state of being a complete idiot.

e.g., I won't sink to that Chris's level of idiotasy.

submitted by Cindi

idiotic - The part of the inner ear that prevents you from acting rationally.

e.g., John's idiotic had made a fool of him once again.

submitted by Craig Dodge

idioticness, idiotickness - A way of making someone feel better if she has done or said something stupid; akin to " Hey, nobody's perfect." The irony lies in the fact that you seem to criticize her, but you use a word that doesn't exist.

e.g., Friend: "Oops, I pulled on the door that says 'Push.'" You: "That was pure idioticness."

submitted by Kroz

idiotocracy - Literally, rule by idiots. Specifically, a society which proposes itself as being democratic yet submits to the apathy of the lowest common denominator and thus becomes ruled by either despotic, unintelligent, or otherwise incompetent beings. The United States since 1992 has approached an idiotocracy.

e.g., Having devolved into an idiotocracy, the United States finds itself on the brink of another social revolution.

submitted by adam jagiellowicz

idiotsyncrasy - That time when 2 or more people make the same mistake.

e.g., Approaching the entrance to the bank, in a moment of idiotsyncrasy, the two of them absently pushed on the door clearly marked "PULL."

submitted by ashsimmonds

idisilliot - A silly idiot

e.g., Chris is an idisilliot.

submitted by wackadoo

idjit - Used by Looney Tunes' Yosemite Sam. Usually said when in a frustrated state of mind.

e.g., You put regular bleach in with the colored clothes? You idjit.

submitted by T. - (www)

idk - I don't know

e.g., idk what your talking about.

submitted by Beowulf

idky - I don't know why

e.g., idky you did such a stupid thing.

submitted by Beowulf

idle-ville - A place where people go when they space out. Also used when someone on your buddy list is not responding or is classified as idle.

e.g., I see you finally got out of Idle-ville. It's been like 5 hours.

submitted by Scott

idleismically - To do something in an idle fashion.

e.g., He idleismically added a word or two to the pseudodictionary.

submitted by obscurity - (www)

idmalformity - A broken id.

e.g., My idmalformity makes me feel different than other people . . . and animals . . . and plants . . . and planets . . . and other stuff three.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

idnit - "Isn't it?" A phrase used to indicate consensus on an idea or thought. Agreement.

e.g., This website is cool, idnit?

submitted by Mark Clardy

idollartree - A worship of very cheap merchandise -- almost 100% made in China.

e.g., Like most good American girls, Annie was brought up with a real legion of retail department stores. But then she fell into Idollartree.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

ids - Imminent Death Syndrome; when you feel compelled to be really nice to someone because she's dying (or maybe just sick).

e.g., I had to watch TV with Bill all day because he's got I.D.S.

submitted by ditnis

idt - I don't think. {ED. Three words that you're extremely unlikely to ever hear me use in that order. (Almost wrote "juxtaposed that way," which is what I thought of first.)}

e.g., Idt that I'm going to buy a new keyboard.

submitted by Ali - (www)

idustration - An illustrated idea, a visualization of a concept that doesn't exist.

e.g., I don't know what you mean. Can you draw me an idustration?

submitted by Andrew

idwhotihasco - From idea whose time has come. Pronounced "id-woti-asko" and rhymes with "fiasco." Not to be confused with idwhotihasneco, which is an idea whose time has nearly come (like, say, on-demand streaming movies to the home, flying cars, or one device that's a media player, digital camera, PDA, and phone.)

e.g., Steve Jobs is too scared of his own bad taste to mix and match his clothes. In many ways he's a deeply dysfunctional individual. But a side-effect of his dysfunction is an uncanny knack for spotting idwhotihascos, be they desktop publishing, digital photography, or, more recently, personal music players.

submitted by alan - (www)

iff - "If and only if." Used in math and logic to state necessary and sufficient conditions for something to occur or exist.

e.g., "Iff you ask me out, then I will go out with you."

submitted by mike sedita

iffect - Can be used as a substitute for either effect or affect

e.g., Edward had a large iffect on the world.

submitted by Justin OVercash

iffied - To waste money on something that just fizzles out or was not worth the effort

e.g., The International Film Festival of India at Goa (IFFI) was iffied.

submitted by John

iffin, iffen - A form of the word "if"; used in direct address when the speaker wants to persuade an audience by being cutesy. Inspired by the Irish.

e.g., We could all meet at Julie's apartment iffin you'd like.

submitted by Carla Curtsinger

iffits - Unidentified food. "If we've got it, you can have it -- if we haven't, you can't."

e.g., Q.What's for tea, Mum? A. Bread and iffits.

submitted by Alison

iffteen - A word used when you don't know how much the amount actually is

e.g., "Hey Jim, how much is this vase?" "Oh, I don't know, maybe iffteen bucks."

submitted by Arch3r

ifnik - Someone whose life, habits, and thinking are constructed conditionally.

e.g., Don't ask him what he's going to do. A typical ifnik, he will give you a dozen of "ifs."

