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chimpette - A fictional anthropomorphized sentient female chimpanzee character from _Planet of the Apes_.

e.g., Dr. Zira is a very intelligent chimpette, but she’s not as cute as Ari, from _Tim Burton’s _Planet of the Apes_.

submitted by ThyPentacle - (www)

chin music - In baseball, brushing back the batter with an inside pitch. Also used as a fist-fighting term.

e.g., The Big Unit played some chin music for Bagwell on that pitch.

submitted by david deaton

chin up - Short for keep your chin up. An American phrase meaning "Remain cheerful in a difficult situation." | From our Submit page:

e.g., "Keep your chin up. Don't take your troubles to bed with you - hang them on a chair with your trousers or drop them in a glass of water with your teeth." - [they were easily amused in Pennsylvania in 1900]. | From our Submit page: "If your invented word doesn't immediately catch on, keep your chin up. Remember, 'to deliberately invent a new word, without some foregoing suggestion or basis, and get it adopted, is one of the rarest events in the world, even in America, where men are continually attempting it.' That's just as true now as it was when it appeared in A Dictionary of Slang, Jargon & Cant in 1889." No capitals on the Submit page, because Marty and I have retained Paul's shiftless style in the presentation of the site.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

chin-dribbler - Similar to the "thigh-slapper" or "milk-snorter," a "chin-dribbler" is a joke or situation so funny that it makes you laugh so hard that you accidentally drool a bit.

e.g., Oh, you've gotta come and see what Kane can do with his eyelids. He turns them inside out. It's so funny it's a real chin-dribbler.

submitted by Christopher Moriarty

chinage - To rub or pat another person under the chin.

e.g., Ric's mother got upset when he gave her chinage.

submitted by dan bridges

chinaman's chance - Slim to no chance at all. Originally "Chinaman's chance in hell." Slang reflective of a time when Chinese workers in the American West could get only the most dangerous and difficult work, the term is often considered insulting and racist. |

Little to no chance at all -- roughly the same as the down-under "You've got Buckley's chance" or "You've got Buckley's." ("What are my chances of . . . going out with you?" "Buckley's.") The phrase seems to have come into common use in the mid- to late-nineteenth century when many Chinese laborers came to the United States to build railroads, dangerous work. The immigrants were paid very low wages and were treated poorly in other ways. Caucasian-dominated legislatures -- including the Congress of the United States -- passed laws preventing the immigrants from ascending the socio-economic ladder. God forbid that they be allowed to become citizens. There appear to have been efforts to deny citizenship to their American-born children as well, but I haven't pursued that tack yet.

From Wikipedia: "The Chinese Exclusion Act was a United States federal law signed by Chester A. Arthur on May 6, 1882, following revisions made in 1880 to the Burlingame Treaty of 1868. Those revisions allowed the U.S. to suspend Chinese immigration, a ban that was intended to last 10 years. This law was repealed by the Magnuson Act on December 17, 1943."

The linked web page tells about a misguided attempt by a would-be Thomas Bowdler, Huan Hsu, to "ban" the term Chinaman's chance Among other words and phrases Hsu wants banned are chink in the armor, faggot, gobbledygook, niggardly, and spic-and-span. He claims what he is interested in doing is "not shrinking the language — it's evolving it." No, Mr Hsu, what you want to do is shrink the language. Language evolves on its own; efforts such as yours are hardly necessary for its evolution. I see what you are trying to do (as you foolishly and unnecessarily call attention to outdated words and phrases) as working against the evolutionary change you say you want. What you should do instead is grow some, Huan.

Having fewer words to use to express ourselves rather than more goes against what pseudodictionariers want to do. Most of us try to be sensitive about how we use our ever-expanding vocabularies, but we won't go overboard about being politically correct.

e.g., "Whatever he says, Mike Huckabee has only a Chinaman's chance of getting the Republican nomination for President." "'Chinaman's chance'? That's just the sort of thing I'd expect a cracker like Huckabee to say." "'Cracker'? That's just the sort of. . . ." |

As far as I'm concerned, Huan Hsu doesn't have a Chinaman's chance in his efforts to diminish the English language -- while he says what he's trying to do is not what he's trying to do. The man is better-suited to be a politician than a writer.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

chine - To chat online.

e.g., Let's chine tonight at 7:00.

submitted by Jim

chinematography - Steadicam type of cinematography that looks as if the camera was held under one's chin during shooting, either adding to the ambiance of the film as a whole, or making it appear wholly amateurish in nature.

e.g., Blair Witch Project used good chinematography. | I gotta say, those home videos were somewhat lacking. Too much chinematography in them to suit me.

submitted by Paul

chinese cheese - This was a comical mistake my father made when asking me where to put the tea. He was inbetwixt asking me where I wanted the cheese and Chinese tea and it came out "Chinese Cheese."

e.g., Where do you want me to put the Chinese Cheese? Give me some Chinese Cheese.

submitted by Datura

chinese eyes - No, not slanted eyes. Droopy eyes such as one might have after having smoked a pipe in an opium den. Sleepy-looking eyes.

e.g., Although ReGeana feared her guests might know what she had been doing out back once they say her Chinese eyes, that wasn't enough to keep her from indulging in a poke and toke.

submitted by HD Fowler

ching - The sound a disk makes when hitting the chains in disk golf.

e.g., That was a sweet ching.

submitted by Port

ching - Money, shortened version of Ka-ching, the sound of an older cash register.

e.g., "Why are you out here begging?" "Here's the thing, I need some ching."

submitted by rico

chingalow - Low on money.

e.g., I've been kind of chingalow since I got this new job. Better than it was when I was unemployed, though.

submitted by hilow

chingaso - a little thing that you can't remember the name of right now. Taken from Spanish

e.g., Hand me that little Chingaso over there.

submitted by Gyminee

chinger - To look at someone in a less than pleasant manner, then continue to talk about that person in a nasty fashion.

e.g., Chris has been chingering me all day.

submitted by Black Mage

chinglish - A combo of Chinese and English.

e.g., She was speaking Chinglish, so I was able to catch only about half of what she said. Every other word.

submitted by Eve

chinstache - A small patch of long hair on one's chin, but not a goatee or beard.

e.g., It looks like all of DEFROST have chinstaches; they should shave better.

submitted by Xander Bluesummers

chip - Fine, OK, all right.

e.g., Bert: Can I borrow your car, Ernie? ERnie: That's chip with me.

submitted by Nadia - (www)

chip-head - One who is obsessed with computers.

e.g., He's such a chip-head he could draw you a diagram of the internal cicuit of the Pentium 4 microprocessor.

submitted by Stephen Mize

chip-shop - Half-hearted or inadequate.

e.g., Your CV is completely chip-shop.

submitted by mike stringer - (www)

chipmonks - Religious electronics workers.

e.g., The chipmonks aways closed down the assembly line on the Sabbath, which drove Intel management crazy.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

chipped sheep - This is very much like chipped beef, only it's mutton or lamb. It has its own unique flavor and qualities, appealing to the most discriminating palate, economical when it's cheap chipped sheep, but so far available only on the Moon, where they'll eat just about anything. See you on Luna at the Lunatix Diner. Bring lots of credits and be sure to explore our craters. Our seas may be dry but our teas are quite wet!

e.g., On our recent trip to Luna's famous Sea Side Spa we had the good fortune to try their local dish, chipped sheep a la lune. We arranged to have cheap chipped sheep shipped to our home in Terra's Eighth Quadrant by express rocket before we left Luna.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

chippermonky - Hi, I'm Dr. Evil. Due to the lack of 3's we are now changing 3 to chippermonky, so wherever you used to say 3, You will now say "chippermonky" instead.

e.g., 1, 2, chippermonky, 4, 5. I have chippermonky new ideas.

submitted by Chippermonky

chippie - A malicious teenybopper. The chippie lifestyle is exemplified in Seventeen and in television shows directed at the 13 to 18 age bracket. These girls are loud, especially enthusiastic, but insecure. They are generally not very interesting to talk to as their passions range only from boys to shopping.

e.g., In the girl's restroom, the chippies were fixing their makeup and gossiping about the new boy they all thought was gorgeous. Ugh.

submitted by Meredith - (www)

chipple - A very small chip.

e.g., Bob. The chippy filled this bag with chipples.

submitted by Guttius

chippy - Chiefly British expression used to describe the upper classes, particularly their accents.

e.g., He's got a Saville Row suit, a Hermes tie, and a chippy accent. My bet is he's very rich.

submitted by Stephen Mize

chirophany - The signalling of disdain by the showing of finger signals -- one digit in the US, two in the UK.

e.g., Motorists are among the most skilled practitioners of chirophany and, indeed, possess a complex vocabulary based entirely upon this form of communication.

submitted by April 23rd

chiropract - A back formation (get it?) from chiropractor. To manipulate, as by a chiropractor. | To massage.

e.g., Maybe you need to be chiropracted to relieve the pain in your back. | Chiropract my neck, sweetheart.

submitted by HD Fowler

chirp - The sound tyres make when a fast gearchange is made in a manual car or an automatic car equipped with a shift kit. Chirpy, chirping.

e.g., John was hammering the Falcon GT up the road, chirping the tyres on every single gearchange.

submitted by George

chirpacious - Overly cheerful.

e.g., She was so chirpacious it got on my nerves.

submitted by David Richardson

chirpoof - The sound made by a small exploding bird.

e.g., As she sang to it, Cheryl was astonished to see the small robin look back at her and disappear with a chirpoof.

submitted by Misako Kairo - (www)

chirt - Flirting while chatting online.

e.g., Honey, are you chirting again? Get out of that chatroom and pay attention to me.

submitted by Steve Jasper

chisausa? - Expression used by UK kebab vendors, usually of Turkish nationality. Compression of "Chili sauce, salad?"

e.g., "Large doner please, my good man." "Chisausa?"

submitted by Adam Leslie

chitlins - Southern urbonics for "children."

e.g., Git thim chitlins in tha house. It's suppatime.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

chitlins - Food prepared from intestines, usually hog intestines ("chitterlings," in full).

e.g., Contrary to what another submitter said, "chitlins" is NOT Southern urbonics for "children" as in his example: "Git thim chitlins in tha house. It's suppatime." Much as I hate to dispute a submitter, that word is "chilluns," as submitted with "skonan" by Jim Barclay. One shouldn't mess with REAL words in the PD. {ED. The policy of the pd is to allow submitters to mess with real words if they so choose. The editors do so themselves. In some cases, we'll allow submitters to mess with each other.}

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

chive - Something stuck between your teeth

e.g., Do you have a toothpick? I think I have a chive.

submitted by Mrs. Jack Black

chive free - Response to "chive scan" wherein your date's teeth are indeed free of remaining food particles. Abbreviated as "CF."

e.g., "Do I have anything in my teeth?" "Nope. chive free."

submitted by Laura

chive scan - The practice of examining your date's teeth after a meal to make sure there are no lingering food particles. Can be abbreviated “CS.”

e.g., Can you run a chive scan, make sure I’m clear?

submitted by relay

chivers - It is that feeling that you get, when you get that sudden shiver up your spine combining with the sensation od the chill that lasts longer than a shiver and shorter than being chilled. This is the combination of two words created by the dyslexic mind.

e.g., Ooo (ajusting posture), I just got chivers again.

submitted by LP

chivilrist - Someone who is very chivalrous.

e.g., He was always polite to the ladies like a good chivilrist.

submitted by Josh

chiweenie - A dog that is a cross between a chihuahua and a dachsund.

e.g., Rachel found a chiweenie at the dog shelter.

submitted by K

chizmate - What it sounds like when australians say, "Cheers, mate."

e.g., "I'll pick that up for you." "Chizmate."

submitted by adam sontag - (www)

chizzle-pig - A woodlouse, also known as a cheeselog by some people.

e.g., There's a chizzle-pig on the carpet . Quick, tread on it.

submitted by Alison

chizzy - "Awesome, super, happening." Not original.

e.g., We have several, but we certainly don''t have a surfeit of chizzy submittals.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

chlomostlestangerine - Klom-os-tl-stan-ger-een. The way your nose feels when it's stuffy and really really dry inside. You can do nothing about it. Can also be used to describe a feeling of helplessness or stagnation.

e.g., I can't do anything about that problem ... I feel so chlomostlestangerine. You gotta help me.

submitted by Princess Suzy - (www)

chlorine hair - Hair which turns green due to constant exposure to chlorinated water.

e.g., Tandy is really cute, except in the summer when she gets a case of chlorine hair.

submitted by Paul

chloroimbecile - An oxymoron containing two perfect antonyms.

e.g., Amateur professional wrestling is my favorite spectator sport.

submitted by Will Mengarini - (www)

chlorophilia - 1. An abnormal attraction to plants. Esp. cucumbers, carrots, bana,as etc. 2. Vegetarian, vegan.

e.g., Pardon me, waiter. Is there a vegetarian main that comes with the banquet? My friend suffers from chlorophilia which restricts her from eating meat.

submitted by matt clarke

chlorophobia - An abnormal fear of plants, in particular edible plants such as green vegetables.

e.g., Sorry, I can't eat that. I'll just have steak and chips. I suffer from a rare condition known as chlorophobia.

submitted by matt

cho cho - Synonym for chocolate, but much more fun to say.

e.g., It may be bad for your health, but I love cho cho sundaes.

submitted by Mike Jump

cho's - Nachos.

e.g., Bro's, you want to get some cho's with some extra peno's?

submitted by elliot

choade - Can mean anything as long as it's derogatory or disgusting.

e.g., Your boyfriend's an unrepentant choade. OR I drank too much, I'm gonna choade.

submitted by Trent - (www)

choastie - A toasted cheese sandwich, contraction of "cheese" and "toastie."

e.g., I'm so hungry that I'll have to have a choastie with my soup for lunch.

submitted by Claire

chobeez - 1. The feeling of uncontrollable excitement you get upon meeting someone whose presence in your life or circle of friends proves to be very exciting or revolutionary. Usually characterized by loud nonsense sounds, squealing, and rapid movement of head, arms, or hands.

e.g., With our shared interest in digital music, Pearl and I connected right away. It gave me the chobeez just thinking about how she would be able to help me further my own flagging career.

submitted by Elyse The Conqueror

chobo - Adjective (cho-boh)- Korean in origin. To be very bad at something. A newbie. Someone who is not elite.

e.g., That chobo driver can't stay in his lane.

submitted by Jeff

chochy - Cheesy, greasy guy.

e.g., Chris may well set a new world record for being chochy.

submitted by Nikki

chocky moo - Chocolate milk, taken from an interview with Hugh Grant on _The Actor's Studio_.

e.g., For Christmas, I leave Santa some cookies and a glass of chocky moo.

submitted by Kelley

chocky shorts - Chock full of nuts is a heavenly men's brief. Throw out the fig leaf, home for the big beef, it's chocky shorts.

e.g., Even though they're currently popular, if boxers don't do the trick, chocky shorts will hold everything in place.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

chocolacuted - The result of having consumed excessive amounts of chocolate: chocolate overload. Often characterized by an intense need for water or salty foods.

e.g., The "death by chocolate" sundae was great while I was eating it, but now I feel like I've been chocolacuted.

submitted by Jordana

chocolate - Full of coffee and milk.

e.g., A visit to Starbucks leaves you chocolate.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

chocolate panzer - Any one of a later-model German-made large, boxy sedan (usually a Mercedes), painted chocolate or any other cenfectionary color--butterscotch, creme, etc.

e.g., Check out that Benz. That's one serious chocolate panzer.

submitted by mark

chocolate teapot - Something that is useless for what it is designed.

e.g., I know it looks good, but it doesn't work at all. It's about as useful as a chocolate teapot.

submitted by chuey

chocolate, the - The bomb, awesome, sweet, phat.

e.g., Fitty Cent's new disk is the chocolate. Best he's done in years. I can't wait to download most of it.

submitted by Chrissy Gorman

chocopeanutbutteraholic - A person obsessed with the combination of peanut butter and chocolate, particularly as found in many Reese's® products.

e.g., A long-time chocopeanutbutteraholic, Troy finally succumbed to his lover's demand that he seek professional treatment.

submitted by Ross Pitman

chocospurfulation - Flatulating sound the squeezable chocolate sauce container makes when it's almost empty. Can be used with a variety of condiments: mustospurfulation, ketchospurfulation, etc.

e.g., Sally looked insulted and glared at Mark from across the room while Mike was making sundaes. He said, "Hey, that's not me, it's chocospurfulation."

submitted by Mark-man

chod - Bad, unsatisfactory, worrisome, nasty.

e.g., "Last night I got so drunk my tongue went black and fell off." "That was a bit chod, wasn't it? How did you get it reattached to say that?"

submitted by Mel Harrison

chode - A short, stout person. | A collective noun (as in gaggle of geese) for a group of political extremists whether Left or Right. | Term of venery for a group of liberals, progressives, or other leftists or social justicists. See UrbanDictionary for less savory definitions.

Collective Nouns From: Sahil K. Rapper
To: ojo@ojohaven.com
Sent: Tuesday, October 28, 2008 10:22 PM
Subject: Collective Noun Page - Suggestion  

Among my least favorite "words" is chode. It has been given almost 500 definitions at UrbanDictionary. [You'll find more than 15,000 hits googling the site for it.] I've bothered to look at only the first three or four and the last -- the latter in an effort to find out how many definitions had been submitted. None of the definitions I saw was suitable for a family-oriented site.  

Among my least favorite people are liberals, not just people to the left of center, but people so far left as to be . . . irritating to me. Also among my least favorite people are the religious right or evangelicals who seem to have little to do other than find e-mails to forward. I got one the other day that was so ridiculous I did something I had never done before -- I sent a response to hundreds of people in the e-mail tree to tell them to quit sending idiotic e-mails. I even bought software to search my hard drive to generate the mailing list I used -- I'll probably never use that list again.  

Anyway, here's how to use the collective noun chode: a chode of liberals. On the other hand, if you're a liberal: a chode of conservatives. Here's the deal -- you can pick the group that chode is used to refer to. My preference is that it be used for the extreme Left, but it can also be used for the extreme Right -- either way, for someone who has no tolerance at all for someone in the other part of the political spectrum.  

My objective is to give chode something other than an x-rated definition.  

Regards,  

SKR

e.g., Amy's in love with a chode. | I had planned to vote early, but when I got to the library a huge chode of liberals was already there. Oh, well, it won't matter, anyway. McCain is going to win Idaho by anywhere from 25 to 40%. The best I can say for McCain is that he'll get my vote as the lesser of two weevils if I can't cast my write-in vote for Bozo the Clown. (Yeah, I know Bozo's dead. Long live Bozo.) | The current failing economy should make the climate control chodes very happy. The more factories that get shut down and taken out of operation, the less energy consumed. With lower energy consumption comes lower greenhouse gas emissions. | I wonder when the chodes calling for electric- and hybrid-powered cars will come to the realization that the power to recharge batteries doesn't come from the wall or the energy tree -- it comes from burning fossil fuels in power plants. The plants that don't use fossil fuels use either hydroelectric energy or nuclear energy. Don't the chodes care how many snail darters have to be sacrificed to keep them from eating their shoes for Thanksgiving dinner? | Nothing else perturbs me quite like the hypocritical all-knowing and all-powerful gods chodes Al Gore and Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. They travel by private jet and have carbon footprint dozens of times the size of us mere mortals. Carbon credits, my ass. Assholes.

submitted by Amy | HD Fowler ~ Sahil K. Rapper - (www)

choffee - Coffee and a chat.

e.g., Do you want to meet up for choffee after work?

submitted by Peter Couch

chog - Esp. of traffic: sluggish, densely-packed, slow-moving. Also, "choggy."

e.g., We were going to take the new road but it was choggy with beach traffic.

submitted by hippo

chogret - A close friend.

e.g., Hey, chogret, let's go to the mall tonight.

submitted by Stephanie & Maggie

chogy - Always used in the phrase, "cut a chogy." Means to rapidly leave and head for another location.

e.g., Buddy, we'd best cut a chogy for home, while the gettin' is good.

submitted by Steve McDonald

choice - Awesome

e.g., "Choooiiice"

submitted by big b

choir junkie - Equivalent of band geek for choir class.

e.g., I can't believe what a choir junkie Tina is. She is in the choir room all the time.

submitted by Cassie

choke and puke - Used to refer to diners and small restaraunts.

e.g., Lets stop at a choke and puke for some dinner on the way.

submitted by Camw

choke n' puke - Canadians' nickname for McDonald's.

e.g., "Where do you want to eat tonight?" "Let's go to Choke N' Puke."

submitted by Ginberry

choke the kitty - Scaring someone away from your overbearingness, particularly in a romantic relationship.

e.g., J: I want you to tell me you love me. M: Uh... don't you think you're choking the kitty there?

submitted by Julie

choke yourself - To display your distaste for another's disposition, usually used when you're glad you're not in her shoes.

e.g., A. My boss said I have to work this weekend. B. Just choke yourself.

submitted by Ian - (www)

choke zone - Opposite of comfort zone. Esp. sports, an uncomfortable area of the field to shoot or throw from, a situation where you feel likely to fail.

e.g., I made the birdie from 15 feet inside the choke zone.

submitted by Brian McNeal

chokel - Preferred method of execution when dealing with yokels.

e.g., Step out of your tractor and prepare to be chokeled.

submitted by Isolation Tank

choker - Not something you'd wear around your neck, but a cable or chain that is looped around a log in the forest. A choker-setter, who is usually young and nimble, wraps the choker around a log that has been felled and hooks it to a cable. An engine winds up the cable and drags the log to a loading area. It's a dangerous job and requires constant alertness.

e.g., The choker-setter hooked-up the cable and sprinted for safety, before signaling to have the log hauled to the loading area.

submitted by Steve McDonald

chokle - To inhale a liquid while chuckling at something funny.

e.g., I was trying to drink my soda, but she said something too funny and I chokled.

submitted by Joseph Swartz

chokolatenfreude - The joy that comes from eating chocolate

e.g., One bite of that Godiva chocolate bar gave me considerable chokolatenfreude.

submitted by Lee

cholesteroll - A delicious, buttery, cheesy biscuit.

e.g., Pass the cholesterolls please.

submitted by Betsy Andrews - (www)

chombie - A customer of a retail store that is usually unable to find the commodities he wishes to purchase.

e.g., A clerk conversing with co-worker: "Yesterday, I had to help this chombie find the limes."

submitted by James

chomley - A contraction of "chamomile tea."

e.g., Would you like a cup of chomley?

submitted by SofaMan

chomo - Prison slang for child molester.

e.g., The separated area on the map is the prison’s chomo ward. I suppose they do that because the chomos might be attacked if they weren’t isolated from the general population. Do you have any idea how often allegations of child molesting are falsely brought in divorce cases these days? Some of the prisoners deserve protection.

submitted by chloe

chomolongma - (int.) 1. "Yes!" "All right!" "Mazel Tov!" "We did it!" and the like. 2. First place, the winner, the leader, the superlative (like the biggest city, the deepest place in the ocean, etc.). 3. The commander or boss in any given undertaking or organization. (The word is the local name for Mt. Everest: "Chomolongma" or "Zhumulangma Feng" (the translation is more or less "the Goddess Mother of the World"); see also "Qogir Feng" (which is the name of the second highest mountain in the world).)

e.g., "They just announced the bid results ... We got the project!" "Yes! Chomolongma! Good job, everyone. Now, let's get to work."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

chomp at the bit - To be eager or nervous. Champ at the bit has morphed into chomp at the bit, exspecially in the United States.

e.g., Chomping at the bit, Chester said, "Get the lion out of the cage and I'll give it a try."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

chompers - Exclaimed just before biting into something, with the intent of eating 40-60 percent of it with the initial bite. Especially pertinent to sandwiches or burgers.

e.g., Ah, this is a boss-looking burger, chappy. Well, chompers! (chomp)

submitted by zombie shoemaker

chomps - any type of food

e.g., "I'm hungry. I'm gonna get me some chomps."

submitted by Michelle - (www)

chonda - A distance away.

e.g., I need to go to the store over chonda.

submitted by Josh PRiddy

chongbonger - Fictional character, part samurai, part sumo. Secret weapon is the super joint.

e.g., Chongbonger was devastated when he learned that Lord Zurg, the evil emperor of the galaxy, was his father. He also found that because Zurg enjoyed the odd puff, his super joint was powerless against him.

submitted by Wombo

chongy - Slang for "chewing gum."

e.g., All right, mate, got any chongy?

submitted by Martyn

chonky - Bulbous, or chunky. The word was invented when a New Zealander attempted to say "chunky," and what she said was "chonky."

e.g., Stacey: Have you seen Jaws? Tracey: No, why? Stacey: There is this one part when all these chonky bits of humans were floating in the water.

submitted by Sammmy

choo-choo - Awesome character in the cartoon Top Cat.

e.g., Choo-Choo is part of an entertaining cartoon from Hanna-Barbera.

submitted by lunar shadows

choo-choo shelia - Person who is along for the free ride.

e.g., He’d never have married her if he’d known she was just a choo-choo shelia and always looking for a better ride.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

chooch - A person who does something stupid by making a lame comment or a physical action without thinking first.

e.g., Alyson sure looked like a chooch when she blew that bubble and the gum flew out of her mouth onto her in-laws plate.

submitted by alyson ulsh

choofy - Worthless, trivial, unimportant; noun form is "Choofacabra." (Credited to James Ruggieri and Sandice Alaska.)

e.g., The whole system is completely choofy; it's a complete waste of time. | Chris is a Choofacabra -- he never does any work.

submitted by Scott Adams - (www)

chook - Australian slang for chicken.

e.g., We're having chook for dinner.

submitted by shadowcat

chook - This is a word used by some people of the West Indies. It is often used to describe being pricked by an object such as a pin or a nail.

e.g., Please don't chook me. | The boy chooked me. | I got chooked by the protruding nail.

submitted by hyaciinth

chooka - Someone who doesn't just exaggerate, she over-exaggerates.

e.g., Chris is still a chooka -- he told me he and his buddies knocked out 18 guys. John said, "Chris didn't knock out anyone. The rest of us did. Chris was a spectator, just egging us on."

submitted by Jess

chookies - Chocolate chip cookies.

e.g., I don't like chookies; I prefer oatmeal raisin.

submitted by Chris

choom - 1. Often said in preparation to do something 2. An expression of happiness after receiving an alcoholic beverage. 3. In Scotland, choom can also be used to initiate lovemaking.

e.g., 1. Och, right time to do some work... choom! 2. A lovely pint of whiskey! Choom! 3. Come a little closer and choom me up.

submitted by Scotch Eggs

choom choom - Life personified, according to Mr. Paris of Hinsdale Central.

e.g., Choom choom, Mr. Paris.

submitted by al - (www)

chooooow - Ciao, goodbye. From Eddie Izzard's "Dress to Kill" sketch. Must be said Chooooow. A way in whcih Eddie Izzard Fans often say goodbye.

e.g., "Later, man." "Later." "Chooooow."

submitted by Marcus

chop - An absolute jerk. A person who thinks she is cool and has lots of friends. The truth is, nobody likes her.

e.g., Pam is a chop. Why does she hang out with us when we tell her to go away?

submitted by Bier Fuhrer

chop chop - Pseudo or pidjin Chinese? For hurry, up, quick, fast, speed it u p.

e.g., Chop chop, mama-san, baby is loudly clying and needing milk of human kindness from best breast, please.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

chop chop suey, suey - Quickly prepared finely chopped Chinese vegetables, meat, bean sprouts, house-fried rice, all in a heap, moist, tasty, delicious. Moist roast pork, pig, ham, salt pork, all varieties.

e.g., Mama san dish out food for baby san, he say chop chop suey, suey, he is very hungry and cannot wait.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

choppicer - A member of the law enforcement community. They typically are just one notch better than a meter-maid and can usually be found with a well-waxed moustache and a small man complex.

e.g., Ahhh, crap. Here comes Farley, choppicer extraordinaire. Probably trying to win another award from the Mothers Against Drunk Driving.

submitted by Barnacles - (www)

choprasettic - Beyond good, it's new-age good.

e.g., After his evening meditation, Marty was feeling choprasettic.

submitted by Herb Jones

chopstixers - Euphemism for damn, darn, etc.

e.g., Chopstixers! I screwed it up again.

submitted by Teja - (www)

chopsueycide - Means of ending it all, putting poison in your own food.

e.g., As he was very fond of Chinese food, he decided to check out via .