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

ig-moe - Idiot, moron, dumber then the rest of us.

e.g., That guy -- whatsisname? Dudley? is not only a dud, he's also an ig-moe.

submitted by jennifer nix - (www)

iggifoy - I've gotta get in front of you -- for a driver who insists on passing everyone. Often used in combination with expletives.

e.g., Driving to work would be a pleasant experience . . . if it weren't for all the damned iggifoys.

submitted by Steve

iggins, the - Typing error typified by misplacement of the letter "g"' in words ending in '"-ing." Also igns.

e.g., Did you say somethign? Whoops, got the iggins tonight.

submitted by BigAssFries

ight - Another way to say "all right." Slang, short version.

e.g., I got this. Ight.

submitted by nina

igloom - Unilluminated igloo. Igloo + gloom.

e.g., The iglooms were barely visible in the snowmobile headlight's glare due to the intensifying snowstorm.

submitted by Scott Secord - (www)

ignant - Ignorant.

e.g., I can't believe she could be so ignant.

submitted by Mike Singson

ignert - Ignorant. Hick pronunciation, although usually used humorously or sarcastically.

e.g., You ignert savage. Don't you know stripes don't go with plaid.

submitted by EggieChan

ignertate - Said of a person who is so ignorant she is irritating.

e.g., The drivers in this state are so ignertating.

submitted by Staford J. Young

igniparous - Bringing forth fire.

e.g., "We were all amazed at Mr. Copperfield's act until we discovered a box of matches up his sleeve."

submitted by HD Fowler

ignis flatus - Flaming fart. An existing fart-related construction that meets the PseudoDictionary's high standards for acceptance of fart synonyms -- blah, blah, blah. Useful as an erudite flame for some message boards where its meaning could be discerned.

e.g., I've heard that the methane gas in human flatus can be ignited to produce a blue flame, but I've never seen it myself. Caution: Experiments with ignis flatii should be tried only at home -- or in a dorm room. Please.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

ignobubble - The virtual space of ignorance in which one keeps herself enclosed.

e.g., She strolled through that year, secure in her ignobubble, never facing her friend's not-so-subtle hints and the very real signals coming from her boyfriend.

submitted by Barb Eales

ignominite - Ignominite ĭg-nō'-mĭn-īt - n. A mineral, soluble in alcohol. (Derived from "ignominy.") When ingested, attenuates operation of judgment centers instrumental in mediating common ssense, generosity, altruism, and cooperation, causing ascendance of cynicism, greed, and cruelty.

e.g., Public health officials in Washington, DC, report an increase in Ignominite consumption, beginning in 2000.

submitted by Robert DiGrazia

ignoral - A deliberate snub.

e.g., My boyfriend's old girlfriend gave me an ignoral when we saw her at the party.

submitted by ann

ignoranceum - Total package of being ignorant

e.g., He displays his ignoranceum when it comes to shopping.

submitted by nemrac senoirb

ignoranimus - A somewhat illiteragitimate rabbits' term for an idiot.

e.g., What a maroon, what a simpleton, what an ignoranimus.

submitted by Steve Zihlavsky(credit to Bugs Bunny-or

ignorant slut - Originating in the late 70s on SNL, this phrase is used to point out the amusing ignorance of a person in a lighthearted and mildly hilarious fashion.

e.g., Jane, you ignorant slut.

submitted by weaponzero - (www)

ignoranti - The exact opposite of "illuminati." The ignoranti are an unorganized cadre of uneducated, uninformed or ill-informed, magical-thinking, irrationalists who have a belief system that depicts the real physical world or cosmos however they wish or have been taught by their peers, family, or culture -- that is to say, most of the general religious public.

e.g., On the subject of evolution, the ignoranti have extreme difficulty accepting the fact that humans and the other primates such as chimpanzees, gorillas, baboons, and orangutans had the same distant ancestor despite the overwhelming fossil and DNA evidence.

submitted by John S. Duckering - (www)

ignoranus - Someone who is both ignorant and an asshole. | A person who's both stupid and an asshole. (Washington Post Style Invitational.) | Eric Holder.

e.g., The new boss is an ignoranus. | Damn, I do get tired of ignoranuses incapable of presenting their position fairly responding to their distorted versions of what I said rather than responding to what I said. As Tom P said all those many years ago, "No, not in other words. If I had wanted to use other words, I would have used them." | If Ray cribbed this word from a newspaper without giving credit, does that make him an ignoranus? I think it does.

submitted by Ray - (www)

ignorement - Ignoring something or somebody. Corresponding to the verb "ignore," but different from ignorance -- which is derived from ignore, but has a different meaning, "lack of knowledge."

e.g., I hoped to receive forgiveness but instead was met with suspicion and ignorement. Your son's continual ignorement of his civil duties needs to be noticed and reprimanded. The government shows the same ignorement towards human lives as towards human rights.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

ignormals - People who ignore and are ignorant - and are considered model citizens.

e.g., It's not that I think politics isn't interesting. It's just that I'm an ignormal. I find talk of bad things really - you know - stressful - and bad for my energy.

submitted by Todd - (www)

ignosecond - The moment in time when you realize that you just did something really stupid.

e.g., I realized the keys where in the car the ignosecond the door slammed shut.

submitted by pam

ignote - (v) ehg-note. To make dumber by saying or doing something.

e.g., "Bob's okay, but his inane comments continue to ignote me." "I was completely ignoted by that movie."

submitted by Semi

ignote - It pretty much means "deny" or "refuse." "Ignoted" would mean denied or not accepted. Anything along those lines.

e.g., She ignoted Chris when he asked her out. Good for her.

submitted by Taraneh

ignoxious - A person who knows nothing about the subject at hand yet continues to speak with authority. He is both ignorant and obnoxious.

e.g., When Terry speaks, he can be ignoxious.

submitted by chrisanna

ignoy - To ignore someone so that it annoys them.

e.g., When my husband is talking to me and I don't pay attention to what he is saying I am actually "ignoying" him.

submitted by Jamie

igry - Painfully embarrassed for or uncomfortable about someone else's incredibly poor social behavior or unfortunate circumstances. Descriptive of such behavior or circumstances. Over the past ten years, users have unconsciously determined the noun form to be either "igritude," "igriness," or just "igry."

Update, from another creator igry adj. igriness, igrier, igriest [We in the puzzle world -- especially those of us who have ever spent more than 5 minutes reading the rec.puzzles newsgroup -- loathe the "gry" puzzle. So a bunch of us (John Chaneski, Peter Gordon, Kevin West, and myself, if I recall correctly) decided that we should make up a word, so that if anyone ever asked us the goddamn -gry riddle, we could just shrug and say, "Oh, don't you know? It's the word we made up. I thought everybody knew that."] "Igry" basically means "painfully embarrassed for or uncomfortable about someone else's behavior, or descriptive of such behavior." Like, say you're at a restaurant, and one of the people at your table summons the waiter by snapping their fingers. Watching this makes you die a little inside. You feel igry. (Or you might think, "What an igry thing to do.") Another usage example: "That was the igriest episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm yet." Some have argued that it feels wrong for the same adjective to apply to both the person feeling igry and the person doing something igry. To those people I point out the words "nauseous" (which means both "causing nausea" and "affected by nausea") and "suspicious."
ED. Plenty of folks will object to the claims about "nauseous," but that might amount to no more than a quibble here.

e.g., "At that point I couldn't stop the goofy little guy from trying to impress the busty waitress, so I just sat there feeling igry."

From LanguageHat, January 28, 2004: I generally have no interest in the cute coinages people keep coming up with, usually by blending two other words to achieve some strained and unnecessary meaning: beducation or whatever. Every once in a while, though, somebody invents a word that meets a hitherto unrealized need; such a word was Walpole's "serendipity" (first written down in a letter of January 28, 1754, exactly 250 years ago today!), and such a word (or prospective word) is "igry," invented by John Chaneski, Peter Gordon, Kevin West, and Francis Heaney some time back with the meaning "painfully embarrassed for or uncomfortable about someone else's incredibly poor social behavior, or descriptive of such poor social behavior."

submitted by John Chaneski - (www)

igsanity - Igsanity is being in the state of careless or ignorant insanity. It was created out of necessity for a word to describe both insanity and ignorance.

e.g., The igsanity of the drugged motorist caused a man to be hit and then lodged into the hood of the car. Due to this igsanity the driver continued on with the person in the hood for fear of being caught by the police rather than seeking medical help for the injured pedestrian.

submitted by Anthony Dion Mitzel

ihatetocookitis - What those who would rather eat out than make dinner have.

e.g., My sister has ihatetocookitis.

submitted by Laura

iight - South Philly slang for "all right."

e.g., Mom: Clean your room! Son: Iight, chill!

submitted by

ijit, idjit - Idiot.

e.g., Matt is an ijit.

submitted by Matt Almeida

ijulaikra - (pronounced ee-july-kruh; n.) 1. Uncovering the future (which is quite a bit harder than digging up the past) through hypothesis and projection. 2. Adopting, insofar as possible, the perspective of someone from the past as to later advances (or losses). 3. Imagining the excavation of our present “civilization” by future archaeologists. (Ijulaikra is archaeology pronounced backwards.)

e.g., I had the kids do an exercise in ijulaikra today in class: They had to come up with a hypothesis that future archaeologists might come up with given some modern artifacts, like soda cans, plastic six-pack rings, and a bunch of little plastic soldiers. | You know, speaking ijulaikraically, people from ancient Greece could recognize some of our technology for what it is; they might not be as primitive as you seem to think, believing all this to be some kind of magic.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

ikeage - Ikeage is the pile of cardboard, plastic bags, and Allen wrenches you have after unpacking your Scandinavian furniture.

e.g., While assembling my multi-module desk I realized I was short an important metal connector and had to scramble through the heap of ikeage to find it.

submitted by Richard Factor - (www)

iknoresteyu - (n.; ik-no-res-TAY-oo) a plot device---such as a fingerprint, a dna sample, a picture, a scent, or something---that somehow unrealistically, simplistically, or absurdly leads to a remarkable leap of logic, a quick solution, or an amazing realization. [From the play "The Libation Bearers" (Gk. Choephoroi) by Aeschylus, in which Electra, daughter of King Agamemnon and Clytemnestra, discovers that her brother Orestes has returned: This based upon her recognition of his footprint at her father's grave: in Greek, "ichnos Oresteou."]

e.g., "The 'evil twin' was a clone?" "Yeah, and before you say it's unrealistic, they went through the process precisely." "How did the clone get to be an adult?!" "Oh ... well, they sped up the aging process." "And that's credible science?---it's another iknoresteyu, man: it's ridiculous!" "Haven't you ever heard of suspension of disbelief?" "Sure: Samuel Taylor Coleridge's Biographia Literaria, 1817. I'm fine with suspending disbelief, but not hanging it by the neck until dead."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

iksvie - The Roman numeral XVI, as in Pope Benedict XVI.

e.g., Check it out. You'll find Pope Benedict Iksvie being referred to as a benedictator.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

iladilfakudecide - having great difficulty in coming to a decision over something simple like what shade of blue to use on your school project

e.g., i am suffering great iladilfakudecide over which apple looks nicest

submitted by The Weirdio

ilea - A female pig.

e.g., My grandfather raises on his farm six ileas.

submitted by Johnny

ilfetriolus - Hatred for being shackled.