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

chordgasm - A result of intenxe musical stimulation: goosebumps, raised hairs, and shivers.

e.g., The next to last chord resulted in a chordgasm.

submitted by Keith Eckhardt

chore - Chat room whore.

e.g., "I'm typing naked," said the chore. | "I'd have sex with you, but I hate to do chores."

submitted by nitag - (www)

chore tle - The tuneless little contented under-the-breath sounds one makes while engaged in small tasks of great pleasure.

e.g., As she goes through the input queue, fulfilling her obligations as The Editrix Extraordinaire for pseudodictionary.com, hear Lillith frequently giving out little chore tles. You'd think she was making yummy sounds eating Valentine's Day chocolates unless you looked in on her.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

choregasm - Working extra hard to give your partner an orgasm because you feel guilty if you don't.

e.g., It took me almost half an hour but my girlfriend finally had a choregasm.

submitted by Ben

chorm - half cat and dog

e.g., i bred chorm

submitted by josh

chosty - Overly large, burly, tough.

e.g., That's one chosty steak and kidney pie.

submitted by Tripp

chot - Chilly and hot. For people who love to spice up their food with chili for consumption -- it can be extremely hot to the taste. "It's hot" is not quite the right expression, as hot is also for food or drink that is too steaming, boiling, hot to put in the mouth. At a temperature that's too high for touch and not in any way related to taste. Thus, chot should be the right expression, as it is directly related to the sensation of the hot chili taste to the taste buds and not to the temperature-related sensation.

e.g., There was too much chili with the spaghetti I had in Naples. It was really chot. I had to gush down glass after glass of water.

submitted by Alex Hum

chotels - Tight shorts or pants that are like a cheap hotel--no ballroom.

e.g., Did you see the chotels on Chris? Give it some air!

submitted by sin

choth - Cowboy Hat Over The Heart. Any fake or cheesy emotion elicited wit. oversold feeling or lacking merit.

e.g., The huckster's speech had little substance and was way too CHOTH.

submitted by John Carlock

chotomous - Being an only child.

e.g., Twins are dichotomous.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

chould - Word to use when you can't decide if something should be done or could be done. Shkood.

e.g., We chould clean this up, but it might take three hours.

submitted by Mitch

chout - A shortened version of "Watch out."

e.g., Walking across the room with a hot cup of coffee, Sally nearly trips over the dog, "Chout you silly dog."

submitted by Sharron

chove - A limb which has the same length as girth.

e.g., His chove was like an elephant’s foot.

submitted by Sean Cumming

chowmein-liner - An extreme Chinese food addict.

e.g., "Hortense! You're not ordering Chinese take-out again! Please! You need professional help! What a chowmein-liner you are!"

submitted by Dennis R. Ridley

chre - A 15-month or more old Diet Coke.

e.g., Chre is dangerous, almost poisonous.

submitted by Squackle! - (www)

chreaster - Same as CME Christian, but easier to say. This is a person who only darkens the church doorway on Christmas and Easter.

e.g., The pastor sighed heavily at the sight of the church pews full of Chreasters.

submitted by Claudia

chrikannadanza - A holiday that occurs near the end of the calandar year.

e.g., Christians, Jews, Arabs, and Blacks can all buy gifts for Chrikannadanza.

submitted by phluphie - (www)

chrissify - To become an example or be made an example of. From my own personal observation that the name Chris seems to show up in a lot of the examples. Not that unlike "crucified."

e.g., I was terribly embarrassed when Mr. Graham chrissified me as part of his lecture on avoiding bad behavior.

submitted by Paul

christ-on-a-crutch - An exclamation -- basic disbelief, summoning the image of the Son of God limping towards salvation.

e.g., "Damn, we're out of corn nuts." "Christ-on-a-crutch, how'd that happen?"

submitted by megan m wentworth

christeaster - A particular religious denomination that only has church Christmas and Easter.

e.g., Mark's annual attendance at midnight mass was in keeping with his Christeaster faith.

submitted by nitag - (www)

christian crank - Coffee. The drug of choice in conservative Christian circles; the only drug accepted in some Christian circles.

e.g., All hell broke loose after service Sunday when an undetermined quantity of Christian crank was consumed by parishioners in the church basement. Five were arrested and charged with possession for the purpose of proselytizing; several were taken to the hospital and treated for the jitters.

submitted by jonah

christmas on a stick - Very sweet or cool.

e.g., I'm hoping to get a GameStation 2. That'd really be Christmas on a stick.

submitted by trunks

christmas parkers - Individuals who, during the height of the holiday season, will slowly (and for a prolonged period) drive up and down crowded parking lot aisles, vying to find a space as close to a shopping center as possible. Alternative usage: a driver who follows a shopper as she walks to her car hoping the parking space vacated is close to the doors of a shopping center.

e.g., The parking lot was full of shoppers trundling off carts of presents, as well as Christmas parkers attracted to them like sharks to blood.

submitted by Paul Hoffman

christohannukahmas - When a child has one parent who celebrates Christmas and one who celebrates Hannukah. It is a mix between the two holidays, so the everybody is a winner. (ED. What about Kwanza? Or Kwanzaa?)

e.g., A. Kids, which holiday would you like to celebrate this year? B. Christohannukahmas.

submitted by Phil - (www)

chromaddict - A pathological addiction to all things shiny, silver, and metallic.

e.g., Make sure you wear sunglasses when you go into Jill's house during the day or you'll go blind. She's a chromaddict.

submitted by Saint714

chrome dome - The pate of a baldheaded man.

e.g., Without his toupee, Laars is really a chrome dome. But, you know, I kinda like him better that way.

submitted by Paul

chromium johnson rod - A fictional car part. Presumably what a crafty mechanic might try to sell someone unknowledgable about cars.

e.g., "What your problem is, is that you have a slipping differential going on with your chromium johnson rod, I'm going to need to keep the car here over night so I can order the parts.

submitted by Eric Edwards

chromosytzariocys - Sudden bursts of anger.

e.g., Larry's chromosytzariocys prevents him from joining the best friends club at school.

submitted by Menisha

chronecro - From the greek roots "chrono" and "necro,"an adjective meaning "time-wasting (-killing).

e.g., For most of us, our TVs were the most chronecro devices in our homes until we bought a computer.

submitted by gerre

chronic - Something that won't go away. Usually said before a word of what is being continuously done.

e.g., All day I've had this chronic yawn. I can't stop it.

submitted by Amber

chronic lyricosis - The inability of some people to get the words of a song right even though they have heard them a million times. This inability extends not just to one song but becomes a consistent, annoying occurence.

e.g., Do I have chronic lyricosis or is Madonna speaking Spanish in her song "La Isla Bonita" when she says "Tropical re-ilandries"? (tropical the island breeze.)

submitted by Helen

chronitor - One who watches a clock (as at work or school) in the hope that it will hasten the day.

e.g., From her desolate cubicle, Astrid stared out the window and sighed. If only the vital work of a Friday afternoon chronitor paid better.

submitted by adam thorsell

chronmania - Obsession with counting every second of every day.

e.g., The old man (about 67 years old) became chronmaniac as he came closer and closer to death.

submitted by Megan

chronocentric - A concept that is exclusive to its historical context.

e.g., One must avoid being chronocentric when considering Henry James's view of sexuality.

submitted by Dan Sellers

chronocide - Killing time while waiting for something else to happen, especially in a work situation where you can't be productive because of some external bottleneck.

e.g., I can't get started on my next project until Bob sends me his files, so I'm committing chronocide with Minesweeper for a while.

submitted by Jerry Kindall - (www)

chronocide - chronocide, n. (Gr. khronos, time + Lat. cidum, from caedere, to slay; cf. genocide, homicide, parricide) -- the murder of time, the violent interruption of historical succession and continuity.

e.g., Any revolution is a form of chronocide: the past and present are sacrificed to the future. Any counterrevolution is also a chronocide: the present and the future are sacrificed to the past. | Communism is a chronocide: it destroys the tradition in its leap to the ungrounded future.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

chronocognist - The ability to know what time it is without the use of a clock or any other time-telling device.

e.g., I asked John what time it was and without looking at anything, he said it was two o'clock and he was right. He's a right chronocognist.

submitted by Nate

chronocracy - chronocracy, n. (Greek khronos, time + Greek kratia, power or rule) – rule by the laws of time and by the force of temporality; a form of government based on the recognition of time constraints on any form of power and the necessity for periodic change of leaders and transfer of powers on all levels. Under chronocracy, the social life is determined by the regular replacement of political, scientific, economic, and cultural trends, methods, fashions, and personnel in measured periods of time. Presidents, computers, car models, artistic trends, dress cuts, school textbooks, etc. have to change periodically to maintain their authoritative status as "new."

e.g., America is a chronocracy rather than a democracy, with a rigid system of enforced change on all levels, from political leaders to dress fashions and technological designs.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

chronologically gifted - A mock-PC way of describing someone who is middle-aged or older. Considered complimentary because of "gifted."

e.g., A: Fifty years old today. I feel so old. B: You're not old, you're chronologically gifted.

submitted by Shaduan - (www)

chronomania - chronomania, n. (Greek khronos, time + Greek mania, obsession, madness; cf. megalomania, balletomania) -- obsession with time and speed; inclination to utilize every moment and to submit one's life to a total time control.

e.g., America suffers from chronomania. Faster, faster, faster! Why not stop and look in tranquility at where we stand and into which future we have been rushing headlong. | Chronomania may become dangerous for your mental health. Try to find a different focus of life, apart from schedules and deadlines.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

chronomaniac - chronomaniac, n. (Greek khronos, time + Greek mania, obsession, madness; cf. nymphomaniac) -- a person obsessed with time and speed; one who attempts to live faster and to control time up to the smallest units.

e.g., He is a chronomaniac. He looks at his watch every minute.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

chronopath - chronopath, n. (Gr. khronos, time + Gr. patheia, suffering) -– a person who suffers from chronopathy, a disorder of time sensibility. chronopathic, adj. -- characterized by chronopathy

e.g., Why are you always late? Are you a chronopath? | He has no ill intentions or disrespect when he misses one appointment after another. He is severely chronopathic since his childhood.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

chronopathy - chronopathy, n. (Gr. khronos, time + Gr. patheia, suffering) – a temporality disorder, a deficiency of time sense and inability to manage time, to comply with schedules, etc.

e.g., Chronopathy is the unindentified cause of many social disorders and career failures. | Chronopathy can be compared to blindness or dyslexia. As a severe impairment of the time orientation ability, it should be treated as a psychological condition rather than a moral deficiency.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

chronophage - Something, or more often someone, that unproductively burns up your time.

e.g., Ed. "Uh-oh, here comes Eva. She never stops talking and I've got stuff to do." Ted: "You're right. She's a chronophage."

submitted by ron

chronosome - chronosome, n. (Greek khronos, time + Greek soma, body; cf. chromosome) -– a unit of historical heredity, in contrast with a chromosome as a unit of biological heredity; a mental code of a historical period that is transmitted to next generations through styles, traditions and unconscious influences ("cultural air").

e.g., The chronosomes of the early 20th c. avant-garde have reached the generation of the 1960s and shaped its political views and artistic styles. | Nabokov's novel Invitation to a Beheading bears many of Kafka's chronosomes, even if the author claims to have never read Kafka.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

chronotative - A quantifiable value representative of a point or period of time.

e.g., Your mother gave up on getting a chronotative response when she dropped the issue of how late I can stay over.

submitted by Ross Pitman

chronotaxidor - One who time travels, especially for temporal adventures.

e.g., Doctor Who is a chronotaxidor.

submitted by Keaweʻehu

chrons - Short for "chronics."A state when you you feel bad, tired, sick, annoyed, braindead.

e.g., He was late for work because he had the chrons.

submitted by James Grean

chub - Individual rolls of fat on the belly that become visible when slouching. A noun form of chubby.

e.g., I think I gained some weight. I can see three chubs when I sit down.

submitted by DYSKE - (www)

chub the nub - To really be bad at something.

e.g., "John sure can't play hockey." "Yeah, he really chubs the nub."

submitted by Mark

chub-rub - This is generally only experienced by the overweight and slightly-overweight people. "Chub-rub" is a heat rash in the inner-thigh region caused by the friction and sweat produced by walking or running in the heat. Hurts like a bitch, but that's what you get for having tree-trunks for legs.

e.g., I can't go out to Sweetwaters with my friends tonight because I have a severe case of chub-rub and I can't walk.

submitted by Johnny Kitsilano - (www)

chubbalump - Fat people in a Mazda RX-7.

e.g., Ruth and Sophie are the chubbalump that weighed down my ride Thursday night.

submitted by Joe

chubber - A young child that is slightly overweight, and can make you laugh just by looking at her.

e.g., Jolene was just a little chubber when she was growing up. Now look at her. She's a grown chubber.

submitted by Dan O'Brien

chubbers - The squishy fat bits of excess skin that are soft and nice to squeeze. Usually found on the arms or on the lower back.

e.g., Chloe: Vicki, will you let me bite your chubbers? Vicki: All right, but please be gentle with me.

submitted by Vic

chubbilicious - Someone who is delicious and chubby.

e.g., Jack Black is a chubbilicious sexy beast.

submitted by Rachael

chubbing - Excitedly shoveling food into your mouth due to a combination of hunger and the food's being tasty.

e.g., As Charlotte's eyes light up, she grabs her fork and begins to rapidly eat her pesto pasta. Georgina exclaims, "Wow, she's chubbing!"

submitted by georgina seal

chubble - The dance you do in the changing room when trying to get dressed and you’re still slightly wet.

e.g., I twisted my ankle whilst chubbling in the changing room recently but was spotted by Michael Flatley and now have a small part in Riverdance.

submitted by Frankie - (www)

chublett - A fat person.

e.g., In dire need of physical activity, otherwise known as exercise, Lara Lea has become quite a chublett.

submitted by Lara Lea Williams

chuborka - A romantic, personal magnetism peculiar to portly males.

e.g., Stacey couldn't put a finger on it -- he wasn't her usual type -- but she was irresistibly drawn to Greg's chuborka.

submitted by Jack Sevarg

chuck - To throw something.

e.g., Just chuck the remote control over here, willya?

submitted by Ashe

chuck - Bad, piece of crap.

e.g., Phil's car is a chuck.

submitted by Chrissy Gorman

chuck norris - A real badass.

e.g., Chris thinks he Chuck Norris.

submitted by meshell

chucking a skitz - Not working as it should. Having a tantrum.

e.g., Customer: My computer isn't working. Technician: It's just chucking a skitz.

submitted by Emma

chucklelicious - Very enjoyable.

e.g., The chips were chucklelicious.

submitted by Paul

chucklevision - For laugh out loud funny.

e.g., Jeff: ... And finally the cat jumped out of the bag. Steve: Chucklevision.

submitted by Vicki

chucklish - Funny or humorous.

e.g., You accidentally dyed your hair pink? I find that kind of chucklish.

submitted by Nicky Ubben

chuckoutedly - In the nature of being 86ed, thrown out, or chucked out of some place. Violence is implied.

e.g., Chris was chuckoutedly thrown out of the club for the third weekend in a row. They need to put up a not-wanted poster at the door and keep him from coming in in the first place.

submitted by ceana

chucky - Very small and usually cute.

e.g., The chucky kitten could fit in my palm.

submitted by Riki Gifford-Ferguson

chucky larms - Lucky Charms mixed up, may get a laugh out of someone who hasn't quite awakened.

e.g., Pass the Chucky Larms, please.

submitted by Joey

chud - Miscellaneous unnecessary or unwanted objects. Chaff. | Slang for "chewing gum." | Tony threw a stone at the chud detonating its contents up Jeff's legs. {ED. Aha. Confirms that folks from the UK are more civilized and have more class than US colonials.}

e.g., We went to every booth hoping to get some shirts or toys, but all we got was chud. | All right, mate, got any chud? | A fat cow patty, with crusting and soft explosive interior.

submitted by majick | Martyn | Ricardo Zanre - (www)

chuddy - Being round but not fat. | A Yorkshire (England) word for a piece of chewing gum. |

e.g., Alec is definitely chuddy, not an ounce of fat on him, but he weighs a lot for his height and age. | Got any chuddy? My mouth feels horrid.

submitted by Ellen | Abi

chuff - to smoke, inhale, puff

e.g., "What, are you gonna chuff on that all night?"

submitted by timon

chuffed - Overly excited.

e.g., Adam is really chuffed about meeting the Foo Fighters.

submitted by jhulz - (www)

chuffy - The way I look after consistently failing to shave. Often used metaphorically for things that are dirty, worn, or rough around the edges.

e.g., I had to buy a new jacket because my old one was getting all chuffy.

submitted by James Paige - (www)

chugger - Charity mugger.

© Michael Quinion -- 29 May 2004 Newsletter In current British slang, a chugger is a person who stops you on the street to persuade you to make a regular donation to a charity by direct debit. This method is attractive because the law currently only requires those collecting money in cash to seek a licence. Their numbers have grown so high that the government has announced this week that it is to regulate their activities in a new charities law. The term is a blend of "charity" and "mugger"; it seems to have begun to appear in the press only about a year ago but has now become common.

e.g., Sorry I'm late. I walked and only gave myself fifteen minutes to get here. The streets were virtually teeming with chuggers and I was stopped almost every block.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

chugget - Used to order chicken nuggets whilst in a hurry.

e.g., I'll take 6 chuggets to go.

submitted by matty

chugly - Chunky and ugly.

e.g., Anthony likes steatopygous women, but his current flame is just plain chugly.

submitted by Dan - (www)

chukkabek - To say something wrong, realize that it's wrong, not say anything, and hope that no one else noticed.

e.g., Red: The sun goes around the earth. . . . (Thinks, "Oh, no, that's not right.") Ned: Did you just chukkabek?

submitted by Bek Bennett - (www)

chukumpy - Small dog that has a high-pitched voice; a.k.a. a chihuahua.

e.g., My aunt Ginny has three Chukumpies named Buddy, Joey, and Buster.

submitted by Katie

chullet - A child's mullet.

e.g., Mommy, my chullet is tangled.

submitted by Stephanie & Maggie

chum - very chuwy gum

e.g., i love chum

submitted by josh

chumchick - A female friend.

e.g., Natasha is not my girlfriend, she is solely my chumchick.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

chummer - A sarcastic form of address, much like chum or pal or sport. A way of being familiar with someone you don't know or of being sarcastic or threatening with someone you do know.

e.g., Wouldn't do that if I were you, chummer.

submitted by Kosta

chummery - An accomodation provided by an organization where employees who are bachelors reside.

e.g., Let's go to the chummery to have our dinner.

submitted by Lexicon

chummies - The little specks of unidentifiable things floating in your drink.

e.g., I was going to take a sip from Colin's drink, but it was full of disgusting chummies.

submitted by nichole

chump - 1. A loser. 2. Really dumb. 3. Easily duped.

e.g., Alex is the biggest chump I've ever known, falling for Chris.

submitted by nelson rosales

chumpus - A person makes a complete fool of themselves without knowing it. Pronounced: "chum-puss."

e.g., Look how ugly Chris's car is. He's a champion chumpus.

submitted by KC

chumpy - Slightly overweight.

e.g., You're not fat, Momma. You're just chumpy like me.

submitted by Justin

chun - Used to describe something that is particularly unfair, unjust or cheap.

e.g., That Street Fighter match was so chun--all you did was trip me.

submitted by Jimmo - (www)

chun - A spoken question mark, like hunh? what? eh? hm? do you think so? what do you want? isn't it? etc

e.g., Do be or nod do be, Izzat de quest, chun? Jolly good day today, chun? Chun? What can we do for you today?

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

chunda - Someone who has very low IQ.

e.g., Josh Priddy is a chunda.

submitted by Josh Priddy

chunder - Vomiting.

e.g., You come home after an all night kegger and seven shots of Pepermint Schnaps -- and you just feel like chundering.

submitted by Mel Flores

chunga - Ouch.

e.g., "Chunga," I said when I stubbed my toe.

submitted by Trey 7th English

chungstache - A chungstache is a moustache created when you rest your index finger above your lip for long periods of time without realizing it. (It was made famous by T. Chung of Allston, MA.)

e.g., She had a chungstache going for ten minutes during the conference call.

submitted by aguynamededdy - (www)

chunk - A cute, fat guy. CHubby hUNK. | Fat person, usually seen eating or walking very slowly, sometimes blocking the stairs.

e.g., Whoo, there sure are a lot of chunks here. | I'll catch up with you if I can get around this chunk.

submitted by Marlene | Alaena

chunk - (v.) (1) to destroy or ruin something; (2) to throw off or mess up (a) an itinerary or (b) a program (computer or otherwise); (3) to delete, overwrite, or erase.

e.g., I was looking for that streaming-video Buster Keaton site last night, but--can you believe it?--They'd chunked the General! | We missed the plane in Rabat, and after that, well, it chunked the whole trip. | We'd better get out of here: that's a tanker truck full of insecticide that's on fire over there ... it'll chunk the whole neighborhood.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

chunklove - Unconditional love. Taken from the 80s hit, The Goonies, when Sloth the isolated 8ft "it" declares his love for Chunk, the fat friend everyone made fun of.

e.g., Wow, that's some real chunklove right there.

submitted by yimay - (www)

chunnel - To speak on behalf of a spirit from another country; to channel a dead foreign citizen.

e.g., Tonight I'm going to my aunt's house. She wants to chunnel Che Guevera and she needs a translator.

submitted by Augusta

chunter - To wander around, seemingly aimlessly, but usually with some sort of purpose -- although someone chuntering is easily distracted.

e.g., Tom: Have you seen Harry? Dick: Yeah, he's chuntering around somewhere.

submitted by evie

chup - Short for ketchup

e.g., I'd like some chup with my fries.

submitted by Janelle

chupe - Used to classify a person as a loser, boob, wannabe, or poser.

e.g., Did you see how Chris was riding? A total chupe, he is.

submitted by David - (www)

chupe - The small skin indentation above the lip and below the nose.

e.g., Her very favorite characteristic is her chupe; it is clearly visible and not too shallow.

submitted by jade

chuppa - Another word for puppie.

e.g., Come here chuppa.

submitted by tony sitner - (www)

chuppalope - Cantaloupe we have to cut up for our cat, Chuppa Chuppa, to eat. He loves it.

e.g., Chuppa Chuppa is begging for some chuppalope.

submitted by Zolos

church - The decisive moment, the moment when there is no doubt how the game will end.

e.g., When the Cowboys scored with ten minutes left, it was church.

submitted by Jeff

church key - Another name for a beer-can opener. No longer of much use due to snap-top cans.

e.g., The only thing I do with a church key nowadays, is open cans of tomato sauce.

submitted by Steve McDonald

church serving - A large serving of food, usually in an aluminum tray and usually served at church functions.

e.g., Phil made himself sick after eating half a church serving of potato salad.

submitted by Mila Eighteen - (www)

churchified - Southern urbonics for the range of emotions and actions brought about by going to (especially a Baptist) church. The list includes but, is not limited to, hoity toityness, smellin' yoself, buying new hats, excessive fanning of oneself, holier-than-thou-artedness, excessive admiration for suave and clever orators, gossip regarding others attending the service, and willingness to be fed any line of crap and believe it enough for the sake of being too lazy to investigate the truth of things.

e.g., I get tickled every time the churchified Mrs. Jeffries condescends to me all the way down to the end of her nose with such a well-founded sense of being righteous overmuch.

submitted by steve zihlavsky - (www)

churchkey - A bottle opener.

e.g., Throw me the churchkey.

submitted by Ron A. Zajac

chust - This is what you call the accumulation of cheese on your upper lip from eating too many Cheetos.

e.g., I need a napkin to wipe the chust from my upper lip.

submitted by Laurie Frazier

chut - A slang term for chewing gum, used in Newcastle and Gateshead.

e.g., Got any chut to spare? I'm jonesin' for a chew.

submitted by Joe

chuzzlewort - A person who, while drinking, spills something on his white shirt but doesn't notice until the stain has dried and the shirt is beyond saving.

e.g., Danny's a chuzzlewort. He doesn't have any clean T-shirts left because they all have coffee stains on them.

submitted by Dr. Mordax

chwag - A bastardisation of "chin-wag." From Jersey, C.I.

e.g., Fancy a chawg, Rudy?

submitted by Edward Southall - (www)

chwi - The Welsh form of, and pronounced the same as, cooee: a cheery greeting.

e.g., I started my postcard: Chwi! from Abergynolwyn.

submitted by Colin Taffel

chy - Hawaiian Pidgin English for "try." Can be used anywhere in place of the word "try."

e.g., Leanne: Becky, Mr. Olizarski's on line one about the Grayson account. Becky: Tell him chy wait while I access the file, yeah?

submitted by Paul

chyorny monakh - (Rhymes with she-OR-he go-LOCK; also pronounced "CHORneemonak"; n.) A quasi-supernatural character (actually the result of a hallucination, a delusion, or an impersonation (or whatever)) introduced into an otherwise realistic story as an expository mechanism or plot element necessary to the theme of the story. [From Anton Chekhov's short story, "Chyorny Monakh" (in the original Russian "Чёрный монах," which means "Black Monk"), in which the main character, Andrey Kovrin, hallucinates a black-robed monk who leads him to believe himself chosen by God for his genius.]

e.g., In some ways, Rappaccini's daughter (from Nathanael Hawthorne's story of the same name), is a Chyorny Monakh, as the science explaining her is fairly impossible and her role is an almost archetypal one, much like the birthmark in his other story, "the Birthmark." | The imaginary people in "A Beautiful Mind"---hallucinated by John Forbes Nash, Jr.---are all Chyorny Monakhs (properly, in Russian, it would pluralize as "Monakhi") (even though Nash actually heard voices; he didn't see hallucinations). I suppose you could call Chyorny Monakhs "Benedictines," since the Order of St. Benedict uses a black habit, like that of Chekhov's monk. But, then again, Chekhov's monk would have to be of an order extant in the Russian Orthodox Church: The analavos worn by the monks of the Great Schema (the highest order). So maybe we should call them "schemas" or, more properly "schemata" (σχήματα, the actual Greek plural).

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

chyper - A person who chats and types. Chat + typer=chyper.

e.g., Mary spent most of the morning chyping with Dave.

submitted by Stephen Fancey

chyron - From Oxford Dictionaries: noun US trademark: an electronically generated caption superimposed on a television or cinema screen. Origin: 1970s: from Chyron Corporation, its manufacturer. | Wiktionary definition found at Wordnik: n. Graphics or words at the bottom of a TV screen usually unrelated to the current viewing content.

e.g., From the ultra-rightwing and clearly prejudiced against the President NewsHound: "The chyron asked 'Who's Your Daddy?' Chris Rock: 'The President Is Our Boss and Dad.'"

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

ci - Confidential informant.

e.g., Apparently the prosecution has a CI they haven't disclosed to the defense.

submitted by HD Fowler

ciaos - Chaos, misspelled or mistyped.

e.g., "This isn't a democracy, it's a private site. Banning should not be determined by the masses. That would result in ciaos. It also wouldn't put us off the hook because in reality it would still be our call."

submitted by Miss Speller for tw19kilo

cicada - An Islamic-terror subgroup, consisting of terminally-ill terrorists.

e.g., When you have a particularly difficult terrorist mission, forget Al-Qaeda. They're nothing compared to the fearsome members of Cicada.

submitted by Joe Kreiter - (www)

cidiot - A rich person from a city who is very ignorant and rude.

e.g., I knew the guy was a cidiot when he cut me off on my bike with his Mercedes.

submitted by Bryan Gales

ciglagmite - The black ashen crust that sticks to the bottom of your ashtray when you dump it out.

e.g., Keri put the ashtrays in the dishwasher in order to wash out the remaining ciglagmites.

submitted by Keri Nixon

cilvilison - Your average Joe: a normal, living person.

e.g., All those civilisons down there in the city? They don't have a clue, do they?

submitted by Jamie

cinder - To disintegrate or burn up into ashes. Often used in conjunction with "up."

e.g., I shot him with a charged-up Plasma Beam shot, and he cindered.

submitted by BigAssFries

cinderblock - The business card kind of information at the bottom of an e-mail.

e.g., E-mails frequently include a cinderblock with detailed contact information.

submitted by susanna

cinderella feminist - Cosmetic feminist. Feminism used as an accessory, when it's convenient or useful and put aside when it's not.

e.g., At midnight (or any other time it suits her), a Cinderella Feminist can suddenly play submissive as a tool to manipulate the men in her life.

submitted by Refuel Mizrahi - (www)

cinemate - Well-versed or knowledgable about movies, a movie fanatic.

e.g., He came off as this really cinemate guy... until he told me his favorite movie was Men In Black II.

submitted by josh rocket martinez - (www)

cinemuck - The sticky substance found on the floor of a movie theater.

e.g., The cinemuck in the Union Square Theater is so bad my shoe came off twice on my way to the bathroom.

submitted by Nick

cineped - Physical contact with the foot of the person seated behind you in the theater.

e.g., I'd have slept through that boring movie, but a bad case of cineped woke me when the tall man behind me sandwiched my head between his smelly feet.

submitted by Fran Day

cinewobble - The awkward, almost drunken-like look-ma-I-just-learned-to-walk motion of someone walking up the slope, exiting the theater, after watching a movie in the dark.

e.g., 1. My cinewobble surely did not impress the ladies as I left the movie. 2. Barney met Betty for the first time, as he cinewobbled into her at Bedrock Theatre.

submitted by Donald Matthews - (www)

cioed - To disrupt a project. Project disruption caused by Chief Information Officer or other high-level management when they attempt to prove their (outdated) technical skills.

e.g., Tried to build a dimensional database but it got CIOed. Now its all flat-files.

submitted by 3zero

cipher - Knowledge.

e.g., After school was over I gained a lot of cipher.

submitted by Jerome Greco - (www)

circine - ('sir-seen; adj.) of or pertaining to anyone or anything that makes pigs out of people: greed, lust, power, whatever. [from Circe, the sorceress in homer's odyssey, who turned Odysseus' men into pigs.]

e.g., The power of speed turns drivers into swine. Highways are positively circine that way.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

circle take the square - The phrase comes from Hollywood Squares. I use it when I agree or disagree with my friends.

e.g., Caitlin: You know, Chris's ass is so fine. Sara: Oh, I disagree. He's fat and dumpy -- not to mention being bald with a ponytail. Circle take the square.

submitted by Sara B

circle the wagons - Take a defensive posture. | Hide your head in the sand and ignore what's going on around you. (Do ostriches really do that?)

e.g., "Oh, now, surely no obama administration official actually called Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu a chickenshit." "I agree, Hillary, it's just another vast right-wing conspiracy. Funded, no doubt, by Richard Mellon Scaife." "Ummm, Scaife's dead." "Oy ... by the evil Koch Brothers then."

submitted by HD Fowler

circleful - Describing or pertaining to any action, object, or spiritual crisis relating to circles.

e.g., Your karate routine needs to be more circleful.

submitted by Alex

circlekaydians - Vagrants who assemble outside of Circle K convenience stores

e.g., At two o'clock a.m., you will be barraged by Circlekaydians asking for your loose change.

submitted by Wild Jill - (www)

circlemouth - An individual who becomes overly talkative when drunk; term is used, however, for a much deeper defect of character with symptoms of antisocial behavior and a tendency to blame others for things they didn't do. The term is to be used as a proper monicker as well as a generic.

e.g., Ed: Jim told me he didn't want to go to breakfast with us. But when we got back from Shoney's he asked us why we didn't take him to breakfast!. Ned: Ah, fergit it. That's just circlemouth. Ted: He's a circlemouth all right.

submitted by Ronnie Donn

circlesize - To be excluded from membership because the group, the circle, is already filled up, complete, too big.

e.g., They said I was circlesized cuz the men's group was already too big.

submitted by P I E - (www)

circling the drain - Preparing to die.

e.g., He's on life support -- circling the drain, but he doesn't know it.

submitted by jc3

circu-late - The circus is late. Used when the circus doesn't arrive, and the show doesn't go on as scheduled.

e.g., I'm sorry, sir. The Greatest Show on Earth was delayed in Philadelphia. Other than refunding your tickets, there's little I can do. Circulate.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

circular predation - The destructive process whereby a society survives by everybody preying on each other. This includes unfair taxation, stealing, price gouging, lawsuits, insurance fraud, selective prosecution, divorce, shoplifting, and all other means of ripping off another.

e.g., The circular predation has gotten off balance, and many can no longer survive unless they steal more or faster, which will then lead to a faster and faster cycle of predation, continued moral decline, and an eventual societal crash.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

circumambagious - "Circumambagious, a. -– Employing a roundabout or indirect manner of speech. Not as effective, perhaps, on the whole, as an aid to obfuscation, as the sesquipedalianism fostered by this book, always assuming, if you will forgive a somewhat Jamesian digression (Henry, that is to say, in contradistinction to P.D.), that obfuscation is in fact the objective, and having in mind also that, setting aside the relative merits of the two different approaches toward that end, vis-a-vis each other, it can hardly be doubted that the employment of both together, as distinct from one or the other, must have a still greater obfuscatory, or perhaps more precisely, obscurantist, impact, a point well evidenced by the fact that this particular instance of circumambagiousness has, as I believe you will discover, successfully diverted your attention from the fact that nowhere in this admittedly now somewhat overlong sentence is there, despite its superabundance of subsidiary clauses, a principal subject or verb."

e.g., While it comes naturally to some, writing circumambagiously can be extremely difficult for others.

submitted by [Peter John Bowler]

circumnaviloquacious - A politician's delivery of a lengthy campaign speech that is mapped out to circle 360 degrees around the point, creating a sense of covering great ground but without applying any traction with concrete facts.

e.g., In the debates, U.S. voters expected to hear specific, meaningful details of the presidential candidates' views on important topics -- instead, each speaker was adroitly circumnaviloquacious.

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

circumscissors - Implement used like normal scissors to perform a circumcision.

e.g., When the Mohel found he had forgotten his knife, he used circumscissors.

submitted by James Cavens

circumsliced - With all the crust cut off.

e.g., I never have liked crust on bread. I know this bakery where I can buy my bread circumsliced.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

circumstantial intelligence - Intellect coming by the wayside, and having nothing at all to do with intentionality.

e.g., Saving money by being a commuter wasn't a smart decision on my part. It was a case of circumstantial intelligence.

submitted by ricecricket

circumvegetate - To go completely around the house in a vegetative state; to go around the house only in an imaginary way such that one is merely daydreaming of the act instead of actually doing it.

e.g., Over the past two weeks, Mark has circumvegetated his home several times a day, making quite a mess in the process.

submitted by mujolo - (www)

circus sex - Unprotected sex, working without a safety net. Unusual sex.

e.g., John was having circus sex with the midget.

submitted by Tristan

cisanserine - Of or pertaining to someone or something on the nearer side of a goose or geese. Opposite: transanserine.

e.g., Luckily, there was a cisanserine path for us to take and so a potentially vicious goose mauling was avoided. We all know how aggro they can be.

submitted by Tama Boyle

cisco adlers - That certain part of the male anatomy, specifically in such case where either genetics, time, or abuse has caused a freakish distortion of the area, typically causing nightmares in others.

e.g., That guy has Cisco Adlers. He's not coming anywhere near my Britney Spears.

submitted by Breezy

cish cash - Payback or revenge.

e.g., Laura wanted cish cash from Jess for a previous grievance.

submitted by Iam Milk

cite, sight, site - Brian's Common Errors in English: "You cite the author in an endnote; you visit a Web site or the site of the crime, and you sight your beloved running toward you in slow motion on the beach (a sight for sore eyes!)."

e.g., Brian cited a case where the officer at the site sighted the perpetraitor perpetrator fleeing the seen scene.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

citidiots - Rich New York City idiots that descend upon the Hamptons in the summers. More generally, idiots from cities.

e.g., The citidiot in the Mercedes was parked in the handicapped spot at the supermarket.

submitted by Tom A - (www)

citiots - People from large metropolitan areas (such as New York City) who venture into the woods, or rural areas, and behave stupidly.

e.g., The last people to use this campsite were citiots. They didn't replace any of the firewood.

submitted by JackJM - (www)

citiots - People who live and work in cities but, drive to the country and behave and drive like idiots. (ED. City bumpkins, more or less.)

e.g., As we approached the stopped car in the middle of the road, standing and staring at our two loose hunting dogs were a couple of citiots.

submitted by Linda Lavender - (www)

citroenitis - The condition of perception alluded to in the ancient saying, "To the foot that is shod, the whole world is leather." From the experience that when you drive an unusual car you've never even heard of before, you start seeing them "everywhere."

e.g., It was clearly a case of citroenitis. I was a brunette man until I started dating Vanessa the Undressa. Now all I can see out there is blonde, blonde, blonde.

submitted by Pip Wilson - (www)

city - Implies an abundance of something in a given place.

e.g., After I had been gone for a month, my house was dust city.

submitted by ditnis

city juice - Water from the tap.

e.g., "Could I get a glass of city juice?" asked the man of the waitress.

submitted by Elvina

city slicker - Somone who is from the city and is afaid of good hard work or "getting their hands dirty."

e.g., You won't pick up that snake? You're just a city slicker.

submitted by Connor

citydrop - To casually mention exotic cities you have visited, in an attempt to appear superior.

e.g., Don't bother asking John about the international conference. He's just citydropping again.

submitted by Nigel

ciupacabra - Mythologic.

e.g., Chris is ciupacabra. You know, one of those who's a legend in his own mind.

submitted by andrei

civication - The art of promoting civic learning and civil responsibility. Date: 21st century

e.g., Civication is good for the economy.

submitted by Ken Hurley - (www)

civil crime - A criminal act conducted by a perpetrator who will not be prosecuted in the United States criminal courts due to her wealth and power. | An action that constitutes an offense punishable by law which could be criminally prosecuted by a state's attorney, but because the perpetrator is wealthy, powerful or a corporation, the state's attorney office will not prosecute, leaving only a lawsuit in the United States civil court system as remedy for the victim of the crime. | In civil court the crime of fraud becomes unjust enrichment, the crime of forgery becomes robo signing, and the crime of theft becomes conversion or breach of contract -- severely diminishing both the penalties and stigmas associated with the crime. 4 : In civil court the criminal can settle without admission of wrongdoing and does not risk prison. The costs of the lawsuit do not outweigh the profit of the crime, so crime is rewarded, encouraged and nurtured. 5 : An improvised term to explain why Wall Street crime is not prosecuted.

e.g., The state attorneys general and feds' national settlement with mortgage servicers treated fraud as civil crime.

submitted by Justice United - (www)

civilary - 1. The unorganized social institution in which civilians work or live; as distinguished from the military. 2. The place outside of the military.

e.g., John got conscripted and he's no longer in the civilary, so he won't be able to make the wedding.

submitted by Sammers

civillain - Villainous "civilians," such as armed terrorists passing themselves off as unarmed civilians, the sort of behavior that results in civilian casualties during war.

e.g., If we could rid Iraq of the civillains, we would have many fewer innocent Iraqi casualties.

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

civilservice - To get even with someone by sincerely agreeing to fulfill her request, and then taking no action whatsoever.

e.g., Chris came back and theatened to call my supervisor, so I civilserviced him.

submitted by Bob Hill

cixtex - To act strange or different in the public.

e.g., The company president looked very cixtex when he put on a bunny costume for the speech.

submitted by John Hangar

clackett - The little ball inside a can of spray paint, so-called because of the noise it makes when you shake the can.

e.g., I was doin' a tag, and this cop heard the clackett. I was so busted!

submitted by mark

clacky - Classy and tacky at the same time.

e.g., I sent her a thank you note for finding me a place to stay -- on borrowed stationery. Do you think that was clacky of me? | I think a clacky party would be fun. It should take the pressure off men who haven't been around a lot of high-toned women in a social setting before and are afraid of committing faux pas. (Isn't faux pas the plural of faux pas? . . . Confirmed.) | Would a clacky party be age-appropriate for people over 50 or might one work better if all the guests were, say, 30 to 50?

submitted by HD Fowler

clafirication - A combination of clarity and fir trees. To clarify any issue dealing with fir trees.

e.g., Could we have clafirication on the delivery date of the trees please?

submitted by jacq

clag - Drymouth after a big night of drunkeness. From the child's glue.

e.g., Hangover? I'm all clag.

submitted by bob

claim - To claim someone is to beat the hell outta them; usually said in a very bad Cork (Ireland) accent.

e.g., If you don't shut up I'm gonna claim ya!

submitted by nicky

clairannoyance - The psychic ability to sense when something or someone is about to annoy you.

e.g., I started to get some clairannoyance vibes, and the next thing I knew, my mother-in-law was ringing my doorbell.

submitted by Karen Littleton - (www)

clairvoidance - Combination of clairvoyant and avoidance: knowing, suspecting, or sensing that in the future you need to avoid someone specifically. May or may not include a stealth ability to be successful. Most often, just dumb luck.

e.g., After the rumors had cycled back to him, he avoided her. Thanking his clairvoidant ability, he returned home without a social incident.

submitted by Bruce James

clam slam - Aggressive fighting move. The assailant raises one arm above his own head, places the other along his leg, and then brings them together in a rapid motion on another's body in order to cause injury; the arms make a motion similar to that of a clam.

e.g., I was really kicking john's behind until he clam slammed me right in the face.

submitted by slam-p

clamdestin - Concerning the secret doings of mollusks on N. Florida beaches.

e.g., Q. Hey, why is that oyster wearing a t-shirt that says "Gitmo Class of '09"? A. I dunno. Must be something clamdestin.

submitted by wogerdodger

clammers - Hands or feet that are constantly sweaty or damp.

e.g., Eeeewww, Chris! Get your clammers off me.

submitted by treena

clan destine - Scotland's C.I.A.

e.g., If ever you are approached by a man wearing a kilt tartan with spider web and criss-cross patterns, you know you are about to be involved in the murky, underground world of clan Destine.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

clanbury - To inter with all the honors and pomp and circumstance appropriate for an honorable clansman, with pipes and kilts and highland dancing.

e.g., It was a familiar but nevertheless moving tribute when our clansman O'Bumber was clanburied in the cemetery amidst the shamrocks and heather that thrived there forever

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

clandestiny - A secret or hidden future or fate. "Clandestine" plus "destiny."

e.g., Before his death, Bob could never have imagined the clandestiny of his brain.

submitted by Zeeterman - (www)

clanger - Australian. Mouth. Speech.

e.g., I don't wanna hear that sorta talk. Shut ya clanger.

submitted by Wordslinger

clanger - British slang: blunder, faux pas. Australian slang: mouth, speech. I think the word can be used to have a more general meaning, something Wally might say to the Beaver: "Beaver, that just sounded wrong. It was a clanger. You wanna try again?"

e.g., Japanese Prime Minister Taro Aso, known for having the fastest mouth in the Far East, recently made what The TimesOnline described as "probably the most spectacular gaffe of a political career strewn with increasingly baffling clangers": Mr. Aso, 68 himself, referred to Japanese geezers as "hobbling malingerers."

Japanese Prime Minister Taro Aso condemns ‘hobbling malingerers’: Others believe that the comments were entirely predictable, given Mr Aso’s previous form. His attack on old people for their lack of exercise and for “always tottering off to the doctor” was blurted out during a ministerial meeting on the economic crisis and marks probably the most spectacular gaffe of a political career strewn with increasingly baffling clangers.

Doctors, he said recently, tended to lack common sense; Japan, he declared on another occasion, should make itself attractive to “rich Jews.” He was once made to apologise for a joke about people suffering from Alzheimer’s, and quipped to victims of a flood that it was lucky for everyone that the city nearby had not been hit.