e.g., I think it's the sores on his ankles and wee steps he has to make wearing those shackles all the time why Steve has such ilfetriolus.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

iliform - Goofy; silly.

e.g., The illiform boy danced in a silly manner around his girlfriend.

submitted by Marvin - (www)

ill - Good, denoting approval.

e.g., The new Ice Cube album is ill!

submitted by ditnis

ill nation - The complete compendium of what is cool in the Hip Hop spectrum, spanning everything from slang and lexicon, to music and fashion. Very subject to change.

e.g., Punky thinks he's ill nation with his baggy jeans and sideways baseball cap.

submitted by Paul

illeagal - Illegal. A not uncommon misspelling.

e.g., I don’t have to look at the video or read the story to know that she’s an illeagal Aisian [sic]. They all want favors but they never get your order right.

submitted by [Whiteisrite] - (www)

illeagle - A very big, sick bird.

e.g., You'll have to take the illeagle through the back door at the veterinarian's. Too many small animals in the waiting room to take a chance going through there.

submitted by HD Fowler

illegal alien - An illegal alien is a foreigner who is in a country illegally. Recording the term before it becomes obsolete and can be found only in antiquarian or unabridged dictionaries.

e.g., I sneaked into Mexico as a teenager in 1971, making me an illegal alien. Lucky for me I didn't get caught.

submitted by beelzebub

illegal combatant - Definition from Wikipedia: "... a person who engages in combat without meeting the requirements for a lawful combatant according to the laws of war as specified in the Third Geneva Convention." An illegal combatant is not entitled to the same protections and rights as a civilian. An "unpriviliged belligerent."

e.g., The detainees at Gitmo are considered to be illegal combatants unless they can prove otherwise.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

illegalez - All galez not following the strict regulations of the Free Galez Foundation (FGF). See also http://n.ethz.ch/student/simonrei/galez/.

e.g., All your illegalez are belong to us.

submitted by Daniel Sutter - (www)

illegals - Persons under the age of 18. | Illegal aliens, particularly in the United States. | Informal: shorthand for illegal alien, illegal immigrant. Someone whose presence in the United States is a violation of immigration law. Repeated due to the recent "Ban the I-word" movement.

  
How can anyone deny that it's bad behavior that results in illegal immigrants -- who should rightly be called either illegal aliens or criminal aliens -- or maybe just illegals? Negligent behavior at best for those who overstay their visas. Bad if they overstay for more than a short time. I was taught -- weren't you -- that you punish bad behavior and reward good behavior. If you reward bad behavior, you encourage more bad behavior -- and you will get it.

e.g., The Olsen twins are illegals. | California's illegal alien population was estimated at 1.7 million in 1994. That followed the Census Bureau's 1992 estimate of 3.4 to 3.8 million illegals in the United States. Before the Immigration Reform and Control Act of 1986 went into effect, estimates were 3 to 5 million. The estimates these days are always ≥11 million, and some go much, much higher. | Illegals in certain circumstances are now called dreamers -- and have virtually the same rights as United States citizens, excluding the legal right to vote. Can that be far away? | Don't call me an illegal. People are not illegal. Saying so is a hate crime.

submitted by ditnis - (www)

illegible - Speaking hesitantly or nonsensically.

e.g., He was so illegible that he couldn't remember what soda was called.

submitted by Nikolai - (www)

illegiterate - Iillegitimate" and "illiterate" -- a dumb bastard.

e.g., I am an illegiterate on a computer.

submitted by harry orbes

illeglian - People who do illegal things.

e.g., That girl texting while driving is an illeglian.

submitted by Tyler - (www)

illegniscity - Full of wrong-doing intentions, criminal-mindedness, or craziness. Wackiness in the face of strange obstacles. Commonly occurs after heavy drinking or concerts at shady arenas. Used to describe minor crimes which are out of character for the perp.

e.g., "I'm going to put a live deer on that car," said Henry. "No, you can't. What are you, full of illegniscity? That's not like you at all. You're usually all about the legal."

submitted by Morgan

illicit - A sick lawyer.

e.g., The barrister was suffering terribly, thus becoming illicit.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

illiciticity - The quality -- or degree -- of being illicit.

e.g., His action had a high degree of illiciticity.

submitted by Jon K. Hart - (www)

illighterate - Used to describe the person utterly incapable of producing a flame with a lighter.

e.g., Mike may be the most unlucky person in the world. He either never buys a lighter that works, or he's just illighterate.

submitted by BL

illiteragitimate - The term stupidicious unedjumicated folks might say instead of"illiterate."

e.g., Chris doant no wat ees sain, that thar boi's illiteragitmate.

submitted by Steve Zihlavsky

illiterati - Sadly, the modern equivalent of the literary intelligentsia, who have little or no ability to write without violating the prescribed standards of writing. Specifically, internet "writers" and "reviewers" who can't spell or construct a sentence.

e.g., Movie studios these days have to play their cards close to their chest lest they incur the wrath of the internet illiterati, who have the power to ruin their film's potential at the box office with one poorly written "review."

submitted by Christopher Moriarty - (www)

illiterative - Repeating the same misspelled word(s). Often online, and often by lamers or people who don't know better. Illiterate + iterative.

e.g., "ill send it too you to." "no." "y not? tougt u wanted it to." "my god, you're so illiterative."

submitted by Jesper - (www)

illmathematical - Maximum state of illness.

e.g., That flow was illmathematical.

submitted by andy

illmatical - very ill, but not quite as ill as 'illmathematical'

e.g., my new sweat pants are illmatical.