In the run-up to his party leadership election in September, Mr Aso admitted that he had been advised to bite his tongue whenever he was gripped by the urge to blurt. Mr Aso briefly apologised yesterday, telling reporters he was sorry if his comments “offended people who are suffering illnesses”.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

clankie - Word used to describe an engineer. Due to the noise created when working.

e.g., Tell the duty clankie that the ballast pump is leaking.

submitted by martin willman

clap-bop - Types of music, usually retro involving random clapping or snapping.

e.g., I love her clap-bop albums, she's the coolest.

submitted by PandaFetus

clapper - Person who claps whilst dancing, either sporadically or in time to some imaginary beat-- usually accompanied by off-kilter, incredibly uncoordinated dance moves.

e.g., I can't take my date to clubs because she's a clapper.

submitted by ilk

clapter - Laughing and clapping at the same time.

e.g., Dick Shawn was so funny at the Roosevelt Hotel Sunday evening, all you could hear was clapter.

submitted by Lucinda

clarinet - A fishing device using classical or jazz music.

e.g., He resorted to using his clarinet after the castanets drove away all the fish.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

clarisma - Having the ability to clarify; expand meaning; to make clear, less puzzling.

e.g., John has clarisma in deciphering the federal regulations.

submitted by Chaz Marbles

clark kent-ing - The practice of using a tame online identity in the presence of friends in order to hide the real internet freak you are.

e.g., Most people don't know about my Usenet antics because I am Clark Kent-ing with my main e-mail address.

submitted by Xkot - (www)

clark rule, the - "This was what U.S. Ambassador Richard Holbrooke's team seeking peace in Yugoslavia tried to avoid by instituting the 'Clark Rule': whenever the general is found talking alone to a Serb, Croat or Muslim, make sure an American civilian official rushes to his side. It produced some comic opera dashes by diplomats."

e.g., Now that retired General Wesley Clark has announced his candidacy for the Democratic nomination for President we can expect his minions to introduce some update of the Clark Rule -- probably when he reverses his position on a campaign issue twice within a day.

submitted by [Robert Novak] - (www)

claro - "Clearly" or "of course." A shortened version of the Spanish "claro, que si" meaning "of course."

e.g., Mom: Did you finish your homework? Son: Claro.

submitted by Adam Dachis - (www)

clashion - Items of clothing or accessories that should not be worn together.

e.g., Leg warmers worn with white dinner gloves are serious clashion.

submitted by James

clasp shakers - The handtouch that is speech without words.

e.g., They always gotta clasp shakers.

submitted by beeba

class 6 store - Military term for an on-base liquor store.

e.g., Can you stop by the class 6 store on the way to the get-together?

submitted by HD Fowler

classhole - Someone with a public image of scruples and social refinement, but who mistreats family members, co-workers, or other associates.

e.g., The captain seemed like a fine upstanding citizen, but his arrest for beating his wife exposed him as a real classhole.

submitted by Dr. Dan Muldoon

classical con-ditz-ioning - (n., psychology) - A process of behavior-modification, by which the subject learns to behave like a superficially-dumb valley chick, exhibiting no common sense whatsoever.

e.g., How did the Harvard-educated, female investment banker became, like -- Oh, my God! -- a ditzy California Valley Girl? For several years, she was subjected to a non-stop ongoing battery of superficial, materialistic, mind-numbing stimuli – a case of classical con-ditz-ioning.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

claude - An alternative term for cash, from legendary french painter Claude Monet. Monet = money.

e.g., Think I'm better off staying in tonight, mate. Got no claude.

submitted by beno

clausenthusiast - An avid follower of Father Christmas, one who attends and supports Santa conventions.

e.g., Rudolph, that most loyal clausenthusiast, took great care to polish his nose to a high gloss before setting out to meet Santa.

submitted by Colin Taffel

claustoephobia - The fear of your toes being in enclosed spaces (i.e., closed-toe shoes). {ED. Good timing. I have an entry waiting in the input queue for The Canonical List of Phobias. I'll add this toe it.}

e.g., Brah, I've lived in the islands so long I've got claustoephobia!

submitted by MT Hammer - (www)

claustraphobia - An intense fear of Santa.

e.g., Christmas was a hard time for little Tracy because of her claustraphobia.

submitted by Wells P. Martin - (www)

claustropedic - A syndrome where the sufferer can't wear closed-toed footwear, even when it's not practical. Mostly seen in the evening in winter. Also: claustrotoebic.

e.g., This winter storm is dreadful, but the strappy sandals worn by the women in line prove how claustropedic they are.

submitted by Danielle - (www)

claustrophobisize - To succumb to the effects of claustrophobia.

e.g., She claustrophobisized when the zipper on her sleeping bag got stuck.

submitted by Stephen Bond

claven - A confidently given but doubtful "fact," considering the source. From the Cheers character.

e.g., I knew a claven was coming when he said: "It's a little-known fact that. …"

submitted by Jon K. Hart - (www)

clavichord - An "invisible" muscle in the thigh. From The Catcher in the Rye.

e.g., My clavichord hurts, so don't sit on my lap.

submitted by Jeff

clavicular - Of or pertaining to the clavicle (collar bone), mostly of importance due to it's flowgasmicicity (which see). | Describing the grooviness of anything due to the grooviness of its flowgasmicicity.

e.g., Huh huh … huh huh … dude … huh … that's pretty clavicular dude, huh huh.

submitted by Steve Zihlavsky

claviknuckled - Hitting the top of a hand with an object. Clavi: verb, to nail. Knuckle: a joint of a finger.

e.g., The nuns routinely claviknuckled me with a wooden ruler when I was in grade school. Too bad that's not done more frequently nowadays.

submitted by Rowdy Rhodes - (www)

clawstrophobia - Fear of small rooms with large cats.

e.g., I always seem to get clawstrophobia when I visit my friend Joie's apartment. Her pet ocelot's pacing makes me nervous.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

claytons - The large black sunglasses that are worn over eyeglasses, mainly by senior citizens (also called cataract sunglasses). The name derives from the large shades that Clayton Moore had to wear when he was told he could not continue wearing a Lone Ranger mask in public appearances because the rights to the character and representations of the character were owned by someone else.

e.g., Two women were waiting for the bus, both wearing large black Claytons that covered most of their upper faces.

submitted by Sallylou

claytons - Used in New Zealand and Australia to mean something that is not really what it purports to be. The expression derives from an advertising campaign for a brand of non-alcoholic whisky substitute which used to be on the market here. The advertising slogan: "Claytons, the drink you have when you're not having a drink."

e.g., How can Tom Daschle possibly be anything other than a Claytons? He can't possibly represent the interests of his South Dakota farm-based constituents.

submitted by Jim Higgins - (www)

clean the closet - A phrase used by married couples when referring to the sex act. This allows one to discuss it without the taboo as only the people familiar with the term know what it really means.

e.g., Sorry, Susan, we're unable to come over tonight. Bill and I really need to clean the closet.

submitted by SD

clean version - An album that contained explicit lyrics, edited for family audiences and PG rating.

e.g., There's the PG-rated, clean version counterpart to the R-rated Family Guy Live In Vegas album.

submitted by star651 - (www)

cleanth - Used to describe something that has been meticulously cleaned.

e.g., I was very impressed by the cleanth of your kitchen.

submitted by Trevor - (www)

cleavage season - (n.) spring and summer.

e.g., It's been a long time coming, but cleavage season is finally here.

submitted by Karl Jahn - (www)

cleaver - Clever, but in a "Wouldn't your mother be proud?" kinda way.

e.g., You got all A's on your report? Well, aren't you cleaver?

submitted by Carla Curtsinger

cleaverage - Combination of cleavage and leverage meaning: to exert pressure or cause influence sexually. Usually used in reference to a female who exploits sexual bias of those in power.

e.g., John, after seeing Betty from reception get her fifth pay raise this year, "Ah, yes, the cleaverage is strong in that one."

submitted by Sam

clecticmaniac - Someone who goes wild over his eclectic preferences.

e.g., A clecticmaniac with a lot of money can afford to shower his friends with all the things he likes.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

clem - Refering to any male from the country.

e.g., "Here comes Clem"

submitted by Jay D

clementined - Lost and gone forever, possibly implying "with purposefulness." From "Clementine."

e.g., The only remaining evidence in the recent police case was clementined.

submitted by Stephen Ertischek, MD - (www)

clenchpoo - The substance that builds up in the corners of your eyes while you sleep.

e.g., Did you just wake up? I can tell, because you have some clenchpoo on your eye.

submitted by Ben B - (www)

cleo - An imaginary and unpleasant body part; can be used to describe an unpleasant person.

e.g., Stop being a cleo.

submitted by EP

cleobishaws - (klee-OH-bi-shahzz; n.pl.) The two great secrets of power, as recited by Cleopatra in George Bernard Shaw's play _Caesar & Cleopatra_: (1) "[I]t is no use my liking or disliking; I do what must be done, and have no time to attend to myself. That is not happiness; but it is greatness." And (2) "[I]t is not that I am so clever, but that the others are so stupid."

e.g., "But I don't want to read all these reports. I'm the king! I don't have to do what I don't like." "On the contrary, your Majesty, that is precisely what kings do. How often have I had you recite the cleobishaws? Have I only taught you words your ears ignore even from your own tongue?" "Oh, all right. Give the stupid reports. This will take all night, you know: it isn't going to be much fun." "I know, Majesty: it is not fun, but it is great."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

clep - To exempt with credit a college course by taking a test (also spelled "klep"); etymology might be related to "clepto," meaning "to steal." (ED. It might also be related to College Level Examination Program [CLEP].)

e.g., She clepped all the required courses of English.

submitted by pam

cleptopalia - The condition of stealing from a close pal. An overwhelming urge to take or remove items from a friend's home in playful mirth. These pseudo-stolen items are later returned after the fun has been had.

e.g., Mary's cleptopalia was well known amongst her dearest friends. She always derived much pleasure with her little games of "hide and steal," in the truest form of a cleptopalic.

submitted by Susanne Strickland

cleratil - What time is it?

e.g., Mich: Hey, Ter, cleratil? Ter: Uhh, 5:30.

submitted by moink

clerihew - 1. "The clerihew is a four-line poem with a rhyming scheme of AABB. The first line traditionally is, or ends in, a person's name; the meter is often mangled, if not ignored altogether; and the overall intent of the poem stresses entertainment over instruction, humor over fact." Named after Edmund Clerihew Bentley. 2. "A mystery clerihew is a clerihew whose subject is a writer of or character from mystery fiction."

e.g., Here's an early clerihew:
"Father Brown
Gained wide renown.
Not for prayerbooks or hyminals,
But for collaring criminals. "

submitted by [Mystery Clerihew Site] - (www)

cletting - That socially ubiquitous oral fixation where one predictably clenches one's teeth when addressing an animal that is so dang cute that you could just pop him on the barbecue and stick it in your mouth. "Clench" + "pet" = "cletting."

e.g., Ad agencies are building entire marketing campaigns around strategies for the prevention of enamel loss as precipitated by cletters.

submitted by helene kay

cleveland - Cleavage.

e.g., In that low-cut dress she was wearing, you could see Cleveland.

submitted by chris - (www)

cleverage - Cleavage that is used by a woman as leverage in order to get someone to do something she wants.

e.g., We all wondered how she got that shirt at a discount, then we realized she had used her cleverage.

submitted by Amelia

cleverosity - High degree of cleverness.

e.g., I'm always amazed by his cleverosity. | Odysseus was modest, brave, and showed a potential for cleverosity. (Shannon Cassady)

submitted by Natalie

cli fi - Climate fiction. Michael Quinion has an entry at World Wide Words: Cli-fi.

e.g., To many of us, much of what is called climate science is nothing but cli fi.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

clichate - Cliché hated by the word's user. Invented due to the fact that the word "cliché" is becoming increasingly self-explanatory.

e.g., How could you say that, Sara? It's your least favorite clichate. Why do you persist in using clichates?

submitted by J Ella Smith

clicheguevera - A gauche Che Guevera reference.

e.g., Another clicheguevera, Chris. Grow up.

submitted by Zeromay Zentroclo

click and mortar - A business that combines traditional retail sales and on-line marketing. Etymology: Synthesis of traditional business buildings (made of brick and mortar) with on-line shopping (which rely on mouse clicking). (Taken from and copyrighted by: www.eworkshop.ae-sjtu.net/mosaic/slang/slang.htm.)

e.g., Barnes and Noble is a major click and mortar book seller.

submitted by HD Fowler

click-bait - Clickbait. As used here, "spin" juxtapositions of words intended to make it more likely that surfers will check out the site linked to. Used most often in conjunction with attempts at generating advertising revenue.

e.g., "The click-bait aspects of 'question headlines' is side-show, snake-oil, carnival-barker quality. Be proud, CBS. Your masters are carnies and used-car salesmen!" | Nobody is worse about using click-bait than The Drudge Report.

submitted by [Joan Of Argghh!] - (www)

clickage - Mental synergy. The phenomenon of finding yourself on the same wavelength as another person.

e.g., "She and I aren't going anywhere- I mean, we just haven't achieved any sort of clickage."

submitted by Pete

clickerati - I am a writer here in Ireland. I coined "clickerati" as a collective for the denizens of the PC & IT subcultures over here. Thus far used only in private correspondence.

e.g., Digifreaks, IT heads, and all the swelling host of the clickerati -- may I have my attention, please. Weep no more me laddies and lasses, the clickerati guru has assured your place in the pantheon of history.

submitted by Patrick Tynan - (www)

clickeritis - The addiction to long hours with a mouse in front of a monitor or a remote in front of a TV, along with the muscle and joint pain (especially the clicker arm and hand) associated with it.

e.g., That gal's clickeritis symptoms have moved from her arm and neck all the way into her low back.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

clickhappy - Repeated clicks of the mouse button on a computer that has stopped responding, usually in frustration. Also: responding to computer prompts thoughtlessly, without reading the prompt.

e.g., When installing new software, or navigating a web site, beware of becoming clickhappy and missing out on important information.

submitted by Lowell

clicklur - Remote control.

e.g., Gimme the clicklur. This show's a rerun.

submitted by Thomas W Hellmueller

clicksessive - A person, usually a woman, who enjoys (usually subconsciously) clicking around in high heels while getting ready for work in the morning. Can include men who like to wear expensive dress shoes or cowboy boots with loudly clicking heels.

e.g., I was awakened at 6:30 a.m. by that clicksessive upstairs walking around in heels.

submitted by Scott

clickspiral - Traversing a series of web pages, each of which has one or more links to another (interesting) webpage. Also clickchain, clickmaze, clicktree.

e.g., I went to a Czech site, and somehow got into a clickspiral. I wound up on pseudodictionary.

submitted by Robert DiGrazia

climacteric - A real word, one I thought looked familiar, but which I've never before seen used in the way it's used in the example. From dictionary.com, the sense in which the word is used below: "Physiology -- a period of decrease of reproductive capacity in men and women, culminating, in women, in the menopause." The example also uses the word materteral, "the female equivalent to avuncular, characteristic or typical of an uncle." I can assure you with absolute certainty that I've never seen the virtually unknown word materteral before. No way would I forget its repetition of the syllable -ter.

e.g., Mr. Quinion says, "They don't write stuff like that any more, thank heavens." Interestingly, at least to me, the sentence is considerably easier to follow once you know that it was taken from "[a] review by W Taylor of two books on teaching gymnastic exercises." That's why I've given you this helpful hint before you tackle it.

The Monthly Review, Dec. 1823 A venerable matron and her virgin sister, who had passed the grand climacteric, happening to cast their eyes over the plates of these volumes as they were lying on our table, and seeing the Herculean attitudes of some wrestling, others balancing, some climbing the column of pegs, the rope or the mast, others taking the long leap with the pole, and vaulting over the bar, exclaimed with maternal and materteral anxiety, that the legislature ought to prohibit such dangerous sports; since the unavoidable accidents, to which human life and limb are exposed, are quite sufficient without increasing the number of them by wantonness and temerity.

submitted by HD Fowler

climb a rope - Telling someone to "Go climb a rope!" means for her to buzz off, get lost, or get outta your face. It may also be used to dismiss an idea or suggestion they've proposed. In gym class, as punishment for misbehavior, the coach might tell someone to climb a rope and literally mean exactly that. This may have been the beginning of this expression.

e.g., He asked her if she'd like to grab a bite to eat together after work and she sneered and told him to go climb a rope.

submitted by Steve McDonald

climbing the stick - Driven insane or suicidally crazy. Explanation: There is a certain parasite that dwells in birds' stomachs. All it wants to do is get into other birds. The parasite is present in infected birds'droppings. Guess what snails love to eat. Once consumed by the snail, the parasite, in its effort to get into another bird, takes over the snail's brain and eyes and, like a crazed zombie, forces the snail to climb to the absolute heighest point of the nearest stick, branch, tree, whatever. At which point the snail becomes easy pickings for the next hungry bird. And the cycle continues. . . . (ED. May the gods spare me from motivated parasites.)

e.g., If I have a screaming baby sitting behind me on the plane this time, I'm really going to climb the stick.

submitted by Jay Luker - (www)

clinfo - Shorthand for "clinical information."

e.g., I received the requested clinfo via fax from the doctor's office.

submitted by Richard Kamins

cling cling - As in super Clean!

e.g., " If My mom saw my room so Cling Cling my mom will know its gotta be the puppy chow"

submitted by Charllie

clinge-clanche - An inexplicable wave of human pleasure experienced as a direct result of contact with any form of non-specific pleasure stimuli.

e.g., Don't throw away the postage bubbles, popping them is so clinge-clanche.

submitted by iamarobot

clingon - A driver of another vehicle who increases her speed when you attempt to pass her.

e.g., I had to get it up to 80 in order to pass that clingon back there.

submitted by g. white

clingon - New spelling for the surname of Bill and Hillary, who are clinging to power as long as possible in the Democrat Party. Cling-on. (From a ytpo that seemed to fit.)

e.g., Not that long ago Klingons were the villains. Where should we place Bill and Hillary Clingon?

submitted by Miss Speller

clingy - This is what someone is described as being in a relationship when she's affectionate and enjoys the company of the other person, but these feelings aren't reciprocated. It's similar to the effect when someone unattractive flirts with you (sexual harassment) as opposed to when someone attractive does (charming).

e.g., My boyfriend is getting too clingy. He wants to have dinner with me every night now. The next thing you know he'll want to move in with me. I almost never see my other boyfriend any more.

submitted by George Edward Purdy - (www)

clink - Noun: A clickable link. Hypertext link. Verb: Clicking a hypertext link.

e.g., The page needs a clink.

submitted by Tom Chaudoir

clinky - Tapping two held glasses containing any type of liquid together, thus forcing you and the other party involved in the act to drink the liquids contained in the glasses. A party game.

e.g., You cannot disobey the rules of the clinky; you have to drink that straight sambuca bottle while I drink my beer. OR Your evil sneaky clinkying ways will be the death of me tonight.

submitted by Vengeance

clintoid - Mindless canker-blossomed apologist for Bill (or Hillary) Clinton. Also, liar.

e.g., One long-toothed CBS news reader is a leading media clintoid.

submitted by Rodger Schultz - (www)

clinton - To skirt around an issue, either by saying something filled with innuendo to describe it, or by saying something not pertaining to the issue at all.

e.g., Stop clintoning and get to your point. (See "to daschle.")

submitted by Ryan Johnson - (www)

clinton-fatigue - The weariness that overcomes one after enduring years and years of Bill Clinton's scandals. When you've tired of Clinton's one scandal after the other and you finally just want the man to go away and not be in the news anymore, you're suffering from Clinton-fatigue. Or, when you've tired of listening to Clinton's lame excuses, flimsy lies, and carefully crafted wording that is supposed to skirt the law, at the same time that everyone realizes that he's just lying, you're suffering from Clinton-fatigue.

e.g., It's too bad that Al Gore got tangled up with Bill Clinton. Before that, I really admired and respected Gore and would have voted for him. But not anymore. I've got Clinton-fatigue like everyone else, and want all of those liars out of the White House.

submitted by Ed Reynolds

clintonian - Deceptive, criminal.

e.g., In clintonian fashion, the car dealer charged Widow Brown double the normal dealer prep charge.

submitted by Rodger Schultz - (www)

clintonion - For lies of flabbergasting chutzpah. Lies so big they make you want to cry. | So left wing it brings tears to your eyes.

e.g., If only Al Gore had had some redeeming qualities -- such as being able to tell clintonion lies. His were pathetic fibs in comparison. | Dean's even more clintonion than Clinton -- either one of them.

submitted by HD Fowler

clintonion conviction - Convictions that make you cry. Convictonions.

e.g., Listen to Hillary Robham Clingon scream "Power to the people" and you'll know where her clintonion convictions want to take the country -- right where Che Guevara would have US go.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

clintonistic - Descriptive of a politician who is willing to sacrifice the public interest in order to reach her own political goals.

e.g., Let's vote down these clintonistic politicians, as their performance has been despicable.

submitted by Aaronq - (www)

clintonizer - Womanizer. | Defined as "an office paper shredder" at USA Next, the linked website.

e.g., No, don't go out with that sleazeball. He's a clintonizer. | He should have used a virtual clintonizer on the e-mails from his mistress.

submitted by Carol J. Monical - (www)

cliometry - (klee-O-met-ree, n.) 1. pattern recognition; 2. a form of logical induction allowing us to infer probable upcoming events based upon past experience. [From CLIO, Hesiod's Muse of History, venerated in Ancient Greece + METRIA "measure."]

e.g., 1, 3, 5, 7, ___ (cliometry suggests that "9" go in the blank; of course, we could be wrong, but inductions are probabilities only). | Since the election of Eisenhower in 1953, the American presidency has shifted pretty regularly between Republicans and Democrats -- R, R, D, D, R, R, D, R, R, R, D, D, R, R, D. If this pattern is correct, it suggests, cliometrically, that Obama will serve only one term, like Carter.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

clipnesia - The state of mild confusion that arises when you know that you have copied something to the clipboard and it's quite important but you can't remember what it is.

e.g., "What's up? Why don't you just copy the files?" "I've got clipnesia. Let me dump what I got on the clipboard first--it might be important."

submitted by nigel

clippanic-gyrations - The frenzy a person goes into when receiving a cell phone call and her cell phone is clipped to her belt and she can't get it off. Clippanic-gyrations are best when a person is walking calmly and the mere fact that her cell phone is ringing while clipped to her belt and she can't get it off sends her into a sudden flail as if she were stung by a stun-gun.

e.g., It was really embarrassing when Jim got a call on his cell phone and went into clippanic-gyrations while standing in line at the movie theater.

submitted by jay donaldson - (www)

clipto maniac - A hair stylist who either clips too much of your hair, or gives you a style you don't want.

e.g., I had to change hair stylists. My old one turned into a clipto maniac.

submitted by Paul

clirty - When the clean pile meets the dirty pile of laundry you wind up with a pile of clirty clothes, thus leaving the measure of clean up to the senses.

e.g., "Huney, is that a pile of clean or dirty clothes?" "They're clirty."

submitted by Peter Beckwith

clitizen - A female citizen, whether or not she has been altered by a clitoridectomy.

e.g., More and more third world countries are allowing clitizens who emigrate to affluent foreign countries to retain their birthright citizenships. Do you suppose they have a self-serving reason for allowing that?

submitted by beelzebub - (www)

clizzy, the - The club.

e.g., Jack and I will meet you at the clizzy, same as always.

submitted by andrew rowe

cloan - To loan something out that was borrowed in the first place.

e.g., Arthur cloaned my CD to Debbie. She turned around and asked me if I wanted to borrow it.

submitted by Lester

cloathing - Clothing, perhaps purchased at Abercrombie and Fitch.

e.g., Well, here comes the "in crowd" wearing that loathsome cloathing they cloathe themselves in. I'd certainly be loath to wear it myself.

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

clobcinerate - To clobber, or heavily beat on, and then disintegrate, or crush to pieces.

e.g., The killer robot clobcinerated my favorite doll

submitted by Shakira

clock - To capture the eye of an admirer. Possible origin: cops' radar. | To work or run very fast. From overclock, forcing a computer processor to run faster than its factory settings allow. 1. (v.) to stock up on stimulants, such as coffee or caffeinated products, in order to complete a lengthy task. 2. (adj., "clocked") To be overstimulated or jittery from excess consumption of caffeine. | To notice or see.

e.g., Ryan, I think Brit just clocked you. | 1. I have a huge paper due tomorrow -- I'm going to have to clock my way through it. 2. John's been working on that programming project for two days. He's clocked. | From a review of _Bad Teacher_: "Dumped by a fiance who has clocked her affections lay entirely with his bank balance, she is forced back into the classroom she had just quit to begin her anticipated life of leisure."

submitted by Angel | Preston Mark Stone | HD Fowler - (www)

clock dollars - To earn money.

e.g., My new job allows me to clock dollars.

submitted by Jerome Greco - (www)

clockaholic - Someone who is addicted to watching the time -- generally in the hope that time will pass quickly.

e.g., Watching the clock constantly until it was time to go home, she realized she had become a clockaholic.

submitted by Leisa

clockbastard - Blockbuster. Coined in reference to the franchise's infamous cruelty in its strict late fee policies.

e.g., I refuse to start an account at clockbastard -- they eat their young.

submitted by Dr. Science

clockblock - When a person sleeps between the alarm clock and another person so that said person doesn't turn off alarm to make you oversleep, thus missing work.

e.g., I can't afford to miss work again, so I'll have to clockblock you.

submitted by Natalie

clockstalking - Watching a clock so as to get the absolute last second out of being on the computer.

e.g., Bob's Starcraft strategy was weak. He was clockstalking so he wouldn't be late for work.

submitted by Bob Gandy - (www)

clocksucker - One who drags out a job, either to earn a lot of overtime or to avoid new assignments

e.g., Those clocksuckers in the mail room were here 'til midnight.

submitted by tom johnson

clockulations - Any mathematics involving time.

e.g., The game starts at seven and it's quarter to six now. By my clockulations we have 75 minutes.

submitted by PDR

clodpoll - Archaic term for a stupid person.

e.g., That new guy is a clodpoll.

submitted by Brent

cloe - Used in describing one article of clothing. Singular form of clothing.

e.g., Can you hand me that cloe (referring to a shirt lying on the bed)?

submitted by karenthecute

cloggress - A perceived unit of measurement to gauge activity in any direction. More often nowhere.

e.g., Thanks to your clogress there is no way to make the deadline on the project, so everyone is working late tonight.

submitted by Peter Beckwith

clogs and shawls novel - Novel in which a teenage heroine living in poverty in the first half of the 20th Century (hence her attire) falls in love with a handsome young man from a wealthy background and escapes to a better life . . .but only after suffering a few bits of adversity. Type of book regularly reviewed in The Sunday Post and The Scots Magazine. Derived by Annie Thompson from "sex and shopping" novels as the antithesis of these.

e.g., Have you seen Margaret Dickinson's new book? Classic clogs and shawls.

submitted by Alan Morrison

clomb - Past tense of climb. Instead of climbed. Pronounced clome.

e.g., As I clomb the ladder, I realized I was acrophobic.

submitted by Corey Bonneville

clon - The lines on a note book

e.g., I write on the clons.

submitted by blaze

clone - A group member who pointlessly reiterates a particular group view.

e.g., It's not possible for clones to have original opinions, so they should just stay out of discussions.

submitted by Varrick Nunez

clongde - /CL-ON-JAH/ Someone extremely smart in math, reading, and social studies But is terrible at gym. {ED. Social studies, eh? Is that what was once rightly called history? One presumes this is based on some person's name.}

e.g., Wow, you're so good at math and reading, but you are terrible at gym. You're a clongde -- and I'm not.

submitted by Grace Z

clonkye - Clonkye (pl. clonkyen) 'clonk·ye (prob. onomatopoeic) (actual Brits’ English corrumption q.v. < Du. klontje): sugarlump.

e.g., Alice: “How sweet do ye like yer coffee?” Bob: “O, just five clonkyen.”

submitted by René

clont - The hood on a hooded sweatshirt

e.g., The clont keep my head warm

submitted by Blaze 7th

clonus - A type of muscle spasm.

e.g., As he twitched spasmodically on the floor, I thought to myself, "He's sure having one sweet clonus!"

submitted by Monkhoas

clony - What you get when you clone one of your cronies.

e.g., "Get a clue and help your liberal clonies find some sense, too, if you are serious about staying in power."

submitted by Miss Speller for scoutsout1

clorange - A word that doesn't rhyme with anything else--except orange.

e.g., Orange is a clorange.

submitted by David Kuling

closature - How something closes or ends. The opposite of opening or overture.

e.g., 1. The romance was fizzling but the final closature was way too cold. 2. The vet had to fix the closature of the dog's eye.

submitted by Susan Beyer - (www)

close-talker - Someone who stands too close to you when speaking. From the tv-series "Seinfeld."

e.g., You know Aaron? Yeah, he's that close-talker, right?

submitted by DeNo

closed rag - A newspaper that will not print anything contrary to its own position on any subject.

e.g., Mary submitted letter after letter about local pollution, but the closed rag refused to print any of them. (ED. Maybe she should come out against pollution instead of in favor of it.)