submitted by andy

illogy - A situation or occurrence which can be said to be illogical or which makes no sense.

e.g., Given that it is now mathematically impossible for your team to acheive promotion this year, your insistence that it will is clearly illogy.

submitted by Paul Tate

illucidate - A cross between illuminate and elucidate.

e.g., Please, illucidate me.

submitted by Doug Fanberg

illuminaughty - A group of lizards, disguised as people, who tread on your flower bed, never tidy their rooms, and hide your stapler when you need it. Unlike the Illuminati they actually exist, but are not terribly dangerous.

e.g., He knew he had been visited by the Illuminaughty when one of his socks vanished from the radiator.

submitted by Brave Sir Robin

illuminot - A conspiracy buster or debunker, usually a thing but could be a person.

e.g., Seeing the wreckage of the weather balloon should have proved that the "alien craft" flying around with "mind control lasers" was a bunch of illuminot.

submitted by Martin

illungiaticbus - For those times when you try to use toothpaste and you squeeze the tube and you know there's more left but you have to keep squeezing from the back and it takes so long and it's just too annoying.

e.g., I tried to brush my teeth this morning, but my toothpaste was illungiaticbus.

submitted by lauren

ima - can represent various forms such as 'I' 'I am' 'I am going to' & 'I have'

e.g., ""Ok, ima gonna go home now. see you later. Ima love you..Ima having some food""

submitted by DJ niJ - (www)

ima - a different way to say "i'm going to," usually implying some sort of physical violence. typically used in hip hop lyrics.

e.g., ima get you, foo. | ima kick your scrawny ass.

submitted by Paul Jarvis - (www)

ima - I am going to.

e.g., Ima go to the bathroom.

submitted by lauryn

ima - I'm going to, I shall, I will, I'll, etc.

e.g., "IF ROMNEY GETS ELECTED AND TAKES AWAY MY FOOD STAMPS IMA SEND SOMEONE TO MURDER HIS ASS."

submitted by HD Fowler

imagibang - Mentally envisioning sex with a person found attractive yet probably unattainable. Can be used by either gender for same or opposite sexes. It is an omni-use word.

e.g., "Did you see those cheerleaders?" "Yes, and I imagibanged them all!"

submitted by Tim Reinerman

imaginary morning sickness - (IMS) A woman pretending to feel ill in the morning so that her husband or boyfriend will be extra nice to her, like making a cup of coffee or breakfast.

e.g., Sorry I'm late. My wife had IMS this morning.

submitted by Dyske Suematsu - (www)

imaginectomy - Cutting that results in loss of imagination.

e.g., I've met too many people working in the "exact" sciences who have had imaginectomies.

submitted by Zeromay Zentroclo

imagineer, imagineering - From General Electric or Disney. Imaginative construction or progression. Used primarily by marketing and sales people to describe some "leap of faith" taken by someone with regards to a project. Word is a fusion of "imagine" and "engineer(ing)."

e.g., The project looks like it's going really badly. You need to do some serious imagineering on the details to get yourselves out of trouble.

submitted by Coofer Cat - (www)

imaginism - Someone or something that has a high level of imagination.

e.g., John's artwork was a piece of pure imaginism.

submitted by valerie

imaginorganism - Any imaginary life-form.

e.g., "Haylee, are you having fun with your friend?" "Yes." "You do know she's just an imaginorganism, right?" "No."

submitted by steve zihlavsky

imbareassed - Embarrassed.

e.g., I don't know whether I'm imbareassed by my spelling or because imbareassed.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

imbascil - Imbecile.

e.g., "Krystal," at the link provided, called Melissa Harris-Perry an imbascil.

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

imbesire - Mix of imbecile and sire. One who is at once a person of wealth and status and at the same time an imbecile. Can also be used in regard to a person of supreme idiocy, a king of imbeciles so to speak.

e.g., Mom has a new boyfriend, but I think she is just with him because of his wealth and status. After speaking with him for five minuites, it was clear to me that he is an imbesire.

submitted by tony l.

imbiguer - It's a synonym of "to hinder" and "to impede". It's a verb. Sure there are already two words with similar meaning, but why not have a third?

e.g., The sun imbiguered by ability to see and caused me to run a light.

submitted by Jill Shuster

imbiguity - Ambiguity caused by the nature of instant messaging and its lack of tone or context.

e.g., It's difficult to express the concept of IMbiguity when you're IMing. But it's not the least bit difficult to be IMbiguous. It's difficult not to be.

submitted by Benjamin F Christen

imbisilly - Something that is so incredibly stupid that it's hilariously funny is imbisilly.

e.g., What Jane did was so incredibly imbisilly that I laughed so hard I got hiccups.

submitted by Tom Preston

imby - Used when you are about to say something and it completely slips your mind, and you're left trying to remember what you were about to say.

e.g., What was I going to say? I can't remember, another imby moment. This is happening more and more often since I retired.

submitted by david james

imconfidence - Privately, but not overtly or publicly confident about something.

e.g., Although she appeared to know nothing about the subject, she was brimming with imconfidence when she saw the test paper.

submitted by Desmond Smith

imdb - To use the interet movie database (imdb.com) to find something.

e.g., Bryan: How old is Tom Hanks. Jay: Imdb it.

submitted by Quigs

imdb - As a verb: To look up someone in the Internet Movie Data Base.

e.g., Some whippersnapper thought Kevin James belonged on a short list of the greatest comedians ever? Kevin James? Who the hell is Kevin James? I IMDbed him and found out he was the male lead in King of Queens, his main claim to fame. More recently he's made some not-so-good movies. Yeah, right. One of the greatest comedians ever. Sure he is.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

imeweus - All purpose pronoun.

e.g., Imeweus like food. It was imeweus. Imeweus all went to the store after school.

submitted by John Hoffman

imf - International Mother Fund.

e.g., I'm our of money again. I'm going to go plead to the IMF.

submitted by pixilated - (www)

imfeasibubble - A bubble constructed entirely from nothing, thus, a completely ludicrous and absurd idea or concept.

e.g., "Why don't we make a goat-powered helicopter?" I stared at him incredulously. "That's completely imfeasibubble!" I shouted.

submitted by Ochre Orientis

iming - (v) To be instant messaging.

e.g., I was just iming her and she thought we should get together for a movie.

submitted by sao - (www)

iminoidal - Adjective to describe the shape of a slope-sided slab placed on top of a low wall--like a shallow roof.

e.g., Jack liked his new iminoidal wall--it stopped the kids from trying to tightrope-walk across it and falling into his petunias.

submitted by Pat Fox

iml - (n., pronounced “iml”) The American Sign Language sign for “I love you”, sometimes used as emoticon.

e.g., “I'll always remember the last time I saw her, waving an iml at me over the crowd in the airport.”

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

imma - Used to make "I am going to" shorter.

e.g., Imma go make something cool now.

submitted by gamenac - (www)

immaculant - Huge.

e.g., The biggest problem I have with Hummers is that they are immaculant.

submitted by Andrew

immaculate - A way of complimenting someone for gross incompetence.

e.g., Chris is an immaculate worker. He has no conception of what to do.

submitted by Haz

immaculate pre-conception - An idea born of nothing; one that has no basis in fact.

e.g., Chris's belief that he is better than everyone else is an immaculate pre-conception. He is, in fact, a loser.

submitted by Redbendad - (www)

immeadiately - Immediately, when you need beer.

e.g., Barmaid, bring me another brewski ... immeadiately.

submitted by Miss Speller

immelman, to pull an - A U-turn. Taken from the name of a manuver used by airplanes to accomplish much the same thing -- that is, a swift reversal of direction.

e.g., Wrong way. Just pull an Immelman -- no one's looking.

submitted by Air Gecko - (www)

immersive - Absorbing, enthralling. Despite its common usage, it's not a real word and does not show up in a dictionary.

e.g., The game was an immersive experience. I felt like I was really there.

submitted by Sketch - (www)

immigration dictionary - Where you can find plain English definitions of immigration-related legal terms from the common to the unusual. With over 400 terms, it is the most comprehensive immigration dictionary on the internet. Check the link.

e.g., Look it up in the immigration dictionary. I've provided a link.

submitted by Mark Alen - (www)

immination - The experience of hearing two or more coincidental references to something unusual within a short span of time.

e.g., I had an immination the day I finished a book by an obscure novelist--I learned he had died that morning.

submitted by Clay

imn't - I am not.

e.g., Robert: Ashley, you're a dork. Ashley: No, imn't.

submitted by Ashley Guio

imn't - A conjunction of the words "I am not." I'm a college graduate. I've used this word my whole life, been laughed at and ridiculed. But you know what? It makes sense to me. Now I can show everyone it actually is a word.

e.g., Mom: "If you hit your brother one more time, you're grounded." Me: "I imn't!"

submitted by Mary

imogen - A Little More Invention, Please

e.g.,

Of all the thousands of languages in the world, English has probably one of the largest vocabularies. This is not just the number of things, ideas, feelings, and states that the language can describe, but, like a hydra, one concept often spawns more than one word. Why say sea when you can say whale road? Why use only dog, when there are hounds, or harts instead of stags? Mogs and cats?

Not only that, but the number of dead words is nearly as large as the number ofliving ones — or perhaps as large or larger. Still more words are simply not used anymore — for example, slubberdegullion. Many readers thought Dumbledore was a great name for a wizard. Did Rowling make it up? Seems very unlikely, not because she’s not good at making things up, but because in the Cotswold region where she grew up, dumbledore is another way of saying bumblebee.

English is also filled with half-assed combinations. You know, where there is a word that suggests the other half of the equation has been lost. We have ruthless but no ruthful or ruth? We have unkempt, but where is kempt? Why can you be underwhelmed and overwhelmed, but never simply whelmed?

Our language has a great history of making stuff up. Take dog — who on earth knows where that one came from? No one. It was hund/hound for thousands of years … then suddenly it’s dog. We know the meanings of many words. Some come directly from other languages and cultures, such as juggernaut, sofa, and shampoo. Sometimes they get adopted more than once as the meaning changes in the country of origin — leading to hotel, hostel and hospital, which all have the same root. Others develop out of other languages such as Greek and Latin. Some words, such as pea (pease), cherry (cerise), penthouse (pentice), sweetheart (sweetard), and bridegroom (bryd-guma) are mistakes and mishearings.

Many words are just invented by creative types. Jeremy Bentham, best known for best seller guides such as Emancipate Your Colonies, invented the word “international” and then apologized for its inelegance. Shakespeare, for example is credited with having invented a whole raft of words:barefaced, critical, dwindle, gust, hint, lonely, and tons more.

For all their inventive quality, whether it is turning slang mainstream, playing with other languages, making stuff up, or just making a mess of things, the English language has not covered everything. There are gaps. Ones so huge, in fact, there is almost unlimited potential for wordsmiths to get creative — or as Elvis may have said, “time for a little more invention please.”