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

closet - This word has progressed from its meaning in the original phrase "coming out of the closet," referring to acknowledging being homosexual. It now refers to anything not immediately obvious or believable.

e.g., David Beckham is closet good at speaking French.

submitted by David Brennan

closet communist - 1. Any communist claiming to be against communism 2. Any person who supports communist values but doesn’t consider herself to be a communist.

e.g., Jo's most likely a closet communist. Although she claims to be against communism, she has the Communist Manifesto in her room.

submitted by Sammers

closet-time - The length of time one hides part of her character from others.

e.g., They didn’t know she was so loose; her closet-time was almost 25 years.

submitted by Adrian R. Lawler

closeted - "Closeted" and "in the closet" are terms that have been in use since the mid-20th century to refer to a person who is hiding her homosexuality.

e.g.,

Ben Domenech, a former Bush administration aide and Republican Senate staffer: A White House spokesman, Ben LaBolt, said he complained to CBS because the column "made false charges." Domenech later added an update to the post: "I have to correct my text here to say that Kagan is apparently still closeted -- odd, because her female partner is rather well known in Harvard circles."

submitted by HD Fowler

clothes porn - Movies or TV shows masquerading as women's drama, lifestyle, or infotainment. Main demographic: viewers envious of the glossy and trendy wardrobes worn by the participants. Can be readily detected by the presence of a changing-clothes montage to upbeat music (see Pretty Woman). Phrase may have originated with science-fiction author Pat Cadigan. See "shopping porn," "food porn," and "gun porn."

e.g., Supposedly the interviewer spent a day with the starlet talking about her latest movie, but actually it was just clothes porn.

submitted by Paul-Michael Agapow - (www)

clothes wringers - Back in the days before the Second World War, simple washing machines had a couple of rollers at the top for wringing out the wet clothes, after which you would hang them outside on clothes lines to dry.

e.g., There were no clothes dryers back then, so you needed the clothes wringers to squeeze out as much water as possible, then when you hung up the clothes on the lines they would dry faster

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

clothestase-splingy - Dry, fuzzy mouth. kloths-tays-plingee

submitted by Princess Suzy - (www)

clothinglessness - The state of nudity, not wearing clothing.

e.g., "Yeah, so I walk into the room and he's there in a state of clothinglessness." "OMG, I've always wanted to see him without a shirt, but not with nothing on."

submitted by cruz_away

clousy - Hybrid of cloudy and lousy.

e.g., The sky is overcast and it’s raining — what a clousy day.

submitted by Aalix

cloverleafing - To drive around the four ramps of a highway interchange until dizzy.

e.g., James decided that cloverleafing after a six-pack and a carton of cigarettes wasn't such a hot idea.

submitted by Chris Surguine

clow - A completely random but completely great happening or event.

e.g., We had the weirdest clow last night.

submitted by Colleen Thompson

clown - To fool, con, or cheat someone. Short for the more wordy phrase "to have made a clown of" . . . which is also long for "to make a clown of."

e.g., Chris clowned the minister into giving him bus fare by convincing her we were distant relatives.

submitted by ditnis

clown-munch - Someone who is stupid in your eyes, or someone who makes you angry.

e.g., The driver behind me is a clown-munch. Always, always the same. Why am I always leading a parade of clown-munches? Don't answer that, clown-munch.

submitted by Scott - (www)

clown-shoes - Unprofessional, appearing home-made, and unsatisfactory. Often used to describe the results of an attempt at repair. From the way a professional clown's shoes look: held together with painted tape, bits of wire, etc.

e.g., The patch job your boyfriend did on your bumper is especially clown-shoes.

submitted by Billy Fisher - (www)

clowndestine - To be privately humorous.

e.g., He seems very solemn, but he's actually carrying on a clowndestine relationship with his pets.

submitted by Peri Craig

clownin - Used to describe someone acting in less than a professional manner. Someone who doesn't take things very seriously. From the word clown.

e.g., Those homies spend too much time clownin.

submitted by Nicholas Larson

club-fed - The federal law enforcement officer's training center at Glynco, Georgia.

e.g., No one carries a badge for Uncle Sam without going through club-fed first.

submitted by Stephen Mize

clubberin - Referring to a fake or staged fight on television or movies, and can also refer to a wrestling match.

e.g., Look at Stone Cold and The Rock clubberin on each other.

submitted by Crazy Larry

cluck - A person who does stupid things at random.

e.g., "Boy! That idiot sure is a cluck!"

submitted by David

cluck salvo - When all the stupid roosters start crowing between 2:am and 4:am simultaneously when no one (or in these post industrial times, almost no one) needs to awaken.

e.g., So, I shot four roosters this morn. There aren't any chickens, and I saw no need in their cluck salvo since I don't arise before 6:45 a.m. anymore.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

cluddups - The sound that heavy footfalls make, when ascending or descending a staircase.

e.g., I always know when Mark's going to visit my flat. I can hear his cluddups as he's coming up the stairs ... he also calls out "Muggers!"

submitted by Paul

cludgy - Clunky+dodgy. A cumbersome, unstable construct usually referring to computers and video gaming.

e.g., After spending hours tweaking settings and numerous restarts, the cludgy game play prompted Jack to return the game.

submitted by Merritt

cludoliptical - The belief that a god can be walking among us and have the name of one of our friends -- even our name.

e.g., I am overly cludoliptical, so I do not believe in Allah.

submitted by Sean Harringtonelli

clue-by-four - When the cluestick just isn't enough, or repeated cluestick smacks have had no result, one must then use something with a bit more heft. (Yes, I know your definition of "cluestick" mentions a 2x4, but most of the folks I know who use the term "cluestick" imagine it as something like Sister Mary Discipline's ruler.)

e.g., He just doesn't get it, does he? Hand me the clue-by-four.

submitted by Pieter Breitner

cluebrick - A helpful hint or assistance desperately needed by a person who is usually not aware she needs one.

e.g., John is clueless about Marsha's birthday. Can somebody throw him a cluebrick?

submitted by alex hood

clueful - Having a clue. Adeptness. Antonym of clueless.

e.g., That was a very clueful way of handling the problem.

submitted by Daniel Abranko

cluefulessness - Someone who possesses the attribute of being considerably clueless, or demonstrates herself to be particularly clueless when expressing herself.

e.g., There's so much cluefulessness in that sentence that I don't know where to begin.

submitted by Lee Haywood - (www)

cluestick - An instrument used to smite stupidity -- usually in the form of a 2X4, but can also be other pieces of wood such as mallets and baseball bats.

e.g., Chris is an idiot. I just wanna whack him with a cluestick -- or, even better, maybe he'll get whacked by some of his criminal associates.

submitted by Dare - (www)

clumbersome - Something that is awkward to move or handle.

e.g., That credensa was clumbersmome to move.

submitted by chris gifuni

clummy - Feeling tired, clumsy, vulnerable, and demotivated--often followed by falling asleep.

e.g., I'm not coming out tonight. I feel too clummy.

submitted by Alex

clums - Clumsy, but as a noun.

e.g., I just dropped the vase on my foot.I am such a clums!

submitted by Lucinda Inganni

clumsyorchid - Used to denote absolute power or control. The word is especially applied to situations that have a clear victor.

e.g., The ability to destroy random people with a supersonic snap of your fingers, or melt people with a sponge is very clumsyorchid.

submitted by an evil squirrel

clunger - Cluster of hangers. ClungerWhat you come up with when you reach into the closet and grab a hanger.

e.g., I only need one hanger for my coat, not that whole clunger.

submitted by Den

clupknick - Describing any item that does not work anymore.

e.g., It's busted, the computer is clupknick.

submitted by Andrew Higgins - (www)

clusterfest - A polite version of the term used to describe a situation where a number of contributors have turned a relatively simple task into a problem nearly impossible to fix. Best used at a festive occasion such as a birthday party, and not at a solemn occassion such as a memorial service.

e.g., The caterers for that non-drinking Jewish couple supplied roast pork and champagne at the reception lunch? That was a clusterfest.

submitted by John Burke - (www)

clutch - A good thing or when something works out.

e.g., "I checked out that resturant last night, it was clutch"

submitted by Peter Spinale

clutch - Collective noun for a group of handbags.

e.g., A group of women dancing around a clutch of handbags? Yes, I saw them. They were in a Conga line headed for the ladies' loo.

submitted by Alison

clutch - Derived from "clutch" handbags. Activities or habits so ridiculously geeky or neat freakish that friends or relatives can no longer handle them.

e.g., Fran: My roommate insists the CD rack be organized alphabetically by "moods." Jan: That's too clutch for me.

submitted by Nichol C.

clutcheon - A general term for small bits of hardware.

e.g., That's a clutchen and that's a clutcheon. Said by a four-year-old pointing at items on a hardware store shelf.

submitted by Rod McKay

cluzak - Funny in a sorta outrageous way. Can be a noun or adjective. Mixture of three words: "classic" (the root word), "Muzak" (the annoying background music, and a cult football player named Matthew Kluzek.

e.g., The political observations of that irreverent comedian we saw the other night were abolutely cluzak.

submitted by Adam Rapoport

clyde - well dressed man about town

e.g., "with my cream turtleneck sweater and navy blue oxford jacket, i am as clyde!"

submitted by tsa

clydesdale scale - Indicates on a scale of 1 to 10, how many Clydesdales would have to be hitched up, to pull you away from a certain woman. Similar to the standard 1 to 10 scale of desirability, only more earthy and of course, it uses only whole numbers.

e.g., Jack: How many Clydesdales for her? Mac: No Clydesdales for her. I wouldn't go near that one on my worst day.

submitted by Steve McDonald

clyptch - A repository of misspelled words. Word comes from a dream -- it's a jot tollity.

e.g., Whaddaya think, is the PseudoDictionary becoming too much of a clyptch?

submitted by Preston Madison - (www)

cme christain - A person who only goes to church on Christmas, Mother's Day, or Easter.

e.g., There are those who claim that Hattie is a CME Christian.

submitted by Hattie

cmos - Chicago Manual of Style. While CMOS meant Complementary Metal-Oxide Semiconductor to most of the people I worked with, it's always meant something else to me.

e.g., I'm waiting for CMOS to answer my question regarding "My favorite fruit is apples" vs. "Apples are my favorite fruit." (I inferred that a teacher posting on an ESL forum essentially considered the first version to be incorrect, since she said it was idiomatic. Her replacement with "Apples are my favourite fruit" didn't suit me. Shouldn't I be able to use fruit in the subject? If I do that, the predicate noun is definitely not apple.) | Thanks to CMOS, I now have an understandable rule for when to use singular verbs and plural verbs with mass nouns.  


 
From CMOS:

5.9 Mass noun followed by a prepositional phrase

Mass nouns are sometimes followed by a prepositional phrase, such as number of plus a plural noun. The article that precedes the mass noun signals whether the mass noun or the number of the noun in the prepositional phrase controls the number of the verb. If a definite article (the) precedes, the mass noun controls, and typically a singular verb is used {the quantity of pizzas ordered this year has increased}. If an indefinite article (a or an) precedes, then the number of the noun in the prepositional phrase controls {a small percentage of the test takers have failed the exam}.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

cmyk - Acronym for Cyan, Magenta, Yellow, and Black (don't ask me why K stands for black). Theoretically, when properly and applied to white paper, these colors can replicate any visible color. Actually, some colors need to be pre-mixed.

e.g., This appears yellow, so we'll reduce its yellow CMYK component.

submitted by James Michalek

cnai - extremely fast version of "can I?"

e.g., "Cnai go now?!"

submitted by Kiaré - (www)

cni dog - Seeing eye dog.

e.g., Earlene's not likely to go very far from her apartment without her CNI dog.

submitted by HD Fowler

co - A gender neutral term that replaces he and she in all its declensions. This word is already in widespread use at a commune in Virginia that practices gender equality.

e.g., When the vegan arrives today for the start of the three-week visitor program, please let co know where co can find some fresh soymilk from our tofu hut. In the spirit of anonymity, let me just say that co dropped co's glasses into the composting toilet chamber and retrieving them was a real bummer.

submitted by Bill Glenn

co ack! ulate - The moment of realization. when one has stepped in some grossly vile substance, that it had compressed and was sticking firmly to your shoe

e.g., Sitting on the sofa in the Harris' living room, and waiting for Pam, the prettiest girl in his college, to come dowm from her room upstairs and accompany him to their Senior Prom, poor Winton was suddenly struck with the sheer horror of the impending ruined evening as, simultaneously, he noticed the clumps of brown staining the beige carpet from the door to the couch, and, as he had crossed his left leg over his right knee, the nauseating smell rose from the dog feces, that co ack! ulated thickly on his left shoe, assaulted his nose, and knotted his stomach, while Pam, a bright smile on her pretty face, descended down the stairs, tragically, and inevitably, towards him.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

co ear ce - An action intended to force an individual to desist from, or comply with, an activity, by the pinching, twisting, or pulling on one of the two fleshy protuberances located on the opposite sides of one's head, and/or grabbing such protuberance, and yelling, loudly, into the hollow space containing one's audio input system.

e.g., Hilda: 'ey, 'arry, 'ow come ya got such 'orrible, ugly ears? Dey stick way out -- da tops are all crinkled, and if ya turned arould real quick, da lobes ud slap yer face!  
Harry: Ya, it's 'cause I was a beasty boy as a kid. Me Pops 'ud try ta co ear ce me ta be better. It dint work.  
Hilda: Aw, too bad! I'm sorry to 'ear dat.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

co-driver - The person sitting in the passenger's seat in a car.

e.g., So I was the driver, Anna was the co-driver, and Bob was in the backseat when all of a sudden. . . .

submitted by moink

co-ollybobbles - Stomach ache.

e.g., If you eat those green apples, you'll get co-ollybobbles.

submitted by Catherine Sears Keane

co-ompetition - Co-operation during competition.

e.g., The two drivers were engaged in some friendly co-ompetition during the better part of today's race.

submitted by Peter J. Beckwith

co-opetition - Competitors co-operating to increase the "pie" overall while competing to divide it up.

e.g., Co-opetition between the Marketing department and the IT department led to the successful launch of the company's intranet.

submitted by paddle9

co-opurration - Feelings of satisfaction and amiability when all parties work well together.

e.g., Everyone in the room sat around relaxed, comfortable, and smiling -- claws retracted, after forging a mutual agreement of co-opurration.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

co-whores - Not the usual cohorts, but two ladies of the night who ply their trade together, each watching the other's six, so to speak.

e.g., "Well, if I'm not your type, baby, you might want to consider going out with my co-whore, Chris. . . . Which one is she? She's the one wearing the red mini-skirt, black blouse, and killer pumps -- what we jokingly refer to as whoreshoes."

submitted by HD Fowler

co2 generator - Similar to oxygen thief; not an altogether worthless person . . . but close to it.

e.g., Chris isn't completely worthless. As a CO2 generator, he helps plants.

submitted by alex hood

coa - Centre of Attention. For one who has managed to draw attention to herself.

e.g., He's been dancing on the table all night and has managed to become the COA again.

submitted by jhulz - (www)

coach - To give, hand over.

e.g., Adam, can you coach me that pillow?

submitted by Nick Reif

coagulate - When two dogs simultaneously wag their tails at each other, in mutual approval.

e.g., After scaring a cat half to death, Fido and Spike always coagulate each other.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

coagulites - A group of people that socialize in a public pedestrian thoroughfare and block the path of people who are just trying to get from point A to point B. In other words, a group of socialites who block pedestrian traffic like coagulated blood blocks blood flow.

e.g., I would have made it class on time, but a group of coagulites were blocking the hall.

submitted by Sam Espiritu

coal de sac - The place in a vein of coal or coal mine where the coal peters out: further drilling or mining in that direction is illogical and fruitless.

e.g., When we eventually hit a coal de sac in this mine, we'll have to veer off in another direction right away.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

coal mine, coal miner - Another artschool term. A drawing class in which you are required to make lots and lots of big drawings using soft charcoal from 8:00 to 6:00 in the evening. When you are done, you look like you have been coal mining.

e.g., When I came home from coal mining, I made the mistake of lying down on the bedsheets I just cleaned.

submitted by Nicholasx

coalburn - A mixture of lemonade and iced tea.

e.g., A tall glass of coalburn goes down smoothly.

submitted by shell

coalution - Most coalitions are just there to complain about something and they don't have any solution. The rare ones with a credible solution can be called coalutions.

e.g., What we need is a coalution formed from within our organisation to break away and find solutions to these year-old problems.

submitted by Gaston St-Pierre - (www)

coaster - What a CD is called when there is an error writing to it.

e.g., My computer crashed while I was burning a CD, so all I got out of it was a coaster.

submitted by T-Dot

coathanger - To jettison or abort something important to your inner being.

e.g., I coathangered my love for Ricky Ricardo as I was more concerned with Lucy's happiness.

submitted by Adam Dachis - (www)

cob - To describe a state of upset or dissatisfaction which results in lack of communication between two people

e.g., "Don't cob on me again." OR "That's it! I'm cobbing on you now!"

submitted by Thonoir

cobalt moon - An exceedingly rare event. Much rarer thaan a blue moon where a full moon occurs twice within a calender month, a cobalt moon is a second full moon in the month of February, which can only happen in a leap year.

e.g., Monsieur Podium couldn't remember the last time he had seen a Routemaster in Tassin La Demi-Lune. Such an event only occured once in a cobalt moon.

submitted by Dave Widdicombe

cobb - To make something out of nothing, to perform a quick-fix with limited supplies. Usually car-related. Cobble.

e.g., I'll see if I can cobb something together with this duct tape and some toothpicks.

submitted by Kyle Kenny

cobber - Colloquial term for a dog or a loyal and honest person. Used in greeting to someone you don't know so well. Australian origin, late 1800s & early 1900s.

e.g., How's it going, cobber?

submitted by dave

cobble - A meal that takes place after dinner and before breakfast. Usually between 11 pm and 4 am. Most common meal among college students.

e.g., Would you like to go get some cobble around midnight?

submitted by Tyler

cobgnaw - How people "cobgnaw" tells the manner in which they eat their corn on the cob. Some "cobgnaw" typewriter style, while others constantly turn the corn in little circles while they eat.

e.g., You should've seen Uncle Jesse eating those dozen ears of corn. He cobgnawed his way row by row, 'til every little kernel was consumed.

submitted by Susanne Strickland

cobitcherate - Variant of "commiserate": to complain with others.

e.g., "Meet me at the H20 cooler and we'll cobitcherate about the deteriorating state of the English language. And make our own contributions." "You mean to its deterioration? I don't think I'm down for that."

submitted by mikef

cobsquaddled - To be completely confused; baffled; intensely bewildered.

e.g., That formula completely cobsquaddles me.

submitted by Katie Merritt - (www)

cobuffled - Confused and baffled.

e.g., Quadratic equations cobuffle me.

submitted by jake lowe

coburbs - The conversion of farms and farmland to suburban housing. Country and suburbs unite to form coburbs.

e.g., I moved to the coburbs as soon as I could afford to. My new house is built on what used to be a dairy farm. Love it.

submitted by Lyle

cobwebsite - a website which hasn't been updated for a long period of time.

e.g., "I did a search for some useful current information, but all I got back was broken links and cobweb sites."

submitted by Greg

cocacolonialism - The spread of Western culture into foreign countries via mass product marketing.

e.g., Africa's assimilation into Western culture came less through political or religious influence than through the allure of cocacolonialism.

submitted by Christopher Kenton

cocacolor - A color reminiscent of light passing through Coca-Cola. Adj. Being this color.

e.g., Sierra loves my cocacolor eyes.

submitted by BigAssFries

cocept - An idea that fits in with another so well that they must be thought of together.

e.g., A few cocepts that come to mind are gravity and string theory, over-population and extinction, and grass and green.

submitted by Jon K. Hart - (www)

cochleomutilance - To purposely listen to an annoying person, really bad music or speech, or for the sake of hearing it, scratching your fingernails across the chalkboard, etc.

e.g., Dave claims he can't listen to Bob Seger. I think he feels it's cochleomutilance, and he's having none of that.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

cock a snook - Also referred to as a five-fingered salute. We've all done it at one time or another.

The Word Detective, December 18, 2000 To "cock a snook" at someone is a bit more elaborate than simply thumbing one's nose. To "cock a snook" is a classic display of derision, properly performed by spreading the fingers of one hand, touching the tip of your nose with your thumb while sighting your opponent along the tips of your other fingers (what the British sometimes call a "Queen Anne's Fan," but what we more commonly call a "five-finger salute"), and waggling your fingers in the most annoying way possible. As a gesture, it doesn't really mean anything, but it does convey utter contempt rather well. Like all fine insulting gestures, cocking a snook always goes well with a Bronx Cheer, or raspberry, as an accompaniment. Crossing your eyes while doing all this is optional but definitely enhances the overall effect. And remember, kids, practice makes perfect.

While the phrase "thumb one's nose" first appeared in English around 1903, "cocking a snook" is much older, first appearing in print back in 1791. The verb "to cock" comes from strutting behavior of male chickens, and means, as the Oxford English Dictionary puts it, "to turn up in an assertive, pretentious, jaunty, saucy, or defiant way." The "snook" is of uncertain origin, but may be related to "snout," which would certainly make sense.

e.g., The name for the gesture may not have come along until 1791, but what'll you bet cocking a snook was popular amongst the Founding Fathers?