So what is English missing? Well, for starters, what comes between hard and soft? Normal does not quite cover it. How about between near and far? Here is not quite right either. Or, for that matter, between big and small/little? Is it normal again? Average? Other languages have managed to fill these voids.

A few years ago, a British writer working for the TV show QI, which stands for Quite Interesting, wrote a book called The Meaning of Tingo and Other Extraordinary Words from Around the World. The book compiled lists of words thematically, words that espoused themes, ideas and things English could not.

Some favourite gaps highlighted by Adam Jacot de Boinod include farik (a woman who hates her husband — there’s ‘normal’ again), muka (licking the lips to show that food is tasty), karoshi (death from overwork), radfahrer (one who butt kisses bosses, but bullies underlings), backpfeifengesicht (someone who has a face you just want to slap), and varevare (young and hopeless).

As well as gaps in the language, there are a number of areas that are dominated by dull, descriptive vocabulary. Think finance and business for example. Along with government, these sectors are stuffed full of jargon and management speak. This is a shame because there are many good things about business and about finance, such as when it comes to the best ways and places for moving finances, to transfer money, hire staff, sell the brand, and so on. What English needs is better ways to express these ideas without putting people to sleep.

So, squires: pens, pencils, keyboards, and crayons out — time to get smithing on new letter ensembles. Then, when you come up with something new, submit it to the PseudoDictionary for your fifteen minutes of fame.

submitted by - (www)

imogenial - Of or relating to the British pop star Imogen Heap.

e.g., My best friend makes this very imogenial music. She also uses very imogenial auto-tune equipment, and sometimes speaks with an imogenial (high-pitched, British) accent.

submitted by Star651

imoncutcha - Ah-mon-kuh-cha. Contraction of the phrase "I'm going to cut you." A ghetto threat. Rarely used, but hilarious in the right context. Observed in the Second Annual Yadda Yadda Yadda Blah Blah Blah Yackety-Shmackety Variety Show at Del Campo High School, Sacramento, CA.

e.g., You don't shut yo mouth, imoncutcha.

submitted by Zippy Von Zippy

imow - contraction of "I'm going to". southern

e.g., Imow have a PBR and watch some Springer.

submitted by susan witkofsky

imp - Cool, suave, and sophisticated.

e.g., Sean Connery was the best James Bond. He's always imp in the 007 movies.

submitted by Stanley - (www)

imp of the perverse - That which "forces you to do that which does not require to be done, to the defeat of everything else that should be done." Edgar Allan Poe || "The Imp of the Perverse is a metaphor for the common tendency, particularly among children and miscreants, to do exactly the wrong thing in a given situation. The impulse is compared to an imp (a small demon) which leads an otherwise decent person into mischief." The Imp of the Perverse is the converse of a shoulder angel such as Jiminy Cricket, who acted as Pinocchio's conscience.

e.g.,
My Imp of the Perverse kept urging me to search the internet for midget sex, though I knew I should really be attending my son's birth. || While I certainly won't 'fess up to being a miscreant, I'll admit to behaving at times as if the Imp of the Perverse is sitting on my shoulder. | A friend says my looks alternate between those of a cherub and those of The Imp of the Perverse.

submitted by Ochre Orientis || HD Fowler - (www)

impact - If you're using impact as a verb, a better choice is probably affect -- and by "probably," I mean "almost always." If you're using it as a noun, effect may well be a better choice.  
 
If you're talking about one thing striking another -- falling objects, getting shot, or jackhammers, for example -- impact is going to fit. Otherwise, you're unlikely to go wrong by avoiding its use as a verb entirely. If you simply must use it as a verb other than in the striking sense, restrict its use to very significant (great) effects. (Yeh, yeh, I know about impacted teeth. Ouch.)

e.g., Inferior: Cutting prices one percent will impact our bottom line. Better: Cutting prices one percent will affect our bottom line. Better yet: Why aren't we raising our prices instead of lowering them? We have the best product on the market.

submitted by HD Fowler

impact adjustment - An educated maneuver that "repairs" (usually temporarily) a piece of hardware via a swift smack or calculated drop (see "percussive maintenance").

e.g., If the VCR starts buzzing, just lift the front edge about an inch and drop it -- that's usually enough of an impact adjustment to make it stop.

submitted by Andy Eddy

impactful - To have a significant impact.  
 
{ED. Consider yourself well-advised not to use impactful -- unless you're making a little joke of using it and want to make people laugh. If you use it seriously, you may well be laughed at, anyway -- but you shouldn't be happy when that happens. This seems like a good place to remind you of what we've said elsewhere:

Do not believe anything you read in the pseudodictionary.
Do not take us seriously. Do not believe anything we say.
Seek wisdom elsewhere. Watch out for leg-pulling and tomfoolery.
This site is a lark for the owners and you always need to keep that in mind.