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

cock of the walk - The big cheese, head honcho, big man on campus, man about campus.

e.g., With my new suit on, I'm the cock of the walk.

submitted by Mike Sedita

cock-a-hoop - The Hindu: "When one is 'cock-a-hoop' about something, one is extremely happy or pleased about it. You are [un]usually delighted about something that you have done. The main stress is on the word 'hoop.' 'Cock-a-hoop' is considered to be rather old fashioned." American Heritage Dictionary : "1. Being in a state of boastful elation or exultation. 2. Being askew."

e.g., Headline: "NBL is all cock-a-hoop about catch."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

cockadervy - (KA-ka-der-vee; n.) An unconscious, unintended slip of the tongue, the pen, or the keyboard brought on by a deep-seated mental focus on something other than the topic about which one is speaking or writing, and which generally leads to a happy ending or a fortunate turn of phrase. [From O. Henry's short story "Springtime a la Carte," in which a woman working to type up menus daydreams about her old flame, Walter, with whom she has long since lost touch. She accidentally types one of the dishes on the menu as "dearest Walter, with hard boiled egg." Coincidentally, Walter himself happens to see the menu when he happens to stop for a meal. The word derives from the Latin coctae_durae_ovi_ "hard-boiled eggs."]

e.g., In the 1966 motion picture Assault on a Queen, the U-Boat-salvagers-turned-pirates almost get away with robbing the passengers on the Queen Mary, until one of them, an American with a remarkably poor memory presents himself as a British officer, but calls himself a "LIEUtenant" rather than "LEFtenant": a very obvious cockadervy.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

cockalorum - A real word, meaning "a boastful and self-important person; a strutting little fellow."

e.g., I'm about ready to go into retirement -- at least semi-retirement -- as an inveterate popoff on Internet fora. I've become fed up with all the cockalora I run into. | Too many Internet fora are populated with cockalora.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

cockapult - An erect penis used as a catapult.

e.g., What sort of throw do you get when you use your cockapult to launch M&Ms?

submitted by beelzebub

cockatoo - "The person who looks out for the police in an illegal game [of two-up] is called a cockatoo." (Australian.)

e.g., Charlie, you wanna be cockatoo for a bit? We're gonna' play a little two-up.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

cockkulekomalocka - We were not allowed to use explicit cuss words in school, so we created our own.

e.g., That test that Mr. Teacher gave us was cockkulekomalocka.

submitted by LP

cockodiles - This is my name for women who are looking for men for sex and money in Thailand. Night stalkers.

e.g., There's a cockodile hunter over there at the bar. She sees us now. How long will it take her to set her trap and come over and tell us how handsome and sexy we are?

submitted by Robert

cockpiling - Maintaining a supply of male virility in reserve -- for the day when your current lovers turn up lacking in the virility department. Permanently.

e.g., "Since prostate problems eventually catch up with so many men as they get older, I'm going to start cockpiling now. I have one 25 year-old friend in particular in mind." "You're a 39 year-old nurse. I'd think you'd know he's already past his sexual prime." "Not between the ears he isn't."

submitted by beelzebub

cockroaches - Females who have no unique personality and behave in a predictable way. Never independent from their social group, superficial.

e.g., "Look at those cockroaches over there. They're a dime a dozen here at school. I can't stand them." "Then why are you dating one of them?" "Because she's good looking, of course. And besides. . . ."

submitted by KIKO Reyes

cockroachief - The cockroach-in-chief, the leader of the cockroaches.

e.g., The alien arrived carrying a note saying, "Take me to your cockroachief."

submitted by HD Fowler

cocksident - Penises sometimes make us do regrettable things.

e.g., I didn't mean to have sex with your best friend, it was a cocksident.

submitted by Alan - (www)

cocoanuts - Obviously bored or bewlidered extras seen in the background of movies. From the Marx Brothers' debut movie of the same name, in which all but one of the extras are plainly bored and bewlidered.

e.g., The movie sucked, but it was fun watching for cocoanuts.

submitted by Adam Leslie

coctopanthic - Spanning the gamut of works and style of Jean Cocteau.

e.g., I like coctopanthic literature.

submitted by steve zihlavsky

coctor - A doctor who specializes in urology and treats only male patients.

e.g., Honey, did you manage to get hold of my coctor's office to schedule an appointment for me? When is it? I need to mark it on my calendar.

submitted by Anonymous

coddiwomple - To travel in a purposeful manner towards a vague destination.

e.g., Let's coddiwomple across the food court and find something to eat.

submitted by davidmsc - (www)

code - When you have a cold and your nose and throat are stuffy, this is how the word "cold" sounds. Usually, your friends will understand. If they are horribly mean and insensitive, however, they will point and laugh every time the word is uttered for the next 15 years.

e.g., I'v had this code since Friday.

submitted by lein - (www)

code pie - The need for success.

e.g., Code pie is getting me down.

submitted by Enzo - (www)

code red - For someone who is way hot.

e.g., Guys. Jennifer Lopez in my opinion is code red. She is way pretty. Girls. "Robert Downey, Jr., is a definite code red. He is way hot.

submitted by Melissa

code whore - A contract employee or consulting programmer. Usually refers to the high-rate hourly programmers that will do anything for a price.

e.g., We're way behind schedule, so they're bringing in a team of code whores to pull a week of all-nighters.

submitted by Cujo

codemancer - Variant of codemonkey. A person with a profound obsession for writing computer code.

e.g., You can identify a codemancer by locating her whiteboard. Typically easily identifiable due to the cryptic diagrams and notations on it.

submitted by Justin

codentron - Someone who specialized in cryptology, able to break any code and to create unbreakable informational systems.

e.g., Steven is a codentron in the service of the army.

submitted by Tatomir Ion Marius

codery - the end results of coding (programming)

e.g., that's an amazing feat of codery

submitted by Dave

codicodos - The smell, odor, or olfactory essence of old books, as what one is filled with upon entering a bookstore, library, or archive. This comes from the cell walls of wood and other organic material breaking down over time, the primary one being lignin. From the old latin words: codex (plural codices), which meant "block of wood" split into bound leaves or tablets and written on, and odos, the archaic form of odor.

e.g., As the door to the impossibly bigger book shop opened, my nose filled with codicodos, the smell of books from many years past living their lives upon the shelves.

submitted by Jesse Munn - (www)

codicodos - The smell, odor, or olfactory essence of old books, as what one is filled with upon entering a bookstore, library, or archive. This comes from the cell walls of wood and other organic material breaking down over time, the primary one being lignin. From the old latin words: codex (plural codices), which meant "block of wood" split into bound leaves or tablets and written on, and odos, the archaic form of odor.

e.g., As the door to the impossibly bigger book shop opened, my nose filled with codicodos, the smell of books from many years past living their lives upon the shelves.

submitted by Jesse Munn - (www)

codicodos - The smell, odor, or olfactory essence of old books, as what one is filled with upon entering a bookstore, library, or archive. This comes from the cell walls of wood and other organic material breaking down over time, the primary one being lignin. From the old latin words: codex (plural codices), which meant "block of wood" split into bound leaves or tablets and written on, and odos, the archaic form of odor.

e.g., As the door to the impossibly bigger book shop opened, my nose filled with codicodos, the smell of books from many years past living their lives upon the shelves.

submitted by Jesse Munn - (www)

codicodos - The smell, odor, or olfactory essence of old books, as what one is filled with upon entering a bookstore, library, or archive. This comes from the cell walls of wood and other organic material breaking down over time, the primary one being lignin. From the old latin words: codex (plural codices), which meant "block of wood" split into bound leaves or tablets and written on, and odos, the archaic form of odor.

e.g., As the door to the impossibly bigger book shop opened, my nose filled with codicodos, the smell of books from many years past living their lives upon the shelves.

submitted by Jesse Munn - (www)

codish - The uniquely personal dialect a person uses to say code out loud. Since there's no standard, everyone has her own way of speaking it, with humorous results. Just listen to two coders attempt to engage in conversation over a programming problem -- hilarity.

e.g., Good gravy, Billy has been hacking so long today he's ordering his lunch in codish.

submitted by Moogla - (www)

codology -

© Michael Quinion -- Codology A joke, leg-pull, untrue talk, nonsense. . . . "Codology" has nothing to do with codebreaking, but is an Irishism meaning to pull someone's leg.

e.g., "That sounds like simple exposition, unless you know that codology has nothing to do with code-breaking."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

codology - The science of studying cod (fish).

e.g., He was sitting his exams in codology today.

submitted by Chris Duddle

codswallop -

Dr. Goodword tells us:

Meaning: Bull, bunkum, fiddle-faddle, flapdoodle, hogwash, horse feathers, hooey, hokum, malarkey, poppycock, tommy-rot, whang-doodle, or common, everyday windbaggery.

Notes: This word, which reeks of the days of Uriah Heap, Mr. Micawber, and the Artful Dodger, is in fact so recent a coinage that it has had no time to build a family. It is so English, however, we can easily project a codswalloper who engages in codswallopery, not to mention a naked verb: "You know that Hiram Cheaply is codswalloping if his lips are moving."

In Play: It is an unfortunate fact of modern life that we need a steady stream of words meaning "nonsense": "All that talk about Harry Beard's work in the government being top secret is codswallop, unless the government keeps his work secret to avoid embarrassment." Of course, governments usually provide the finest in codswallop: "For the best in codswallop, flapdoodle, and gobbledygook, we can now turn to Congress's own TV network, C-SPAN."

Word History: One story of the origin of this word would have Hiram Codd patenting a bottle for fizzy drinks with a neck containing a marble that kept the bottle shut until it was pressed inwards. That would have been back in the 19th century. Wallop then was a slang word for beer, so Codd's wallop could have been used by beer drinkers as a term for bad beer or soft drinks. The problem is that codswallop first appeared in print only in the 1950s. Moreover, while the word has been spelled cod's wallop, there is no published evidence of any spelling Codd's wallop. Conclusion? No one has any idea where this word comes from.

e.g., Just because Republicans will be taking control of both houses of Congress come January doesn't mean there will be any less codswallop coming out of Washington.

submitted by [Dr. Goodword's alphaDictionary] - (www)

cody-eto - Name for the perfect guy -- who doesn't exist.

e.g., Jane finally realized cody-eto never was and never will be real.

submitted by ~andrea~

coelacanth - (v.) 1. to discover something completely contrary to one's expectations, especially in connection with a negative premise (e.g., Coelacanths no longer exist. 2. (adj.) of or pertaining to an occurrence contrary to the existing paradigm. 3. (n.) something whose existence contravenes the accepted paradigm. [from the Coelacanth, a type of fish thought to have died out with the dinosaurs, discovered alive in the waters off South Africa in 1938.]

e.g., When the first platypus made its way back to England in the 18th century, the naturalists of the day derided what they believed a crude hoax: their verdict was that the dead specimen before them was an otter or a beaver with a leather duck bill sewn on to it. Since it did not fit their settled mammal-reptile-bird-amphibian-fish paradigm, it simply could not exist---a real coelacanth.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

coexistulantly - To combine two words, or parts of words, names, nicknames, or phrases.

e.g., When Ms. Blair got married, her name changed to Mrs. Elkington. We decided to call her Blairkington, so her name could be used coexistulantly.

submitted by Julia - (www)

coffee - A person who is coughed on.

e.g., Bill coughed on Nancy. Since she was the coffee, she caught the flu.

submitted by Chris - (www)

coffee - Another word for snuff or chewing tobacco.

e.g., Cal, do you have any coffee?

submitted by Cal Schneider - (www)

coffee jerk - One who works in a coffee shop. Cf.: "soda jerk."

e.g., The coffee jerk was moving so slowly that the line at the pick-up counter was going out the door.

submitted by S Chow

coffee-shop intellectual - That new age, poet-type guy sitting in the corner with a beret on, putting the finishing touches on his Everquest fan fiction.

e.g., Bert: Did you hear him talking? It sounded like he ate a thesaurus. Ernie: It's all a fake, he's just a coffee-shop intellectual.

submitted by Max S. - (www)

coffeesnorter - 1. An exceptionally funny joke discovered while at the computer. 2. A person with a low-threshold for internet humor.

e.g., That was a real coffeesnorter. Now I have to clean my keyboard.

submitted by Geoff White

coffeetize - To drink coffee. Formation can be used with other food or drinks: "sodatize," "candytize," etc.

e.g., I'm so exhausted from last night, I need to coffeetize myself immediately.

submitted by Sam Spade - (www)

coffier - A coffee maker.

e.g., Why's the clock blinking on the coffier? Again?

submitted by rich

coffin fodder - An old person.

e.g., Florida in December is just filled with coffin fodder from up north. | What's the deal with your editors. They sound as if they're coffin fodder. (ED. We are. So are you. Fact is, you don't have to be old to be coffin fodder.)

submitted by Brian Bjolin - (www)

coffin-dodgers - Old folks.

e.g., I went to the bingo and it was full of coffin-dodgers

submitted by Chizza

coffine - A substance used to ingest caffeine.

e.g., We gotta stop and get a cuppa coffine ... I'm jonesing for java.

submitted by Jeffrey

cog - a cat that behaves like a dog

e.g., The cog was waiting for me by the door.

submitted by Bob

cog dis - Cognitive dissonance -- something like this: difficulty assimilating "new knowledge" that contradicts "old knowledge."

e.g., "That sounds like your own cog dis."

submitted by [Jerry Mazza] - (www)

cog nition - The humbling, tragic moment when a young person first becomes aware that he or she is not the center of the universe, but a tiny functional part of civilization.

e.g., Sweet Caroline. Please don't wrinkle that pretty brow nor redden those beautiful blue eyes with tears, now that you realize that you're not Madam Curie, or not likely to be. Just remember that you're a gorgeous 21 year old blonde southern belle, with an acceptable I.Q., and an adorable pout. And that's pretty good for now!

submitted by Charlie Lesko - (www)

cogflabbit - Another word for dammit, but not serious at all. Conflabbit, confound it, dagnabbit, dangnabbit.

e.g., Here comes Bill. Cogflabbit.

submitted by Abubu - (www)

coglottist - A person who speaks the same language as someone else. Similar in structure and use to "coreligionist."

e.g., Henri, you speak French--help me translate this letter from one of your coglottists.

submitted by Brent Kesler

cognatoid - Something that on the surface seems difficult but, in fact, is not.

e.g., At first I was worried about that math problem. But, when I looked again. I realized it was just a cognatoid.

submitted by Tatarize

cogninkmaphone - A small, endangered insect found in the Ursula Swamps of Africa. It has long horns and vibrating legs.

e.g., Mr. Attenborough, check out the giant cogninkmaphone I've found behind this leaf.

submitted by Jess

cognitive displaysia - "The feeling you have before you even leave the house that you are going to forget something and not remember it until you're on the highway." Not original.

e.g., Even though I was forewarned by congnitive dysplasia, I still left without any money or credit cards. In other words, I left my wallet on the dining room table. Again, dammit. I think that was about the fourth time this month -- and it's only the 10th.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

cognitive dissidents - People who think differently from you.

e.g., We all seemed to believe in the theory of evolution. Well, except for George. He's one of those cognitive dissidents.

submitted by Hal Colombo

cognitivity - The power or ability to memorize or learn non-creative feats.

e.g., Andy is not creative at all, but he does possess a keen sense of cognitivity.

submitted by Guru DragonFire

cognizati - Essentially the same as cognoscenti -- those who are especially well-informed about a particular subject.

e.g., "The general consensus amongst the cognizati is that the second term of Barack Obama began on August 30th, 2012, when GOP standard-bearer Mitt Romney uttered his now-infamous “Nope; He’s my boy!” comment. Only three days after his nomination at the Republican National Convention, and Romney’s campaign was seemingly folding like a cheap tent.  
 
Angst had been building inside the circles of the national media within days of Romney announcing his choice of Congressman Alan West as his Vice Presidential running mate. Much hay was being made about Mr. West’s relative lack of experience in administrative or elected office, and the appearance that Mr. West, a black American, had been chosen simply as a black foil to Barack Obama." | Note: "General consensus" in the first example is usually considered an inferior construct by the cognizati.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

coherse - Coerce.

e.g., I dint wanna do it, but Mabel cohersed me.

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

coibhneas - (pronounced KUV-nee to rhyme with 'above me'... sorta.) (n.) 1. "The Ratio" in Irish, i.e., the ratio of marshmallows to the oat cereal bits (cat foods) in Lucky Charms. (in my (very bad) Irish, _Coibhneas idir adh go bia chait_ or "the Ratio between luck and catfood.") 2. The number of hypothetical chimipanzees versus the length of time it would take before one of them poured themselves a bowl of Lucky Charms with no marshmallows at all. 3. The ratio of good things to bad in one's life (the marshmallows are the 'good'). 4. The ratio of people trying to do something you like (the marshmallows) to people who are just getting int he way (the catfood). 5. An obvious choice: 'Coibhneas vs. catfood.'

e.g., "What's the Coibhneas in that Box?! I only got five marshmallows! Everyone else got loads!" | "Look, this is an easy choice: twenty years hard labor versus six months in minimum security with full visitation. It's not coibhneas to catfood, man."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

coinapulting - The action taken when you have only smaller "silver" coins and you need to give them that extra push to get them to register into a pesky vending machine.

e.g., I had to coinapult my dime into the soda machine to get it to count.

submitted by Pat Nowak

coincert - That annoying sound that changejinglers make.

e.g., Jerk behind me was putting on a full symphony coincert.

submitted by ZenRhino

coinciparallelism - When a person or vehicle travels along a narrow road, lane or pathway, "coinciparallelism" is the surprising tendency for that vehicle to converge at a point at the very same time as two or more other persons vehicles.

e.g., 1. Traveling down the narrow lane, the bicyclist marvelled as he experienced another episode of coinciparallelism as he overtook a jogger at the very point and time as an on-coming truck. 2. Does a high coinciparallelism index account for my high auto insurance rates?

submitted by Mark Dietz

coincubine - An extremely high maintenance girl friend.

e.g., Tank: Sweet Gee, man -- check out that chick! She makes my bones vibrate! Frank: You can grunt but ya gotta punt, Bro. She and Mount Everest! Heed me -- dat babe's a true coincubine!

submitted by Charlie Lesko

coinensadince - Coincidence. At least that's what I thought the writer had in mind. Among the worst misspellings I've ever seen -- if not the very worst. From "The Racist Tweet War Against Obama Comes to New York."

e.g., "No, it's just a coinensadince." | "What a coinensadince. " | "Is it a coinensadince that he is racist AND stupid?" | I suppose you think it's just a coinensadince that Palin is an anagram of Alpin[e]. | "Certainly not a coinensadince that they have such an ignorant outlook." | "What a coinensadince that so many of those [caught called] out are claiming to have had their Twitter accounts hacked."

submitted by Miss Speller - (www)

coinfusion - That uneasy moment when you receive change from a vending machine or shop assistant and can't tell if you're being duped.

e.g., Tallulah stood still, with her change in one hand and her donut in the other -- she appeared to be paralyzed by coinfusion.

submitted by Brendan

coinjugal - Think coinjugal bed, as opposed to conjugal bed = marriage bed. A coinjugal bed is one where an act of prostitution takes place -- where the man (usually) pays for sex in the coin of the realm. Or with plastic coin. On the spot, so to speak. In the conjugal bed, payment isn't quite so direct, immediate, or obvious. Antiquated though the latter concept is, how can one resist? To a man this editor's age, the man always pays. Always. One way or another.

e.g., "You say Harley was caught in flagrante delicto?" "Umm, maybe, if that means the same thing as being caught in the act -- conjoined with a hooker in a coinjugal bed."

submitted by HD Fowler

coinkedink - Used humorously, when saying coincidence is just too serious a word to use.

e.g., What a coinkedink. I didn't know you liked cheesecake too.

submitted by Tia

coinkidoink - /coin-key-do-ink (say it fast)/ slang for coincidence

e.g., "WOW! My friend wore that same shirt today! What a coinkidoink!"

submitted by speed psycho - (www)

coinking - The action of playfully pinching any fleshy part of a person's body. Also leading to "coinkage," an accumulation of playful pinches.

e.g., Oi. There'll be none of that coinking in this bar.

submitted by ShannonH - (www)

coinkydink - A coincidence. Observing that things are oddly synchronizing. May be used as a false exclamation of wonder, to suggest that one ought to take a closer look at the obvious. Or used to annoy others by applying for no apparent reason. | Coincidink = coincidence. A strange happening, unusually odd. Coinkydink.

e.g., In the minute or so I was composing a post for the Google Image Search Game, someone else put up the same picture I had come up with. Not surprising, you say? That was on a thread that hadn't been posted to for 81 days, making it a third degree coinkydink. | What a coinkidink. We were just talking about you, and bam . . . here you are. | "Merely a coinkydink that former ABC News correspondent Linda Douglass is the Director of Communications for the Obama White House Office of Health Reform?"

submitted by quizzy | krisite j. - (www)

coka soaka - When you open a can of a carbonated beverage and it sprays all over the place.

e.g., I opened a 2-liter of Coka Soaka and it ruined my white shirt.

submitted by Chris

coke - The real thing.

e.g., Waiter: What will you have to drink. Customer: A large Coke. Waiter: We don't have Coke, will Pepsi be all right? Customer: No. Please, God, save me from Pepsi.

submitted by Boris

cola - Sweet, cool.

e.g., What say?We're on the guest list for The Sea and Cake? Cola.

submitted by kenneth

cold approach - CIA expression: To approach a foreign national (usually an individual with access to information) with the intention of recruiting him as an informant (usually paid).

e.g., There have been many cold approaches of Iraqi government officials in the last ten years.

submitted by Stephen Mize

cold potatoes - A code word used to hint to the person talking to you that she needs to stop saying what she is saying without saying, "Be quiet. The person you are making fun of is right behind you."

e.g., James: Hey, did you hear that Mr. Hamilton (Boss) farts whenever he ... Jon: Cold potatoes, J. James: ... So, did you finish those TPS reports?

submitted by Jon Nicholas, III - (www)

cold-a-hellen - A slang word meaning that it is very cold outside. Used mostly in the Lancaster County area of PA.

e.g., I am putting on my long underwear, because it is going to be Cold-A-Hellen tonight.

submitted by Chris W

colding - What lies somewhere between chilling and cooling is colding. A verb, to make cold. Also: to cold

e.g., "Close the door! I'm colding in here!"

submitted by Jodan - (www)

coldless - Loss of any heartwarmth in soul; uncaring, negative conscience, having no "sorries" or care. More than a bit like ruthless.

e.g., Johnathon is coldless. He has neither feelings nor conscience; thus he cares for nothing.

submitted by kelly oden

coldneck - A person who has yet to discover and embrace the joy of properly insulating one's neck via a mullet or other acceptable hairstyle.

e.g., Hey, JP, that coldneck is making fun of your Camaro.

submitted by bandar

coldwater-sandwich - Beer. Beer is made using many of the same ingredients as bread, so beer is "liquid bread." Take a cold slice of liquid bread and put it in a can and you got yourself a coldwater sandwich.

e.g., Grab me one of them coldwater-sandwiches from the ice chest, would you?

submitted by Mark Schlickman

coldwater-sarnie - A British version of Coldwater-sandwich, "sarnie" being a recognised colloquialism in the UK.

e.g., I'm off to the pub for a coldwater-sarnie.

submitted by snowqueen - (www)

colink - Heating vent in the floor of a house, apt., etc. that blows warm orc old air into a room.

e.g., I dropped my keys down the colink.

submitted by Bryan

collabracadabration - Pronounced: kuh-lab-ruh-kuh-da-bur-ey-shuhn 1. A magical process of working together. 2. A product of ordinary groups of people doing extraordinary work.

e.g., The extraordinary growth of the social web is the collabracadabration of "us using us." If not for the chief magicians of collabracadabration, Wikipedia would not exist.

submitted by Mitch Bashore

collagadgetry - All the gadgets and supplies you need to make collages.

e.g., I don't understand it. The Small Business Administration rejected my request for $33.5 million to open and stock a collagadgetry store. Did they think Hobby Lobby would run me out of business?

submitted by HD Fowler

collagetry - Collage + poetry. The intersection of a collage and a poem. The poetic message embedded in a collage.

e.g., I stumbled upon collagetry as I studied a recent collage and extracted the verbal messages contained therein.

submitted by Linda Starr

collapsion - The destruction (literal or figurative) of an object or building, in a manner that is more violent than collapse, but more contained than explosion.

e.g., When they demolished the state-funded stadium, taxpayers were treated to a spectacular collapsion of the building (as well as their money).

submitted by Roger - (www)

collar id - When the label on a shirt of jacket sticks out the back for all to see, that's Collar ID.

e.g., Joyce wished someone had told her she was sporting Collar ID.

submitted by Hal Colombo

collaterals - Pulling off two failing laterals in one football game.

e.g., We were playing and the team decided to pull these collaterals out of nowhere. I mean, come on guys, collaterals in a serious football game?

submitted by retiredtireiron

collectaball - A collectable scpherical object. Also collectiball.

e.g., In the world of Star Trek collectaballs, nothing is more highly prized than a mint condition, 1970 Acme Co. ''Spock'' rubber bouncing ball. In original packaging, of course.

submitted by malone

collective voice - The use of a plural term which allows the speaker to avoid being identified as, or explicitly naming, the sole actor --or to imply a voluntary agreement or impose an obligation where none exists.

e.g., We lost control of our career. (For: I lost control of my career.) | We need to stop making so many mistakes. (For: You need to stop making so many mistakes.) | We all believe we have a duty to serve others (For: I believe I have a right to make you serve me.)

submitted by Reed

collectorize - The simultaneous acquisition or collecting of anything and sorting, categorizing or organizing of such. Rock collectors & museum curators both collectorize things.

e.g., I happen to be a collectorizer of useless info.

submitted by steve zihlavsky - (www)

collins class - Adjective meaning very shoddy or dodgy, or generally crap. Used when describing something that doesn't work. Taken from the Australian submarine of that name.

e.g., That haircut is completely Collins class.

submitted by Dave

collollopsed - To collapse, dramatically, with sort of semi-epileptic-fit type movements.

e.g., Charlie drank 20 bottles of high-velocity beer, stood up too quickly. and just collollopsed.

submitted by Whizzbang McGuirk

collyness - same as craziness, but better.

e.g., Who just drank 181 bottles of beer? Thats collyness!

submitted by Ashlee - (www)

collywally - Someone who is crazy

e.g., Eddie just jumped off a building. He's a collywally--or was.

submitted by Ashlee - (www)

collywobology - The study of intestinal cramping.

e.g., The college's collywobology program was quickly put down by the local proctologist's union.

submitted by Joey Golden

colodorant - This word encompasses two vital personal hygiene products -- deodorant and cologne. Since we need both, an individual can be succinct by using one simple, descriptive word.

e.g., After sitting next to you at dinner this evening, I must tell you, you are in need of colodorant.

submitted by Jay Arena

colomonoagilactity - The feeling of apathy towards sports.

e.g., James had colomonoagilactity for football that summer.

submitted by Fitch - (www)

colonelly - To a very great or a very intense degree; above majorly.

e.g., Most people would say Ohio is majorly boring. I say it's worse; it's colonelly boring.

submitted by Mark Nelson

colonoscophy - The study of punctuation.

e.g., As one who loves the English language, it aggravates my colonoscopy no end, when a writer doesn't know the difference between a comma and a semi-colon.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

colored person - Outdated terminology that was once commonly used to refer to Negroes -- the term "Negro" itself now perhaps little more than a "historic term." "Colored person" is considered offensive by many, although I don't really understand why the prepositional form "person of color" should be acceptable, but the adjective-noun form not.  
 
When I was taught biology in high school and college, I learned three racial classifications: Caucasoid, Mongoloid, and Negroid. I have no idea if racial classifications are taught at all these days -- the concepts having been developed by white Europeans in "European physical anthropologists of the 17th and 18th centuries." Probably not.  
 
The link takes you to the most posted to thread in the usually dormant forum for this site.

e.g., "Marriage or cohabitation between a man and woman of different races, especially, in the U.S., between a [colored person] and a white person" was illegal in 16 states until Loving v. Virginia was decided by the Supreme Court June 12, 1967.

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

colorize - To litter.

e.g., Alex colorized 16th Street when she threw her slurpee cup on the ground.

submitted by Easter Bradford

colorondack - An object that is a hybrid mixture of styles that shouldn't necessarily be combined -- i.e., embodies typical characteristics found in Colorado Mountains (Midwest) and the Adirondacks (Upstate New York).

e.g., Her house is really hard to describe. It's a cross between a city loft and a typical mountain cabin. It's architectural style can be said to be of the Colorondack style.

submitted by ramsey

colostrophobia - Seniors' fear of getting colon cancer and having to wear a colostomy bag.

e.g., Ever since Jerry got colon cancer back in '98 and had to wear a bag, I've had colostrophobia, so I'm getting the old tailpipe checked every five years from now on.

submitted by Fred Brennion

colour me - Works like "I was," but more colorful.

e.g., Colour me surprised. I never expected that to happen.

submitted by elaine - (www)

colouration - For brightly and multiply coloured things.

e.g., Ooh, look at that badger's beautiful colouration.

submitted by JEPT an TOM

colourizeed - Used clothes consisting of white and only one other colour.

e.g., That outfit he wore the other day was really colourizeed.

submitted by Marisa

columbate - "To come together, to join forces dynamically"

e.g., "Friends, let us columbate in the bar for a few jars!"

submitted by Aoife

columnar food - Food that is stacked up on a plate rather than served in sections on the plate surface.

e.g., Columnar food is okay for one course of a meal. However, it loses its novelty with overuse.

submitted by Anne

columnise - To turn something into a column. In engineering terms this would mean getting down and dirty with sand and cement. In literary terms, to "columnise" is to craft written material into your own column.

e.g., Nice blog post. I'll have to columnise that and make out to my readers that I thought of it. This idea is way too feeble for a full feature; not to worry, I'll columnise it.

submitted by Jason - (www)

coma drive - When one must drive from point A to point B, the state one enters during the same long, daily commute.

e.g., Oh, I'm here already. I must have been in coma drive.

submitted by Gayle Mavor - (www)

comaed - Disfunctional component usually computer hardware

e.g., This hard drive is comaed

submitted by Andrew O - (www)

comance - A relationship between two people who work at the same company.

e.g., Noticed Ted and Sarah holding hands? Yes, they're having a comance.

submitted by Cook & Murray

comapadres - Your druggie buddies who share your drug-induced comas.

e.g., Why don't you and your comapadres just slither back where you came from. Comaprende?

submitted by Miss Speller

combat boots - What your mother wears in the worst insult anyone can give you in the Army.

e.g., What a clodhopper you are. I'll bet your mother wears combat boots.

submitted by Steve McDonald

combinate - To play multiple numbers in lottery.

e.g., When I play lotto, I combinate my numbers.

submitted by Gene

comblasterated - Well beyond intoxicated.

e.g., I don't remember much of my birthday party because I was comblasterated.

submitted by David Ladd - (www)

comblot - It's actually a combination of two words--completely forgot.

e.g., I'm so sorry that I missed our meeting, I comblot.

submitted by Kathy Gort

comboable - something that is able to be made into a combo. Used in Pool games.

e.g., "That shot looks comboable"

submitted by bjbasser

combobulate - To arrange or organize. Back formation of discombobulate. | To un-discombobulate. "[C]ombobulate is a tidied bunch of letters just screaming to be put in the Oxford English Dictionary.

e.g., The harried mother tried desperately to combobulate the winter clothing of her absent-minded offspring. | "His supporters did their best to combobulate Bruce after "the speaker was completely discombobulated by the hecklers."

submitted by Joy Yourcenar | [Cath] - (www)

combobulated - When one is completely in order.

e.g., After cleaning my room it is completely combobulated.

submitted by Dane Rauschenberg

combola - Two-year-old's word for "convertible."

e.g., Look Gottwatha, a combola.

submitted by John Booth, Jr.

combonation - Combination, perhaps having something to do with a national musical group.

e.g., Frenglish is a combonation of French and English.

submitted by Miss Speller

combustulated - Similar to discombobulated, but with no sense of confusion: angry, frustrated, out of sorts, upset. So overheated mentally your head may cause your hair to bust into flames. Because it correlates so well with combustible, this should have been an existing word all along -- as my friend Jim thought it was when he used it yesterday.

e.g., When he corrected my correct pronunciation of Cro-Magnon, I went off on him -- I definitely combustulated. Dammit, he told my sister, Dee, he'd quit doing that to me -- either trying to impress me with his knowledge of foreign words or putting me down, whichever it is. Will he never learn that adults don't want to be corrected -- especially when they aren't wrong in the first place? It's terribly, terribly offputting. If he ever calls Dee stupid again, watch out. | Every time I hear the smug and supercilious Ellis Henican expound on O'Reilly, I combustulate and wish he were in the room with me so I could smack him upside the head -- box his ears I would. It irritates me no end to think that he gets paid for his appearances, but I have to settle for yelling curses at him -- despite my wife's dismay. | I have a friend who's just about the nicest, sweetest woman you'd ever want to meet -- unless you get her all het up and combustulated about politics. Then, watch out. You might be well-advised to keep your distance if you're a flaming liberal and tend to spout off about your views.  

The Girl may not be as extreme in her view of liberals as I am -- mine approximates "The only good liberal is a dead liberal." -- but I never said she was perfect.

submitted by [Sandbox Jim] - (www)

come orver! - it's what you say when you miss someone a lot and just want to see them face to face. it sounds cuter than just plain old "come over."

e.g., i miss you lots, come orver now!

submitted by Paul Jarvis - (www)

come out missing - Loosen and detach but consequently is nowhere to be found. Turn up missing, go missing. end up missing teeth or "being eliminated" perhaps as the result of "coming out" to the wrong person or people.

e.g., Johnnie's very loose tooth came out missing during the night so we had to substitute a shark's tooth under his pillow the next night.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

come punk shun - The attack of guilt one gets, when sending a kid brother as a decoy through the punk group of bullies in the school yard, so you can avoid the gang during the ensuing melee.

e.g., I often feel a strong sense of come punk shun when I tell Mikey to run right past the Havrilla twins and their buddies after school, and I can sneak by. But it's okay -- Mikey's fast and heals real quickly.

submitted by charlie lesko

come-see-come-saw - One or the other, either or.

e.g., When asked to choose between two answers: "Eome-see-come-saw."

submitted by Tim Ward

come-with - A term used when asking someone to join you when going somewhere.

e.g., I am getting ready to go to the mall; do you want to come-with?

submitted by B Dailey

comeapartmentalize - To keep your brain activity, all ensuing behavior, and the consequences for that behavior in such hidden compartments that they, of course, someday comeapart.

e.g., I thought I could let myself get away with it, but my conscience found out and I started to comeapartmentalize.

submitted by B-Rad

comedic - Having to do with the various classes of cosmetics, the overall industry and scope of cosmetics.

e.g., Doris wore the look of a stunned grizzly bear as she entered the comedic wonderland of the new 12 acre beauty store. In fact, she would need all this makeup to cover the grizzly bear look she sported.

submitted by Doris Crinkle

comediocre - Lame or unfunny attempt at comedy.

e.g., I was hanging my head in shame as my father revealed his comediocre side in front of all my friends

submitted by pennelle

comedownance - Opposite of comeuppance.

e.g., 96-point Headline:TV CRITIC GETS COMEDOWNANCE.

submitted by Jeff Oien

comedydiots - Those who think they're really funny, but they're really obnoxious.

e.g., If that comedydiot calls me bubba one more time, I'll slap him in his input section.

submitted by rick

comes with saying - Literal opposite of the phrase "goes without saying" -- used when a statement really does need to be pointed out as it appears to be utterly unknown to the other party.

e.g., It comes with saying, but you really ought to do something about that peculiar smell in here.

submitted by Richard Munn - (www)

comesee - "its similar to come here, its what you say when you want somebody to come and look at something, usually used by itself"

e.g., ""Hey you, comesee""

submitted by Bud Atkins

comete - A birthday party at a fast food restaurant.

e.g., Are we going to have a comete for Patrick?

submitted by Squackle! - (www)

comfart zone - The phase in a relationship where you finally feel comfortable enough to pas gas in front of your significant other.

e.g., Man, I was so glad that I finally got married. I just couldn't hold my gas in any longer.

submitted by tony

comflicts - When hardware or software conflicts with your computer for whatever reason.

e.g., You might want to take out the old memory stick so there's no comflicts with the new one.

submitted by Lesah

comfordable - Pretty simple, a cross between comfortable and affordable.

e.g., The couch we bought at the flea market was very comfordable, a bargain at only $25. Soft as a baby's bottom.

submitted by Chris Sullivan

comformodore - Standard Australian family sedan.

e.g., Gee, I'd really like this year's new model Comformodore.

submitted by andy - (www)

comfortabate - to make oneself comfortable

e.g., please, come in and comfortabate yourself

submitted by Candace

comfortability - A desired state of comfort.

e.g., I am more interested in the bed's comfortability.

submitted by Max

comfty - Comfy.

e.g., Those sweatpants are comfty.

submitted by Sheila

comic-kazee - To really bomb at a live comic performance.

e.g., Brad: So, how'd you do at Monday night's open mike night? Mike: I really comic-kazeed. Brad: Yeah? Mike: Yeah, should have prepared my material better.

submitted by Paul

coming together - Polite Formula 1 slang for a crash.

e.g., That's Alonso and Irvine having a coming together.

submitted by Adam Leslie

comm-union - A Confederation of Otherwise-I dependent Clergy, United to Pool Their Power to Better Negotiate Terms of Employment with "Management" -- i.e., the church.

e.g., Richard Wanted to Work as a Priest, But Did Not Want to Belong to the Comm-Union.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

comma-prone - Inclined to use more commas in writing than the typical modern-day American writer. Especially someone writing for a newspaper, where space has always been at a premium. How else can you account for newspapers' style guides almost universally opting not to use the Harvard, Oxford, or serial comma? The comma after and is sometimes needed for clarity -- but newspapers often leave it out even in those cases. Chances are the style guide says "Don't use a comma after and unless it's needed for clarity." Writers and editors seem to ignore the "unless it's needed for clarity" part and take the easy way out by always avoiding its use. That may save time for them, but it takes up time for their readers when they try to figure out what's been written.  
 
I opt for a potentially unnecessary comma if I think it will keep a reader from being misled. Nota bene: To me, serial commas are never optional. I follow the Chicago Manual of Style and always use them.

e.g., "I'm not sure I would have punctuated the sentence quite like that. I suspect that I'm less comma-prone than the writer is, but considerably more comma-prone than you are. There are definitely places in your essay where you didn't use commas that will have to be changed before I'll go live with it. They are included in the mark-up that follows. [One thing I'm certain of: I have more of a proclivity for asides than anyone else I know -- as well as more than a tendency to use hyperlinks in e-mails and posts to forums that allow them. No one has to take the links unless she chooses to."

submitted by HD Fowler

commaddicted - Someone who is addicted to using commas in her writing -- including poetry and pd entries.

e.g., A: Your punctuation sucks. B: I know, I'm so commaddicted.

submitted by Jessi

command prompt - A program that comes with all versions of Windows, unless they have X64 CPUs, for most have X86 CPUs, and have Command Prompt. The program is made for programmers to use a programming language called MS-DOS, but is a newer version, being for Windows. The original MS-DOS was back in the days when there was no such thing as the internet, while the Windows version includes some commands that may need to access the Internet.

e.g., Out of all the programming languages I use, one of my favorites is MS-DOS, the version that resides in the Windows XP Command Prompt.

submitted by star651

commangle - Mutually harmful, usually verbal, activity between individuals.

e.g., Deidre and Roberto lived singular, happy lives of self-absorption. Until one day they met, decided to marry and move in together, and spent the rest of their lives commangling.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

commaphiliac - Someone who loves to use commas, and tends to overuse them. Contrast with commaphobe.

e.g., Damn, whoever processed my PseudoDictionary submittal, must be a commaphiliac. There were, no commas at all, in what I submitted, but what was added, to the dictionary has about, 17, commas.

submitted by H - (www)

commentate - Comment. This word brings flavor to a conversation. A back formation from commentator.

e.g., "Jim, why are you talking to yourself?" "Well you know, Bill, I like to on what I do."

submitted by San Wolfson

commitafire - My three-year-old daughter referred to her humidifier as a commitafire.

e.g., My room is dry and I can't breath right until you turn on my commitafire.

submitted by Brian Kovacs

commode commando - Jumping into the shorter restroom line, usually the men’s, in order to urinate.

e.g., Seeing that the line to the women’s bathroom was interminable, I decided to become a commode commando and used the men’s instead.

submitted by nitag - (www)

commodorebogan - A person who drives a Commodore, usually in a stupid manner.

e.g., The guy that crashed into the pole was a definite commodorebogan.

submitted by jimmy

common - Come on.

e.g., Houseblend: Common over to Baltimore County, MD, and walk into Starbucks. It is just like going to Best Buy! August 5, 2011 at 7:06 pm

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

common scents - Certain odors or smells are very familiar. Perhaps we encounter them often so experience them frequently.

e.g., Here are some common scents that may waft your way soon: cooking|food, coffee, perfumes, soap, flowers, mowed grass, gasoline, smoke, body odor, flatulence|bodily waste.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

commonsensability - A category for software features that do not fall under any other category that ends in "ability," such as "stability" or "scalability" or even "usability."

e.g., Using SQL Server for this project gives us the reliability we need. Not using DB2 gives us commonsensability.

submitted by Klaus - (www)

commonsensical - A combination of common and sense.

e.g., It's not commonsensical. Many executives are not commonsensical.

submitted by Michelle

commontary - 1. Discourse, usually vacuous, when unexpectedly meeting friends, neighbors or strangers (e.g., "I really don't mind the heat--it's this humidity that's a killer.") 2. A narrative of bland events and happenings that ocurred in one's absence (e.g., "Junior refused to eat his vegetables at lunch today -- I had to entice him by making believe each spoonful was a choo choo train." 3. Biased personal opinions expressed in written form, or more commonly, verbally in social settings (e.e., "I have the solution to the Iraqi problem -- nuke 'em.")

e.g., Upon meeting Mike (on the street corner) (by the water cooler) (at a party), Andrea kept him (glassy-eyed and groaning) (pinned down) (struck dumb) with her 30 minute commontary on (the weather) (world politics) (her children).

submitted by Charlie Lesko

commontater - Commentator. Common taters are something else entirely.

e.g., In addition to her newsreader duties, Megyn Kelly is sometimes used as a commontater.

submitted by Miss Speller

communion police - Those stalwarts of the Roman Catholic Church who take it upon themselves to determine who should and who should not receive communion. See wafer wars.

e.g., "This was a huge public event and no one was instructed to be the communion police ordered to stop or interrupt the taking of communion for anyone present."

submitted by [subodot]

communism - The belief that an action is right and logical when it is either ludicrous, stupid, obviously foolish, comedically wrong, or completely inappropriate.

e.g., Eating Burger King's French fries is communist.

submitted by franklet - (www)

community chest - A container into which everyone puts a little something.

e.g., I thought we had an exclusive relationship, until I discovered that she was the town's No. 1 community chest.

submitted by Steve McDonald

comodian - Combination of "commode" and "comedian," used in sarcastic namecalling by children after someone makes fun of you or tells a stupid joke.

e.g., Ha ha ha, you sure are the brilliant comodian, Chris.

submitted by yimay - (www)

comorbid - New to me. "Pertaining to two diseases which occur together, such as ADHD and depression."

e.g., "I’m sure I wasn’t quite the maverick in coming up with the term and it just hadn’t spread to the web in those days, but I still half-joking swear to my web design students, when I make them read Steve Krug’s book [_Don’t Make Me Think_] , that I at least comorbidly came up with the phrase 'it's not rocket surgery' around 1999-2002."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

comote - The television remote control. Full version:comote retrole.

e.g., I want to watch television. Where's the comote retrole?

submitted by Melissa

compactify - To condense, to shrink, to make smaller, to put into a compact state.

e.g., Please compactify the results of your experiment so that they will fit on this page.

submitted by Mike Repin

company detox - Process going on post-Enron by which companies are publicly purging their balance sheets of previously unreported items that might scare investors if they found out by accident or through the press. Also known as "balance sheet detox."

e.g., Did you see that exceptional charge on the profits of XYZ announced last week? Talk about company detox.

submitted by Alan Morrison - (www)

company, the - Central Intelligence Agency.

e.g., The Company is quite likely to grow in both funding and personnel due to the events of 9-11.

submitted by Stephen Mize

compartmentalized - Information that is limited to only certain people, disregarding rank and authority, has been compartmentalized. From the X-Files show and its premise that information about the alien invasion was limited to only a few key people in the FBI. Actual word created by Glen Morgan and James Wong. Used extensively by me during work hours to describe my activities.

e.g., Boss: You clocked in at 8 and nobody has seen you since. What have you been doing? Me: Sorry, that information has been compartmentalized. Can I go to lunch now?

submitted by Quito Washington

compass - A computer student who happens to be an ass.

e.g., I really wanted that other marking scheme. I'm gonna find that compass who complained.

submitted by Gabe

compassiontainment - Television or other mass media presentation that makes the audience feel better about itself by featuring guests or subject matter that evokes feelings of compassion, sympathy, or pity: the misery and misfortune of others is a primary source of entertainment.

e.g., Oprah didn't realize that Jonathan Franzen refused to participate in her Book Club because his novel _The Corrections_ is partly a criticism of America's infatuation with her patented brand of compassiontainment.

submitted by Bob Stewart

compatible damage - This is damage or harm or destruction that you can live with, even accept or benefit from -- no one seems to mind or complain about it.

e.g., The lying waste of village AK443 during the revolution was regarded as no big deal: it was simply considered as more compatible damage, quite acceptable.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

compblugerslauge - Hip, retro . . . awesome.

e.g., Heather: Wow, I'm impressed. You rule the dance floor when you pull off that fabulous little dance move you developed. It's compblugerslauge. Mari: Are you for real, Heather? You sound like a throwback to Grammy Shirley when you talk like that.

submitted by Maria

competism - A disorder when one is always wanting to make anything into a competition.

e.g., Joey's competism gave him many bruises when he ran into a tiger.

submitted by Jess

competitional - Competitional, the adjective form of competition.

e.g., John has such competitional tendencies. He always seems to think he's in a race.

submitted by Myr Wilson

competitious - Competitive.

e.g., When I start playing video games, I do get competitious.

submitted by Lucinda Inganni

competitous - Competitive, for one who likes to compete to win. In my opinion competitive has too many syllables and doesn't roll off the tounge as nicely as competitous.

e.g., I always play rough. I'm very competitous and I hate to lose.

submitted by Nykee

compinion - A company opinion. An opinion someone holds just because she belongs to a group or party or firm where that view is standard.

e.g., The spokesman burbled on to the bitter end, but all that came out were compinions.

submitted by Erasmus Thrasamund

complaint of actors - 'Complaint' is the word used to describe a group of actors.

e.g., At the restaurant I noticed a complaint of actors crowded around a table.

submitted by Shane McPherson

completionist - It is used to describe both (a) a person who feels compelled to complete something once they have started it; and (b) a person who collects certain related items (for example, all Star Wars related things) and buys eveything they can in the collection even if it is something that, on its own, the collector would not particularly like.

e.g., I would not recommend the new Star Trek book to anyone excect completionists.

submitted by Norm

complexcellent - Technically complex and very well done.

e.g., Thomas, that beat you made up on your drum set is complexcellent.

submitted by landon hildebrand

complexibility - The more flexible a system or process is, the more complex it becomes. Typically used to describe flexibility in software that leads to great complexity.

e.g., The complexibility of the system caused the users great frustration.

submitted by Ian Cole

complexicated - The state of being both complex and complicated. (See complexify.)

e.g., I couldn't finish the assignment because the instructions were so complexicated.

submitted by Pseudoryx

complexify - To make something more complex and complicated. Used by SecDef Donald Rumsfield.

e.g., "We do not want to simplify for them; we want to complexify -- if such a word exists."

submitted by [Donald Rumsfeld] - (www)

compliddity - Usually occurs after someone asks you a question, and your answer is slightly delayed, and she asks "Are you sure?" The little bastard makes you doubt yourself and you aren't sure whether you were sure, or were ever really sure about anything. Long-term effects include the overall inability to make up your mind.

e.g., Due to an episode over super-sizing a Mcmeal to split with his girl last January, Jerry was in a constant state of compliddity and had to rely on a shiny silver dollar to make up his mind.

submitted by bre

compliement - 1. A compliment used to complement other forms of obsequiousness. It also adds another confusible to the "complement" vs "compliment" confusion. 2. Fanciful sycophancy. 3. Praise about and via the internet.

e.g., She was fawning over me already, but then she compounded her sycophancy by offering the sugariest compliement I had ever heard. Don't you just love it when people suck up to you that way? | Bro's e-mail: "Flo, honey, I really LUV the way you use sexy cursive fonts with baby blue colors in all your e-mails." Flo's reply: "Wow. Thanks for the compliEment, dawg."

submitted by Machiavellean & . . . Lesko - (www)

complify - To complicate or make unnecessarily complex. Complexify.

e.g., No need to complify. I don't understand it, anyway. Too many factors lead to overcomplification during the development of a performance plan.

submitted by Kimi

compliment magnet - Said of make-up, clothing, jewelry, or other accessories so attractive that they draw an inordinate number of compliments.

e.g., She's a stand-alone compliment magnet, no matter what she's wearing or what she's doing. Using one inadequate word to describe her, she's terrific.

submitted by HD Fowler

compliment sandwich - A compliment that upon closer examination is found to be a criticism. From the practice of wrapping criticisms or insults, sandwich-like, between two compliments.

e.g., His girlfriend said, "You were so thoughtful to buy that sweater for me. It would've been even better if it had been the right size. What a sweet gift." Yeah, nice compliment sandwich.

submitted by Kathy Valenti

complinsult - A more succinct way of saying backhanded compliment (already in the dictionary). A compliment that is then hastily returned with an insult, supposedly to lessen the blow of the latter.

e.g., You should take this as a complinsult: You don't look as fat in that dress. | Comments like that make you sound much less stupid than usual. That's not a catty remark -- it's a complinsult.

submitted by Elamberdor

complooter - A slurred version of "computer',"used when trying to make a situation lighter.

e.g., Can I go on the complooter? "No! You've been online for the last three days straight."

submitted by Tamar Pacht

compooter - A computer that is laggy, is slow, not virus-protected, brecks down continually, or freezes easily. You can stop the breckdowns if you just use the right shampoo.

e.g., Sorry, laggy compooter. I keep on trying to talk to you and play music at the same time, but it keeps freezing.

submitted by Ian Faynik

compophobia - An intense fear of creative writing.

e.g., If your limbs become rigid and your brain freezes at the sight of a blank sheet of paper or if your gastric muscles involuntarily contract at the mention of "verbs" or "descriptive," you may suffer from compophobia.

submitted by Brew

comprendex - A computerized index used with software, database, and web applications.

e.g., The comprendex returns all corresponding prices to the products selected in the e-commerce web site.

submitted by Brian Thompson

compromote - To move to a higher position in an organization's hierarchy by means of incorrect criteria.

e.g., Just because Marvis has superb computer programming skills, he got compromoted to be our supervisor although he lacks obvious social skills.

submitted by MD Caruso

compruter - Ghetto slang for computer.

e.g., Can you help me with my compruter?

submitted by plastic - (www)

compstipation - The reason for all computer output interruptions.

e.g., I couldn't get my current bank balance because the bank's computer was compstipated.

submitted by Wayne-o

comptonization - The process in which a Caucasian enters, if you may, the ghetto or the projects, and is faced with having to prove herself unwillingly against an African-American.

e.g., George and Hamilton had a terrifying experience with comptonization last Friday walking down street to get a 40oz. Miller High Life.

submitted by Juan Huizar

compuchips - A potato snack shaped like oversized computer chips -- and they make you smarter.

e.g., I've been eatin' the new compuchips for nigh on to three months and already my IQ has shot up to 77.

submitted by Paul Edic - (www)

compunabula - Forlorn, extant, or obsolete computer-related items. Generally related to the collection and appreciation of said items. Based on the word incunabula.

e.g., It started when I got my first Apple II, and now I can't even get into the basement because of all the piles of compunabula I've got down there.

submitted by Grant Hutchinson - (www)

compunsition - To compose or create a pun.

e.g., Fredericka's phrase was a compunsition of such rhetorical fragrance that the chairperson demanded a 15 minute recess.

submitted by Mark Lee - (www)

compusexual - New classifiction of sexuality, used to describe someone who has bonded to her computer in a special way and requires no human contact beyond her system. Usually a recluse.

e.g., Our best guess is that she's compusexual, seeing as how she isn't interested in one sex or the other but loves her computer.

submitted by Nick Umstead

computato - An adjective used to describe a person who does nothing more than sit at his computer for hours on end.

e.g., Dave's turned into a computato since he got his new computer. His wife is giving him hell.

submitted by Gary Burk

computer pimp - Person who uses the internet dating systems to meet and date numerous people

e.g., Kyle has meet so many women on the internet he has been labeled a computer pimp.

submitted by Kirby Daniel, Jr

computer serial killer - Anyone over the age of 50 who refers to a computer as "the machine" and would most likely fry it if she ever touched it.

e.g., My grandpa became a computer serial killer yesterday; it kept beeping at him and he threw his shoe at it.

submitted by Ryan Greenzweig

computerate - To use the computer.

e.g., I wish I had more time to computerate.

submitted by John E. Cline

computercommuter - Someone who stays at home and works "in the office" via computer.

e.g., On Mondays and Thurdays the boss is strictly a computer commuter.

submitted by John Horvath - (www)

computerus - The soothing place where hackers and hardcore gamers go to be surrounded by and meld with their equipment. This environment is similar to the quiet sensory deprivation and isolation of the womb.

e.g., After a tough work week, Bret curled up in his computerus for a weekend of electronic solitude.

submitted by The StormBringer

computery - Used when watching the movie new moon to describe the shapeshifters.

e.g., Wow, Jacob is too computery.

submitted by Roy

compution - Computer-based solution.

e.g., Different computions may be available for the problem.

submitted by Parameswaran

comshaw - A military term for requistioning without a requistion.

e.g., Hey, sailor, ain't that the Admiral's ring? Yeah, you comshawed it.

submitted by G R Roberts

comversion - Conversion to a communist.

e.g., After his comversion, Howard Dean started calling all Republicans "capitalist pigs."

submitted by Redwyre / Stoffle - (www)

con grass man - A federal or state house legislator who works hard to convince his "roots" constituency that he is working hard.

e.g., A wise Con grass man will pour out continual, smooth layers of concrete information via media interviews, speeches, newsletters, and special annoncements to cover his grass.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

con sensual - The state of a woman, who does not like sex, yet is willing to have sexual relations to please her partner.

e.g., Studies of the sexual habits of American women, show that there are millions of women in the U.S. who are frigid, but pretend to enjoy sex in order to keep their personal arrangements positive.  
 