}

e.g., We've got to find a way to make these statements more impactful. {ED. We're screwed unless we find a way to say this more effectively.}

submitted by joemian

impactuous - Of or containing impact; either emotional (as in an emotive speech) or physical impact.

e.g., Your speech about 50 Cent certainly was impactuous, Earlene.

submitted by Ashley Sutton, Lee Minter

impassenger - The person sitting in a car whot tries to unlock the car door while another tries to open it from the outside. This results in the door remaining locked and entry into the vehicle still denied.

e.g., Damn. Thwarted again by an imbecile impassenger.

submitted by George Meyers

impasta - Someone who eats unleavened bread before Passover ends.

e.g., He ordered the rolls before remembering what day it was and then realized what an impasta he had become.

submitted by Joel Parker

impastrinate - To feed someone pastry. Noun forms include "impastrination" (the act of being impastrinated) and "impastrinator" and "impastrinatrix" (male and female, respectively, engaging in the act of impastrination).[From "im-," variant of "in-" from Latin "in" = "in, within" + "pastry" from Middle English "pastee" poss. from Old French "pastitz" = "cake"]

e.g., That sunny day, we strolled to the bistro down the street where we served ourselves coffee and then publicly impastrinated each other, first with an almond croissant and then a pain au chocolat, in quick succession.

submitted by Sara - (www)

impatience fee - Additional cost of a product stemming from the buyer's unwillingness to do the legwork to find a better price.

e.g., I paid $85 dollars for those hubcaps, including a $45 impatience fee there, 'cuz I'm sure I could have found them somewhere else for $40.

submitted by Heraldmonkey

impch - Measurement comparable to the size of an imp.

e.g., She was less than an impch high.

submitted by jon

impeccably peckable - The perfectly hen-pecked husband -- a hen-pecking wife's dream spouse.

e.g., Sigmund was so agreeable with everything -- yes even the constant nit-picking, nagging, and complaining of Lenore, his wife. On her part, Lenore was never happier than when she was complaining, and was never so secretly pleased with him as when she bitterly displeased with his every thought and action. Still, no complaint ever escaped Sigmund's lips. Truly, Sigmund was impeccably peckable.

submitted by Dennis R. Ridley

impedaphilia - When a minor is seeing someone over 40.

e.g., As I was walking down the street, I saw an act of impedaphilia.

submitted by talulah jung - (www)

impedestrian - A pedestrian who crosses the street very slowly so as to hold up traffic.

e.g., I was held up at 3rd and Main by a group of impedestrians.

submitted by Kate Fullerton

impedoom - Strange feeling of impending doom.

e.g., The night had been going well. However, on downing her fourth shot of tequila, Milly couldn’t help but get a feeling of impedoom about the remaining dark hours before morning would dawn. (See www.bulwer-lytton.com for more writing in this vein.)

submitted by Marv - (www)

impeeve - To impede someone in such a manner as to cause great annoyance.

e.g., My sister impeeves me every morning by running into the bathroom to take an hour-long shower, when she knows I'm late for class.

submitted by Becky Ferleman

impercussion - A combined form of "implication" and "repercussion"--an effect which is largely uncertain, but probably going to be bad.

e.g., The impercussions of Arctic National Wildlife Refuge drilling are not yet known.

submitted by David Hyatt - (www)

imperial doughnut - 1. A ring-shaped cake made of rich, light dough that is fried in deep fat and manufactured for consumption by minions of the evil Galactic Empire. 2. A convention-defying site containing traces of satirical wit, nostalgic insights on popular culture, and deep-thinking philosophical illusions of grandeur relating to a certain individual's so-called life.

e.g., Bob the Stormtrooper was gagging for an imperial doughnut after a hard day's rebel blasting on Hoth.

submitted by mike d - (www)

imperience - To purposely not pursue an endeavor or do something that is highly likely to bring success if actually done.

n. one's previous life focused on the things that one purposely did not do that could have brought the individual more success.

e.g., Speaking from my imperience in working with children, I know that getting them to like me first needs to come before I can expect any respect.

If you ever choose to imperience reading books, you know you will be sorry since you will soon regret your lack of knowledge and wisdom.

submitted by MD Caruso

imperior - 1. Between superior and inferior. 2. Something that has lots of flaws, but also good points.

e.g., The _Garbage Pail Kids_ movie is imperior to the original trading cards.

submitted by travis

impersenator - n - A political hack, masquerading as a statesman.

e.g., The new conservative majority in the House of Representatives at first appeared to be a new breed of politician, but now, they're looking more like a bunch of Impersenators.

submitted by Joe Kreiter - (www)

impervertous - Unable to be swayed by sexual come-ons or influences.

e.g., I am impervertous to the amorous temptations you subject me to.

submitted by Mark H

impeticos - (v) To pocket, impocket. OED says: a burlesque word put into the mouth of a fool. Applied as a perversion of impocket, and perhaps intended to suggest petticoat.

e.g., Used only once by Shakespeare, in _Twelfth Night_: "I did impeticos thy gratility."

submitted by ginny - (www)

impictinate - To imagine vividly.

e.g., Impictinate this, a perfect world with no crime, no pollution, and no famine.

submitted by Matthew

imping - The practice of repeatedly sending IM ping messages (e.g., "r u there?") because the other person has stopped replying.

e.g., I've been IMing the new blonde secretary a lot but I spend most of my time impinging her because she's answering the phone or handling reception.

submitted by Taka

implaqueable - Describing teeth that, no matter how poorly oral hygeine is maintained, are impervious to plaque and decay.

e.g., Despite the fact that he hardly brushes, and never flosses, Ned hasn't had a single dental issue in more than 30 years. How's that possible? Easy -- Ned's teeth are implaqueable.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

imposeter - A stupid question, one often asked when the answer is clearly visible or obvious. A poser that should not be; a not real question used as means of getting someone's attention or starting a conversation, the answer already being known by the asker.

e.g., "Hey, Bubba, what you doin'? Watchin' t.v.? What ya watchin'? . . . Is that Bugs Bunny? . . . What ya eatin'? VCereal?" "Sissy, I'm just not answering your imposeters."

submitted by steve zihlavsky