On the other hand, if a woman is "turned on by convicts," then, Bingo! We have a triple meaning phrase!

submitted by Charlie Lesko

con'um drum - A percussion instrument, used while speaking, to obfuscate meaning so as not to be held accountable for content.

e.g., The politician was elected for several terms through his skillful use of con'um drums.

submitted by Charlie Lesko

conan - (n.) 1. The friend of a babysitter who comes along to help with the kids, or to just sit and do homework or whatever ["Co," as in "associate" + "Nan," short for "nanny"]; 2. Two women or girls both of whom are named "Nancy" ["co" + "Nan," short for "Nancy"].

e.g., "Who's gonna babysit, Mommy?" "Erica's coming over." "Oh, Erica's fun. She's not bringing another conan, is she?" "Well, yes, I think it's her cousin Emily." "I remember Emily. She painted everyone's fingernails black and made us wear black lipstick. She's weird." "Not anymore. After she fall off that building last summer, she's decided she really doesn't want to die, and she's stopped being a Goth." "A Goff?" "No, Goth. Goths like black and sad things." "Bleh: conan the Goth." "She's not a Goth anymore." "Okay, conan the unGothed."

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

conan o'brian - For Conan O'Brian's best-known move on late night TV. Conan "jumps," then points at Max Weinberg and the Max Weinberg 7, then does a little jump again, then spins.

e.g., Joel Goddard (LNwCOB announcer): It's Late Night with Conan O'Brien. Tonight ... Musical guest is. . . . And your host, Conan O'Brien . . . doing the Conan O'Brian.

submitted by you-don't-wanna-know

conaster - 1. With star. The exact antonym to disaster; the fortunate outcome of an almost imminent disaster; the sensation of a catastrophe narrowly averted and later remembered from the vantage point of safety. From Latin cum, with + Greek astron, star. 2. Conastrous. Of the nature of a conaster, causing great relief.

e.g., 1. There were several conasters in my life that I cannot recall without thanking God for his undeserved mercy. | You were born under a lucky star. This conaster is an amazing mixture of chance and miracle. 2. I had a conastrous experience after being caught in a storm while windsurfing.

submitted by Mikhail Epstein - (www)

conbobaly - Muffled, okay, average, not great, flustered, problematic. (con.bob.lee)

e.g., Her Japanese was great, but her English was conbobaly.

submitted by Josie

concensus - The convict count. "Consensus" is misspelled "concensus" so often, we need a word spelled "concensus." No claim of originality, though. Idea of one more coming back in than went out came from a Ridley Pearson novel, The First Victim, if memory serves. Comedian Stewie Stone joked of marrying the same woman twice, which he really did: "It's like breaking out of jail and then breaking back in."

e.g., Bert: Hey, Ernie, what's goin' on? I did the concensus and we got one too many guys came in from the yard. Ernie: Nah, you musta miscounted. Bert: No, I checked and checked again. We got one too many. Somebody musta busted in.

submitted by HD Fowler

conch, the - TV Remote Control. The Conch from William Golding’s "Lord of the Flies" represented power and order over all else. Whoever held the Conch had the authority to speak and controlled the group for as long as they possessed the shell. In this context, whoever holds The Conch (i.e. the TV remote) has the power to flip through channels and decide what everyone in the room will be watching on TV.

e.g., Pat had control of the conch and I was forced to watch reruns of COPS all night.

submitted by Stephanie

conchquistador - A champion gatherer or harvester of conch. In honor of my deceased friend, Don Mintz, who coined the word. Pronounced the same as "conquistador."

e.g., Once Don, sailing in the Bahamas, acquired a taste for conch he became a conchquistador.

submitted by Frank J. Mandriota

conciliatorious - To act as if you have just saved the world by meerly talking to a few people

e.g., "He's quite conciliatorious, isn't he?" "Yeah. Comes with the job."

submitted by

concluscious - To be luscious because of intelligence.

e.g., You wrote an award winning paper on supersymmetry? A Nobel Prize, too? You're so concluscious.

submitted by danica & pinder

concoction - When a heterosexual prisoner shuns homosexual advances.

e.g., Listen, Mugsy! We're just cellmates - nothing more. And please . . . don't take my concoction personally.

submitted by Joe Kreiter - (www)

concraption - A device designed to save time, but instead consumes it.

e.g., I'll fax the report to you tomorrow, if I can figure out this concraption.

submitted by Brent Kesler

concrapulations - A sarcastic way of saying congratulations.

e.g., Well, concrapulations to you on your new promotion.

submitted by Ryan

concreightor - Someone who ate concrete for some unfortunate circumstance.

e.g., Billy is a concreightor, surfing is his passion.

submitted by Eloy

concrete poisoning - What you die from when you throw yourself off a high building and land in the street.

e.g., "Looks like a case of concrete poisoning," Detective Finney said, looking up at the ledge, then down at the corpse.

submitted by Deacon

concretiate - To solidify.

e.g., In order to concretiate the facts, the detective did further investigating.

submitted by Michael Naujunas

concretize - The process of turning all of the greenspace on the planet into parking lots, sidewalks, and roads.

e.g., The developers are slowly concretizing the grass in front of the library because people will take shortcuts across the lawn.

submitted by Rhett Bryson - (www)

condementia - A mental illness. Condementia is a two stage disease. The first part being an uncontrollable collecting of condiments and the second the constant and irrational use of such.

e.g., Her condimentia was made apparent when I opened her cupboard to find she had seven different kinds of tomato sauce. I watched in dismay as he proceeded to coat an otherwise perfect pizza slice in the most awful array of sauces. It was the most severe case of condementia I had ever seen.

submitted by Wefneck

condiddle - A real word. We usually don't accept synonyms for stealing, but this is the kind of word we occasionally make an exception for. You're not going to find condiddle in most real dictionaries, which is reason enough for us to add it. You can find last-gasp words such as this in dialect dictionaries and other specialty dictionaries.  
 
The Routledge Dictionary of Historical Slang: "condiddle | To purloin, steal: coll; ca 1740–1860; extant in dial., where it arose. Scott in St Ronan’s Well, ‘Twig the old connoisseur . . . condiddling the drawing.’ Ex DIDDLE, a, and to, cheat." || Merriam-Webster online says: dial Brit | transitive verb | : to make away with secretly : steal, waste.

e.g., "You tell me what happened to it, officer. I've had my '63 Merc on blocks in my garage. Shrink-wrapped, more or less, these last 45 years. Now it's gone. I was countin’ on selling it to supplement my retirement income -- after taking it on one last cross-country trek. I noticed it was missin' when I got up Sunday mornin'." "Well, sir, I'd say your car was condiddled about three o'clock Sunday morning, the usual car condiddlin' time in these here parts. We'll be on the lookout for it on eBay. We've seen a lot of that happenin' in Scottsdale the last several months." "Hmmm, then why don't you shut down the car theft ring?" "Intend to . . . as soon as we have enough evidence for a conviction."

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

condimentarian - Condiment connoisseur.

e.g., Being a condimentarian, he could not enjoy his steak without a variety of steak sauces to choose from.

submitted by M Hedges

condimentia - Deterioration of intellectual faculties, such as memory, concentration, and judgment, specifically relating to condiments. Not to be confused with condomentia -- where your boyfriend forgets to put on his safe.

e.g., John keeps forgetting where he's put the ketchup. I think he has condimentia.

submitted by Laba

condimentia - Being unable to distinguish the salt from the pepper.

e.g., Severe condimentia was robbing him of the spice of life.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

condolence - Faking an active lifestyle (outdolence) while actually being indolent.

e.g., He was living a life of condolence, pretending he climbed mountains, ran long distances, and generally avoiding strenuous things.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

condominimum - A condom for the short: small condoms. Coined with this meaning ~1982. The word is obvious for referring to a minimum-sized condominium. A word for a wee version of Condoleeza Rice: condiminimum.

e.g., Midget to druggist: Do you sell condominimums here?

submitted by HD Fowler

condoring - Hitting the volleyball very high .

e.g., Why do you keep condoring the ball into the trees?

submitted by Connor

conduicy - (Rhymes with JOHN-glue-ih-see; n.) 1. The quality or state of being a conduit, especially 2. The nature of a person serving as a guide or an intermediary. 3. A mother's ability to bring people into the world. [From Latin con 'with' + ducere 'lead.']

e.g., The television, and now the computer, are paradigmatic examples of conduicy, being as they are mediating devices used by those with information to inform those who don't have such information. | On Mother's day, we celebrate our mothers' conduicy on our behalf.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth - (www)

cone - (v.) 1. To surround, outline, or close off with (usually orange) traffic cones so as to block public entry because the area surrounded, outlined, or closed off because it is under construction, under investigation, under attack, undermined by sinkholes, under the control of psychotics, under consideration for preservation or condemnation, or whatever.

e.g., "I can't find a way out of the mall parking lot; it's all been coned." "Well, fortunately, the mall has restaurants. We'll survive."

submitted by sScott M. Ellsworth - (www)

cone computer - A bunch of crunched-up pieces of an ice cream cone sticking out of an ice cream cone. So called a cone computer because the ice cream cone looks like the computer tower, and the cone bits look like little computer chips.

e.g., I tricked my brother into thinking that I bought him a new computer. When he looked at it, he freaked out. I had just given him a snack; a cone computer.

submitted by Star651

cone zone - What Conan O'Brien (Late Night with Conan O'Brien) calls the portion of the stage he uses for his opening monologue.

e.g., Careful, you're about to drift into the cone zone.

submitted by adipex

coneheads - Typically, the passengers or guests on a cruise ship. So named because of their penchant to consume mass quantities' of alcohol, and then act crazy. From the movie The Coneheads, with Dan Ackroyd and Jane Curtin.

e.g., Bartender on cruise ship: You wouldn't believe what those coneheads are up to tonight. Entertainment Director: I think I'll grab my videocam and film them for the day-by-day video diary.

submitted by Paul

coner - Mildly derogatory term for submarine crewmen who work in the forward compartments, and who are not nuclear-trained technicians.

e.g., See if one of the coners can find a wrench for you.

submitted by Varrick Nunez

cones - Drivers of vehicles that are widely spaced and moving at or below the roadway's posted speed limit.

e.g., I had to pass a bunch of cones back there before I could catch up with you.

submitted by g. white

confab - Corporate speak for "to meet." Can also be used more casually.

e.g., Hey, let's confab out in the parking lot and smoke a couple of cigs.

submitted by Paul

confabulate - To tell a story that is false, while the author starts to believe that it is true, in order to appear more convincing to everyone else.

e.g., My friend always has to confabulate when he meets new people, especially after a few drinks. Confabulating is quite common when men try to pick up women.

submitted by Toulina

confarbled - 1. Messed up. 2. Tangled.

e.g., 1. Our computer system is down because some hacker confarbled the server over the weekend. 2. Ack! These stupid audio cables are confarbled again.

submitted by Mike Halchin - (www)

confetto - (n.) 1. one piece of confetti: a sparkle, a streamer, a bit of paper; 2. a really small celebration. (From the Italian.)

e.g., "What's this strip of paper? Hey! is someone shredding our records?!" "Nah, it's just a confetto from the party we had last week." | Sure, you're important: look, we can have a celebration; I'll throw a confetto and everything.

submitted by Scott M. Ellsworth

confidentiality trap - Any website, chain letter, e-mail, or other form that seems innocent but tricks you into giving away personal, embarrassing, or otherwise stupid information to an individual, usually the one you got linked to the site by.

e.g., AARGH! Kelsey lured me into a confidentiality trap. Now she knows that I have a crush on Danielle.

submitted by Mobius Paradox

confidentulous - To make a conversation feel extremely safe from eavesdroppers.

e.g., Don't worry, this is confidentulous.

submitted by lost

confignant - Confused and ignorant.

e.g., If you apperar to be confignant, expect the other kids to make fun of you. Especially if you're always slow about discovering things.

submitted by Beej - (www)

conflagration - An allowance made to prisoners to display national banners.

e.g., The warden strictly limited the conflagration to one flag per con.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

conflama - Mixture of conflict and drama. Usually involving juicy gossip.

e.g., So much conflama tonight. Lester opened the closet door and found his girlfriend in there ... with someone else.

submitted by Kate - (www)

conflection - conflicted reflection

e.g., After his girlfriend dumped him, Josh spent the night in conflection trying to decide where he had gone wrong.

submitted by Spidey

confliction - A conflict of information.

e.g., When the paper said the concert was at eight but the website said it was at seven, there was a confliction.

submitted by David Rubin

conflictogism - A statement that contains in itself a contradiction or violation of what is being said. {ED. Not to be confused with a conflictorgasm.}

e.g., When you said, "I'm just a fallible mortal and will never make the mistake of forgetting that," wasn't that a conflictogism of sorts? | "I never use bad words and I challenge any of you bastards to catch me at it." "Caught you in a conflictogism, didn't I, Erle." | "My son is not illegitimate. His father and I were married three months after he was born." "I'm giving you a conflictogism flag for that one, Sharon." {ED. If a woman is married at the time she gives birth, but not to the biological father of the child, is the child a bastard? Inquiring minds want to know. Because of artificial insemination, I'm betting the answer is no. How could it be otherwise?}

submitted by Steve McDonald

conflummoxed - Being confused by your own actions.

e.g., I was too conflummoxed afterwards to be able to explain why I did it. Still don't know. More or less just a bad case of the stupids.

submitted by James Tague - (www)

conflustered - An emotional state, feelings of both confusion and agitation.

e.g., Presented with the overwhelming variety offered by the menu, Mark became conflustered and rushed out of the restaurant.

submitted by Big Daddy

confoodled - The condition of utter confusion caused when one's noodle is full of immaterial stuff.

e.g., I was confoodled when I read the directions for submitting an entry to this website because my noodle was already thinking about things I should have been doing instead.

submitted by D. S. Tuxhorn

confoozled - Confused and bamboozled.

e.g., This problem is hard. I'm confoozled.

submitted by Kristy

confoozled - Extremely confused.

e.g., I get so confoozled sometimes. Do the shoes go on your hands or your feet?

submitted by EggieChan

confrase - To confuse or mix common sayings or phrases.

e.g., Diane: "You're as cool as a cocoanut." Anthony: "I wish you wouldn't confrase things. It's "cool as a cucumber." "Make like a tree and get out of here." - Young Biff, from Back to the Future II.

submitted by Mossy

confrazzled - Confused and frazzled.

e.g., I can't finish my trigonometry homework. I'm so confrazzled.

submitted by Nicole - (www)

confrustipation - Mental or physical paralysis caused by a combined state of confusion and frustration, resulting complete lack of productive output.

e.g., Getting his story published finally allowed Boutros to break through his confrustipation, thus ending his long struggle with writer's block.

submitted by Buzz Voelker - (www)

confrustrated - Being both confused and frustrated at the same time.

e.g., After this morning's class I was confrustrated about what to do.

submitted by James Lainton

confuct - Of a situation where everything that could go wrong is going wrong: everything is messed-up.

e.g., Romeo took his life, leaving Juiet confuct.

submitted by JB

confuddled - Very confused.

e.g., This whole mess has left me confuddled.

submitted by Metal Girl - (www)

confudeled - Confused.

e.g., I went into math class confudeled and came out the same way. Maybe more so.

submitted by Miranda Card

confudlepate - To confuse.

e.g., When the teacher tried to explain the algebra equation, I became confuddlepated and didn't understand what she meant.

submitted by Carrie - (www)

confugal, confugality - Problematic, problems.

e.g., A child custody dispute added confugality to the divorce proceedings.

submitted by mike ward - (www)

confugure - To unintentionally configure something so it doesn't work.

e.g., Ralph really confugured his computer. It won't even boot.

submitted by Scott Monster - (www)

confuncled - When clothing is rucked up and twisted around.

e.g., "My jumper was all confuncled." "Jumper? Isn't that some equestrian term?"

submitted by Jane Rodgers

confunderstood - A mix between being missunderstood and confused, first used by buddies Nick and Matt.

e.g., Yes I know I am confunderstood.

submitted by jillian

confurious - A cross between confused and curious, like when someone is trying to tell you something but can't remember how they want to say it and you want to know what it is.

e.g., "Come on, Micky! Spit it out, you've got me confurious!" said Kristin when Micky couldn't get to the point of his story.

submitted by Kristin D. (Tallon) - (www)

confusalated - For a state of mass confusion.

e.g., After his explanation I was more confusalated than ever.

submitted by Jacqueline

confusative - When learning grammar, there are three main cases to consider, accusative, dative, and confusative.

e.g., I have no idea if this sentence is in the dative or accusative, so I'll just use confusative, because grammar is all a bit beyond me really.

submitted by Jacq

confusatory - Use this when you're so confused, you don't even know what adjective you're looking for.

e.g., Math boggled them; they found it very confusatory.

submitted by Elizabeth

confuscate - Combines confuse and obfuscate to mean deliberately confusing and obscured -- usually for nefarious reasons.

e.g., That Web site confuscated the results so that the client couldn't tell if the campaign was successful or not.

submitted by Dominic Tassone - (www)

confuse - To join, weld, fuse together. Also a means of igniting confidence men or convicts.

e.g., He lit the confuse and the ensuing blast melded the cons. Their remains were put in a container.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

confusement - A synapse lapse, when neurons in your brain don't connect properly, leaving you unable to form complete and rational statements.

e.g., Sorry, there seems to be some confusement.

submitted by Pig Pen

confusement - The reaction to receiving conflicting information or instructions.

e.g., I was told to hurry up without concern to a timetable. This caused confusement on my part.

submitted by Rick Rapp

confusenik - 1. Loony liberal left. 2. Cause groupies. 3. Anti-anti-terrorism protesters. 4. Has-been Marxist-Leninists. 5. Powerless protesters. 6. Protesting mental midgets. 7. Disaffected dupes. 8. Political pawns or patsies.

e.g., Not ever having been touched personally by real difficulties in life, the confuseniks were able to run rampant with their anti-Bush protests.

submitted by Jack Vanderloo

confusiasm - Also confusiastic, confusiastically. When a person is always confused and stupid, he/she is confusiastic. There are three kinds of confusiasm: Stupid confusiasm, Comic confusiasm, and Deliberate Confusiasm.

e.g., Sheena is confusiastic because she's always saying stupid things and asking "What?" Von is confusiastic because he'll go up to you and say "Mmmzzznrhamanerang" just cause it's funny. Emmanuel is confusiastic because he acts stupid to be cool.

submitted by BigAssFries

confusiastic - One unknowingly confused, and enthusiastic about what is thought (mistakenly) to be understood.

e.g., Jeff is confusiastic about ... oh, lots of things.

submitted by Jeff Collins

confusible - Misspelling of "confusable."

e.g., Confusible is confusable with confusible.

submitted by S. Berliner, III - (www)

confusicated - Confused.

e.g., After three hours of studying partial differental equations, Bryan was still as confusicated as ever.

submitted by Froggee285

confusled - A word taken from Winnie The Pooh that means, essentially, being confused--but sounds a whole lot cooler than plain ol' confused.

e.g., Heffalumps and woozles, are very confusled, because they come in every shape and size.

submitted by Tara

confuslicated - Mix of confused and complicated.

e.g., This problem is so hard I'm hopelessly confuslicated.

submitted by noel ballantine

confussed - Concussed, confused, and counfounded combination. See also: bad spelling.

e.g., Maybe I'm an idiot. I'm confussed. Please e-mail me to get this straightened out. Or, maybe the problem is that you don't express yourself clearly?

submitted by Tzarius - (www)

confust - When at work and one is confused, frustrated, and needs to swear.

e.g., Upon receiving the finished prototype for testing, I was confusted because it looked nothing like my detailed specs.

submitted by Stacy

confusted - To feel embarrassed, weirded out, and confused -- all at the same time.

e.g., Sally felt confusted after she misunderstood Mark.

submitted by Dustin Burnett - (www)

confusticate | confusticated - Orig: Tolkien. Apparently a contraction of "confuse" and "frustrate," often used as a very mild curse to place upon someone who has vexed you. | To be extremely confused.

{ED. Having run across these again and combined them into a single entry in the lexicon, I've noticed something I glossed over initially. Not to rain on Clownburner's parade or dispute her etymology, but I've never heard either "confuse you" or "frustrate you" used as imprecations. However, I have heard "confound you" used that way. So, I'm going for the source word for the curse sense of confusticate as being confound rather than confuse. If, that is, if confusticate has been established previously in the sense of a curse. Q.E.D.}

e.g., Confusticate him, he put my sneakers in the icebox again. | Wait, so you met a holabawho in holabawhatsville? I am so confusticated.

submitted by Clownburner | Erib

confusticated - To be extremely confused.

e.g., Wait, so you met a holabawho in holabawhatsville? I am so confusticated.

submitted by Erin

confustication - Confusion, frustration.

e.g., OMG, we have a Spanish test next period. I didn't study at all, and I dont understand a thing. Aaaggghh! The confustication.

submitted by jesi

confustrigated - Confused, disgusted, and agitated or irritated.

e.g., This new computer program has the whole office completely confustrigated.

submitted by Lorna

confuzzled - Confused and puzzled at the same time. | Confused.

e.g., That game confuzzled me no end. | The confuzzled student tried to solve the confuzzling math problem.

submitted by Sera | Jeff

confuzzling - A mix of confused and puzzling.

e.g., This mathematical problem is very confuzzling.

submitted by annabelle

congagulations - Gushing laudations, insincere to the point of choking.

e.g., His congagulations to the newlyweds were quite cheery, nevermind that he almost lost his lunch.

submitted by Froo-froo

congalescence - The period, during which the body recovers from a serious illness, injury or surgery, resulting from learning to dance the Conga.

e.g., I hope my congalescence doesn't take too long.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy

congealatin - The usually clear congealed gelatinous material formed from the juices of, and often found clinging to leftover meats in a refrigerator, such as ham or turkey leftovers.

e.g., A few seconds in a microwave oven will usually free a serving of leftover meat from the disgusting globs of congealatin that formed on it overnight in the refrigerator.

submitted by Dave Violette

congelitude - A sticky or slimy congealment

e.g., She was sick over the train window and the sun baked it into an unsavoury congelitude.

submitted by Colin Taffel

congrats - What Paul and Garret and everyone else should receive for getting 10,000 fictitious words.

e.g., Congrats to everybody on your accomplishment of 10,000 words.

submitted by Brandon Ducharme

congre gape - The act of gathering together in a crowd to be fascinated by the ongoing events at an accident, or at a similarly unusual event.

e.g., While driving by the burning, overturned tractor trailer, I had to really slow down to avoid hitting those who had come to congre gape.

submitted by charlie lesko

congrolences - To congratulate a person with his new "whatever" and a sad feeling for the person at the same time.

e.g., I hear you were called to be the new scoutmaster. My congrolences.

submitted by Joey Anderson

congrouchulations - Used when giving folks insincere good wishes when something special or pleasant happens to them.

e.g., Sure he commended me on winning the sales award, but -- you could tell by his tone that he was actually offering congrouchulations -- NOT congratulations.

submitted by Mitchel Yerzy - (www)

conjufusion - The fusion and confusion of tenses when conjugating verbs. Has nothing to do with conjugal visits.

e.g., I have difficulty following Hubie Brown because of conjufusion.

submitted by Oirad Zitro

conjunck - The guy in the movie theater who has a laser pointer and keeps pointing it at the movie screen.

e.g., That idiot at the movie theater was a conjunck.

submitted by Squackle! - (www)

conker - "A 'conker' is a horse chestnut. A 'spanner' is a wrench." (Check the link for the British English Quiz in the "Links for Word Lovers.")

e.g., Do not confuse a conker with an hors d'oeuvre. | If you cut your finger in England, bandage it with  
 
a conker?
a spanner?
a plaster?

submitted by HD Fowler - (www)

conmerging - Merging and converging used together in one word: Merging and converging conmerged.

e.g., The traffic was conmerging on the freeway.

submitted by penny

connect four - Solving a friend's problem by putting all the pieces in order and solving all the loose ends.

e.g., Albert's house was on fire, his cat had to have surgery and he needed $5000. So needless to say I pulled a Connect Four and he is all right now.

submitted by natmac